Before we approach the subject of stay-at-home daughterhood head-on and form a defense thereof, I believe it imperative that we first begin at the beginning. What exactly do I mean by that? Well, I believe we should step back and discover from God's Word what exactly womankind's job description is-why woman was created, what she is to do, what high callings Almighty God has given to her, etc. This valuable study will provide us with a beautiful portrait of womanhood which will reveal just why stay-at-home daughterhood is so important to the heart of God and to His plan for women, and how it fits into His design for womanhood.
The Book of Beginnings
If we're going to "begin at the beginning" with our study, what better place to start than in Genesis, the Book of Beginnings, where woman first made her debut in this world?
To begin our overview of the purpose for woman, we must turn to Genesis 1 and 2. Genesis 1:1-31 gives us an awe-inspiring description of God's work of creation. For six consecutive days, the Lord added, stroke by stroke, beautiful new designs to His portrait of creation. On day 6, man, the crown of God's creation, was formed and fashioned into a being in the image of Almighty God Himself. Genesis 1:27,28 tells us that mankind, consisting of man and woman, was created in God's image, and as such, were to be His ambassadors on this earth by multiplying greatly and subduing and taking dominion over that created earth and all contained therein. Chapter 2 of Genesis, which, for our purposes we will be focusing on now, tells of the creation of Eve with much more detail than chapter 1 gave us. Chapter 2 provides us with a description of the home God fashioned for the man and woman (the Garden of Eden); tells us that God commanded Adam to not eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil; and then presents to us the very reason why woman was created. God had given Adam the duties and responsibilities of tilling the ground (Gen. 2:5b,7), tending and keeping the garden (Gen. 2:15), naming the animals (Gen. 2:20), and, as noted previously, taking dominion of and subduing the earth and multiplying greatly, thus filling it (Gen. 1:28). Adam was given many jobs to do, but was without a helper to aid in these or a companion with whom to share stories of his accomplishments. Genesis 2:18 says this: "And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.'" Prior to the end of each day of creation, God had looked over what He had made and declared it to be good. On day 6 however, after creating Adam and commanding him to not eat of the tree of knowledge, He declared it not good. There was nothing wrong with this creature, Adam, but there was something missing. Adam was alone, and this was not at all a good thing. Here, in verse 18 we read of the main reason God created woman.
Woman is to be.....
A helpmeet to man.
Eve was created to be a helper to Adam. Prior to her creation, Adam was surrounded by a beautiful, perfect world full of rushing waterfalls; the pleasing aroma of fresh flowers; animals of every kind, size and shape; mouth-watering foods-everything he could ever want, right? Wrong. Despite the beauty that surrounded Adam on every side, he was neither happy nor fulfilled. Each animal had its mate, but Adam was left without such a companion-alone in a breathtakingly beautiful garden with no one to share it with, no one to refresh or comfort him after a day of tending the garden, no one to praise God with him or to rejoice with over the magnificence of the garden. God saw Adam's incompleteness and loneliness and knew exactly what he so desperately needed. Adam needed a helper, a completer, a companion. He needed a creature equal to himself and made in God's image as he was, to share his life and burdens with. Our gracious God knew this, and so caused Adam to fall into a deep sleep. While he slept, God took from him a rib and used it to fashion a woman, a glorious helper for Adam (Gen. 2:21, 22). Now, why didn't God simply form Eve of the dust of the ground as He did Adam, instead of going to the trouble of putting Adam to sleep, taking a rib from him, and using it to create a woman? I think He chose this method of creating woman for several reasons. First, I believe He did so to portray the fact that while Eve was equal to Adam, she was not the same as him in all ways, nor should she be. Second, I think our God chose this method of creation so that Adam could wake up to a beautiful, satisfying surprise. Imagine the rush of joy, relief and excitement Adam must have felt as he awoke and saw woman for the very first time! He expresses his bliss at the sight of his helpmeet in verse 23 of chapter 2, forming the first poem ever written. Third, I love Matthew Henry's explanation of the creation of woman: "That the woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not made out of his head to rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be beloved."1.
