This passage proclaims the following: "But if the priest's daughter be a widow, or divorced, and have no child, and is returned unto her father's house, as in her youth, she shall eat of her father's meat: but there shall no stranger eat thereof." I find this passage to be important, for at least two reasons, when it comes to defending the Biblical doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood.
First, notice the phrase as in her youth. As we discovered in part 2 of this article, the phrase "in her youth" refers to the average marital age, a time, in this case in a woman's life, when she is likely to get married. This phrase does not refer to a little girl; it clearly pertains solely to adult women. In this verse from Leviticus, we see that up until the time of this woman's marriage, she was in her father's home. She was not, as I have reiterated numerous times in previous articles, out on her own providing for and protecting herself and serving as her own independent authority. She was clearly, according to this verse, living in her father's home under his care until her marriage. Being widowed or divorced, she does not return to a life of independence (for she had had no such life to return to!), but rather to her former life under her father's roof.
Second, notice where the widowed or divorced woman resides. This grown woman lives in her father's house! Today, many would see this as weird and needless. However, this practice of a woman who no longer had a husband returning to her father's home as in her youth was common for centuries in our own country! If a woman who was left alone without a husband no longer had a father who was living, she would go to live with an aunt and uncle, brother, or some other relative. The principle was that she was not to be left alone to care for herself. She was to be protected and provided for, so that she would not be under the Double Curse! This is precisely what we see in Leviticus 22:13. Genesis 38:11 reveals that this was a common occurrence in the lives of abandoned women. They went to live with their fathers, just as they had before their wedding day. This is illustrative of the fact that God, in His perfect wisdom and loving design, has so ordained matters as to keep women, whatever their age, under protection, provision, and care. What a loving God we serve!
Lest we think that this was solely an Old Testament practice, let us turn to John 19:26-27 and see how Jesus felt about this issue. This passage proclaims, "When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved [meaning John], he saith unto his mother, 'Woman, behold thy son!' Then saith He to the disciple, 'Behold thy mother!' And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home." When He made this proclamation, Jesus was hanging on the cross, knowing that His death was imminent and He would no longer be there to provide for and protect his mother (for, even after He arose from the dead, He would soon be ascending back into Heaven, thus leaving her alone). Understanding this and desiring to keep Mary provided for and protected, he ordered John to take care of her. From then on, not only did he provide for her needs, but she lived in his home. Again, the principle of women not being off on their own, but rather being provided for and protected is seen, this time through the example of Jesus Christ in the New Testament. Evidently, this practice is by no means one that was abolished with the coming of the New Testament, nor is it to be done away with or disregarded today. The protection of women is still high on God Almighty's list of important doctrines, and the practice of women being protected and never being out on their own is one which He desires for us to continue today.
For the last few weeks, we have had the privilege of studying quite a few wonderful verses pertaining to the glories of stay-at-home daughterhood. Now it is time to see stay-at-home daughterhood in action!
The Life of Rebekah, Stay-at-home Daughter
Not only are the Scriptures replete with passages proclaiming and commanding stay-at-home daughterhood, God has also graciously given us examples of stay-at-home daughters in His Holy Word. Through studying these women of God, we are able to acquire a glimpse into the dynamics of stay-at-home daughterhood and are provided with valuable lessons as to how a daughter at home is to conduct herself and spend her time.
We are first introduced to Rebekah in Genesis 24, where we read that Isaac is ready to be married and his father Abraham sends out a servant to find a godly woman for him to marry. The servant meets Rebekah at a well and is blessed by her servant's heart. Verses 23 and following make it clear that this young woman is still living in her father's house. For example, when asked by the servant about the home, she knows the condition thereof (she is not living off on her own and in need of asking her father about the current condition of the household before she can answer!). She speaks of them (including herself in the family residing in that home) being happy to lodge the servant there, and in verse 55 we see that her family wanted her to remain at home a couple more days before travelling to her future husband's home. It is made evident throughout the chapter of Genesis 24 that this unmarried woman was at home with her family, in her father's household. Again, she was not off on her own, independent, and doing her own thing, as so many unmarried daughters are today!
We will touch on this in a future article, but I want to quickly address Rebekah's daily life in her father's household. She clearly did not consider it a life of drudgery or slavery to be at home with her father, despite the fact that she was a grown woman. Rather, she was joyfully dedicated to serving her family and those around her and intent upon making her household a fruitful, productive place. I truly believe Rebekah could be referred to as a true polished cornerstone, don't you?