Genesis 2:21 and 22 is not simply a beautiful account of the creation of woman that is to be read and then forgotten. Rather, this is a passage which holds such rich truths about the duty and purpose of woman. Woman was not made to be on her own, autonomously doing her own thing, as she so often does today. Sadly, many women have rejected one of the most important reasons for their very existence and have en masse neglected their duty to be helpers to their husbands. We would likely be shocked if we knew just how many men there are out there today who, thanks to feminism, find themselves in the same plight as Adam prior to the creation of Eve. They are burdened with difficult, overwhelming duties and plans and they have visions seemingly too big to come to pass. Think of all the great things these men could accomplish if they simply had capable, strong, godly, visionary, supportive helpmeets at their side, cheering them on in their endeavors and helping them every step of the way! Instead, many men today find themselves crippled, for they are without the strength or encouragement needed to accomplish big, great things. Someone once said that behind every great man, there is a great woman. This person had realized something vital to the health of a society and had tapped into knowledge that sadly, very few people-even Christians-possess today. As you've probably noticed, America is suffering terribly from a widespread epidemic. Of what does this epidemic consist? It comes to us in the form of a massive shortage of strong, godly men in the homes, churches, and gates of America. We are bombarded on every side with a sad scene full of an abundance of weak, wimpy, lazy, visionless men who seem to be good for very little. What do you think is the reason for this? I would submit to you that America's lack of strong, manly leaders directly correlates to the lack they have of competent, productive helpmeets to cheer them on towards ever greater plans, accomplishments and victories. Men with big visions usually have wonderful helpers and companions with big visions waiting in the wings ready to encourage and strengthen them. How much more transformed could the above described men of America be if they simply had helpmeets who believed in and prayed for them consistently? God created man to need woman. He had been given his duties; he now needed someone to spur him on with encouragement and respect in order for him to have the gusto needed to heartily accomplish his God-given tasks. In her book Free to Stay at Home: A Woman's Alternative, after addressing the creation of woman, Marilee Horton writes, "From the first, man had the potential to run as fast, jump as high, and sing as well as he ever could. But God made him with an ego that needed a cheerleader, and so with the advent of the female factor, he wanted to jump higher and run faster."2.
There is no magic pill that can be taken for the malady plaguing America and robbing her of godly, masculine leadership. Rather, God must do the work. He must once again raise up godly women who take their high calling as helpmeet to a man seriously and seek to fulfill it with great joy, dignity, pleasure and devotion, for such a time as this. Wives must strive to be the visionary helpmeets our God desires for them to be, and mothers must strive to train their daughters to be virtuous helpers to their one husbands one day. Young ladies (that's you and me!)must begin now to prepare for the high calling of helpmeet by studying God's Word to discover what a helper is to do for her husband and how she is to treat him. We accomplish this task by watching and learning from women older than ourselves (Titus 2:3-5), who are seasoned helpmeets, and by being a help and comfort to our fathers, the most important men in our lives (this we will address further in a future article!).
We have now established the fact that woman is to be a helper to man and that man needs his helper. Now we need to answer the questions, "What is she to help him with? Is there something specific she is to help him do? If so, what?" For the answers to these important questions, we must again refer back to the Book of Beginnings. We already discovered in Genesis 1:28 that man was given the following commands and duties by God Himself: "....be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth". A similar duty is issued forth in Matthew 28:19-20: "Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptising them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.". As the Lord's ambassadors, man is to take dominion of the Lord's creation for the benefit of mankind and seek to evangelize the lost throughout the world. Being fruitful and multiplying (which we will touch on further in the next article) is one of the ways in which man is to fulfill his duty to subdue and take dominion over the earth in Christ's name, for by producing many children and bringing them up in the Word, they are able to have further impact on the world and ensure that this dominion and evangelism will continue, Lord willing, on down through the ages. This responsibility given to man to take dominion over the earth is so vastly important, and obedience to it is crucial. Equally crucial to this, is that each Christian man have a visionary helpmeet by his side, encouraging and assisting him in this vitally important work. Oh, the power of a godly helpmeet! It cannot be overestimated and must not be underestimated! A man cannot fully, in victory, take dominion over God's creation by himself-he must have his helper. Is it any wonder then, with the exodus of women from their husband's side to a life of autonomous living, that America, once a strong Christian nation, is now in the shambles she finds herself? Young adults are leaving the church in alarming rates; teen pregnancies are skyrocketing; well over 50 million babies have been murdered in the name of selfishness since 1973; more than half of all marriages end in divorce; homosexual "marriage" is being legalized; families are falling apart; sexually transmitted diseases are at an all time high; churches are operating according to unBiblical standards; women are largely surrendering the needs of their families to others so that they can selfishly pursue their own careers and lives apart from God's commands; our government is saturated with ungodly rulers; America's children and youth are squandering what could be their most fruitful years in trivial pursuits instead of accomplishing, with the strength of Christ, great things for His Kingdom; and the list could go on and on.
Real Life Examples
How do we know things would likely have been different at this time in our history if wives had been godly and encouraging helpmeets to their husbands and spurred them on to accomplish great works for the Kingdom of God? Because history proves this to be so, and provides us with examples of just such a scenario! One of my favorite examples of a godly, visionary helpmeet encouraging and supporting her husband and his mission is the lovely account of Jonathan Edwards and his wonderful wife Sarah, as recorded in Elizabeth Dodd's great book, Marriage to a Difficult Man: The Uncommon Union of Jonathan and Sarah Edwards. This awe-inspiring read shows us just how much a man can accomplish and what a mark he can leave on society, when he has a faithful, praying helper! Something we must remember about the Edwardses, was that they lived during a time of moral decay. Church attendance was low, the amount of drinking and profanity was high. This is precisely the time for which our Lord fashioned Mr. Edwards, and he went on to be one of the leading pastors of The Great Awakening. The wonderful woman by his side unceasingly supported, served and strengthened her husband, which enabled him to evangelize many souls, edify fellow Christians, and research for and write a long list of books that have touched and changed many lives, having a great impact on countless pastors and laymen both then and now. Through Sarah's help and influence, Jonathan Edwards was able to rise to prominence, and remains to this day a household name in many Christian families. As you can see, being a helper to one's husband is far from an enslaving position of second rate importance-it is an adventure crucial to the heath of one's country and the church. On the vary topic of being a helpmeet, Mrs. Dodds relates the following heart-warming account of Sarah Edwards, "Sarah had most of the responsibility for [their] property. She saw that the garden was planted, that the hired man had his instructions for each day. They used to tell in Northampton how once Edwards asked, 'Isn't it about time the hay was cut?' To which Sarah mildly replied, 'It's been in the barn for two weeks'."3. Sounds like the Proverbs 31 woman! Because Sarah was a competent, godly, productive helpmeet, Jonathan Edwards was able to fully trust in her. This cleared up much of his time, for he knew that his estate and children would be cared for by Sarah's able hands. This allowed him to worry about other things, namely the work of the ministry. It is highly doubtful whether Jonathan would have been able to have the impact on the world that he did, and continues to have, had it not been for Sarah!
Before closing this article on the fact that woman is to be a helpmeet to man, I want to bring to your attention another example of a truly godly helpmeet. Susannah Spurgeon, the wife and helper of Charles Haddon Spurgeon, the Prince of Preachers, took great delight in being her husband's helpmeet. She once wrote, "My whole time and strength were given to advance my dear husband’s welfare and happiness. I deemed it my joy and privilege to be ever at his side, accompanying him on many of his preaching journeys, nursing him in his occasional illnesses, his delighted companion during his holiday trips, always watching over and tending him with the enthusiasm and sympathy which my great love for him inspired. I mention this… simply that I may record my heartfelt gratitude to God that, for a period of ten blessed years, I was permitted to encircle him with all the comforting care and tender affection which it was in a wife’s power to bestow.”4. Wow! Here was a woman who took her role as helper to her husband very seriously, and who knew the great impact such help could have! She didn't complain because she wasn't in the lime light. Rather, she delighted in her husband receiving all the praise. Charles Spurgeon remains one of the most famous English-speaking preachers, and like Edwards, continues to have a major impact on countless people even to this day. He rose to prominence, but not in a day of revival and reform. Rather, he rose to the pastorate in a day of moral and spiritual decay, and was used by God to lead a reformation in England. It was not uncommon for him to preach up to 10 times a week, and over 10,000,000 people heard him preach. He also founded a pastor's college and an orphanage, and wrote a long list of books. Would all this have been possible if he were constantly weighed down with worries of what was going on at home? I think not! Behind every great man is a great woman, and behind this great man was a wonderful woman named Susannah who delighted in and took great joy from her role as helpmeet.
In Conclusion
Young ladies, take heart! America may be decaying all around us, but so were Northamton during the time of Edwards and England during the time of Spurgeon. Sarah and Susannah did not despair when they looked at the sinful culture around them. Rather, they took full advantage of an opportunity to change it for Christ's sake by helping their husbands and advancing their godly ministries. May we prepare now to go and do likewise!
Please return next Friday, when we will take a look at the other important roles God designed specifically and solely for women!
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Footnotes:
1. Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible, pg. 10 (Hendrickson Publishers, 1991)
2. Marilee Horton, Free to Stay at Home: A Woman's Alternative, pgs. 49-50 (Word, Inc., 1982)
3. Elisabeth Dodds, Marriage to a Difficult Man: The Uncommon Union of Jonathan and Sarah Edwards, pg. 36 (Audubon Press, 2004)
4. Charles Ray, The Life of Susannah Spurgeon, pg. 173 (The Banner of Truth Trust, 2006)
Breezy