In Conclusion
Today we have been able to study both a wonderful verse making clear the Biblical practice of stay-at-home daughterhood, as well as an account of a Biblical stay-at-home daughter. I hope you have been blessed through today's studies and that the Lord continues to reveal to you the joys and blessings of the Scriptural doctrine known as stay-at-home daughterhood!
*Please return next Friday for the continuation of our study of stay-at-home daughters in the Bible!
Rebekah, thank you so much for a beautiful exposition of God's word! I would love to read more about your own experiences as a stay-at-home daughter - what you find important, your routines, and anything that you'd like to share. May God richly bless you and your family!
ReplyDeleteLuci
http://overflowingthankfulness.blogspot.com
Miss Rebekah,
ReplyDeleteI just finished reading your 5 parts on being a stay at home daughter. I also have recently watched "The Return of the Daughters". I think you and the video both do a wonderful job of portraying the beauty of the work of the home and helping to dispel the notions that if you are home you are either eating bon bons or are shackled to the stove. For that you certainly are to be commended. I think many women and girls would be surprised at how fulfilling they would find home life if they only gave it a chance.
That being said, I don't think you made a case for the biblical requirement of daughters remaining at home. (please understand I am not against the idea of daughters staying at home and do believe it is a noble and worthwhile way to spend ones single years. I don't want you to think for a moment that I think you or any others who have chosen this should do any different). What you did show rather conclusively is that it was culturally normative for women to live at home until marriage. Thus however is not proof that it is required for all women across all times. There simply weren't options for women in that time for anything else. So yes, many I am certain embraced their roles and worked heartily as unto the Lord, and so we have wonderful examples of daughters at home. But it is their character which transcends time, not their location.
Unfortunately I see you making arguments that sound compelling but aren't based in fact. To point to biblical women being home as proof that we are to be as well
("For example, when asked by the servant about the home, she knows the condition thereof (she is not living off on her own and in need of asking her father about the current condition of the household before she can answer!). She speaks of them (including herself in the family residing in that home) being happy to lodge the servant there, and in verse 55 we see that her family wanted her to remain at home a couple more days before travelling to her future husband's home. It is made evident throughout the chapter of Genesis 24 that this unmarried woman was at home with her family, in her father's household. Again, she was not off on her own, independent, and doing her own thing, as so many unmarried daughters are today!")
You are setting up a false conclusion. There weren't apartment building, colleges, part time jobs, etc like there are today. To assume that the culturally normative lifestyle during Biblical times is what is required of us today, I believe, puts a command from God where no command was given.
(continued)
ReplyDeleteThere is another false dichotomy that needs to be addressed as well. You conclude that either you are physically at home under your fathers roof or you are completely autonomous in a different location without protection. Why is this an either or? Why can't women be concerned with the things of their family, the care of their family and being closely connected to them and under their guidance and protection even if she is in a different physical address?
Another issue of concern is that your conclusion that a household without daughters at home will eventually cease to be productive and crumble without their support. This has problems on many fronts. One- it assumes the daughters aren't supporting from a different location. Two- not all families have daughters. Three- eventually most daughters are going to leave for marraige, what then? Four- what do you do with the fact that there are many Christ following families who love God and desire to glorify him and are serving faithfully and productively with daughters who are off at college?
Something else which needs to be addressed is the calling of singleness. You have put forth that is you are called to singleness then you should remain in your father's home as well. This is a problem as it neglects those that God has called to singleness for certain purposes. (A missionary for example. While I whole heartedly agree with you that there are many people who need to hear the Gospel here in our own backyards, there are people in other areas who need Christ and Christians with means to come to them and preach Christ and help them with things like food and water.) There are many examples of single women who God has called to other countries who have done (and are doing, go read this blog http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/) great and glorious things for Him. I would hate to see these beautiful sisters in Christ marginalized for following the call of their savior.
My concern with the stay at home daughter movement is that it is taking something- being at home- that is a choice that is beautiful and fulfilling and worthwhile and glorifying to God and making it into a requirement. Anytime one takes a good gift given to us by God and makes into something that is required of all people it ceases to be a good. There are so many things you are saying that are true (the goodness of being home, the goodness of being under protection, not needing an institution to get an education, and many other things) that I whole heartedly affirm and would like to see more girls and women believe. But to place a command on the backs of Christians that God didn't place takes away so much from all of that good.
respectively,
Tiffany
Hi, Tiffany!
ReplyDeleteIt is soon to be dinner time now, and so I haven't the time to respond, but I did want to let you know that I read your comments and will be answering soon. I believe you made some good points, and I will clarify on a few things that were mentioned. Also, I do appreciate your respectful writing and kindness. While you may disagree, you were very kind in so doing, and I really appreciate that.
More later! :)
Rebekah