What's the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God Part 1

If you have not yet had the opportunity to read the previous articles released in this series, please click here and do so now, before continuing on with this one!

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You have just begun to read the 15th article in the stay-at-home daughterhood article series. Much time, study, prayer, research, writing, re-writing, editing, and replying to comments from readers have gone into this project. Why would I dedicate such time and effort to such a work as this? The answer lies in the importance which the Word of God places upon Biblical womanhood and its correlation with the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood. The practice of unmarried daughters remaining at home until marriage is so viciously hated in our culture today (the reason behind feminism’s hatred of stay-at-home daughterhood will be discussed in an upcoming article). As we know, the Adversary works tirelessly to alter the truths of God’s Word, to slyly deceive and cleverly trick us into following lies, and to keep us from living out the all-wise plan and design of the Creator God. This is why it is so crucial for us to grasp the depth of the importance of the Bible’s teaching on the roles of unmarried daughters, so that we might return to “the old paths, where is the good way” (Jer. 6:16).

The Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God

The doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood and obedience thereto is crucial for a number of reasons, the first and most important of which can be articulated as follows:

Stay-at-home daughterhood is crucial to the Kingdom of God because God Himself commands it.

This fact is the one which makes stay-at-home daughterhood so very important to the health and furtherance of the Kingdom of God. While other facts can (and will) be brought up which lead credence to the belief that stay-at-home daughterhood is important, no other fact is as crucial as the one illustrated above. Nor does any other fact give stay-at-home daughterhood the vast level of importance as this one does. Because God, in His Word, clearly reveals His design for Biblical daughterhood, it is imperative that we follow and obey it faithfully and with great diligence and joy, knowing God’s will to always be best.

There are many in our day who view this doctrine as archaic, with no relevance to today’s more “enlightened” and “progressive” times. However, nothing could be further from the truth. This stance arises from the belief that stay-at-home daughterhood is mere tradition from the ancient days of Judaism and that it therefore holds no bearing upon the Church. If this were the case, I would not take the time to write such a lengthy defense of stay-at-home daughterhood as I have in this article series. For, following mere human tradition has been what has caused such heresy and seeds of discord and trouble to arise in the Church through the past two millennia. For example, in Jesus’ day, the Pharisees (the Jewish leaders) were notorious for creating their own traditions, elevating them to the level of Old Testament law, and striving to enforce the people around them into following these human practices. By doing so, they were guilty of wicked legalism and of forcing the poor people around them into terrible bondage. Jesus was furious with the actions and teachings of the Pharisees. Time and again, He confronted them with rebukes against their legalistic teachings and man-made laws. In one such encounter, as recorded in Mark 7, Jesus chastised them with the following words, quoting the book of Isaiah, “Howbeit in vain do they worship Me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men” (Mk. 7:7). He went on to say, “Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition” (vs. 9). What a disgrace it would be for Christians to be guilty of living and acting in such a manner as this! In like words, the Lord, in Deuteronomy 4:2 says, “Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the Lord your God which I command you.” Clearly, being guilty of adding to God’s Word through the following of mere man-made tradition and practice is a dire sin indeed! One who obeys, and likewise teaches, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, however, is far from guilty of this charge! Grasping this fact was one of the reasons why I felt compelled to begin this series. Observing how many in Christendom either ignore the Bible’s teachings on this subject or else describe it as archaic and the practice as legalistic and based on mere tradition, was alarming. As I began to study this subject and discover the teachings of God, as well as the teachings and plans of those who hate this beloved doctrine, I began to discover just how far Christendom has wandered from the design of God, that it might follow after the deceptive ways of the enemies of God. It was then, as I began to see the crucial importance of this doctrine to the health and productivity of Christendom, that I set out to formulate this series. From the very beginning, it has been my heart-felt desire to show you not only God’s will and teachings on this topic, but furthermore to express to you just why it is that Christians of the 21st century ought to obey them just as those Christians did in the 1st century or as those Israelites did at the time of Moses.


As stated above, to follow a method or teaching that is based solely on human tradition or outdated practices and then to furthermore force others into following such a lifestyle is a grave sin which the Lord will not take lightly nor overlook. However, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, though first articulated in Moses’ day, is a never-ending commandment of God which is still to be practiced by Christians in our day. To illustrate this fact, what follows is a review and summary of what we learned in the 7 part article on the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood. The following reveals that stay-at-home daughterhood is not only commanded in the Scriptures, but is also described and illustrated in various portions of the Bible. Not only this, but the Lord has also provided us in His Word examples of stay-at-home daughters.

The Roles of Women

At the very beginning of this series was a study of why woman was created-what she was created to do, what her purpose is, what the Lord expects of her, and the roles and responsibilities He has wisely and lovingly given solely to her. In that 4 part study, we determined that woman was given four specific roles-she was to be a helpmeet to man, a mother, a homemaker, and under the authority and protection of man, both prior to and during marriage. This revelation shows us that a woman’s life and roles all center around the home and family which, as presented in part 1 of the article on the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood, reveals to us that young women, as well, are to lead lives which are occupied with duties to home and family. We discovered that as a result of woman’s roles, even if there were no passages in the Holy Scriptures dealing specifically with the issue of stay-at-home daughterhood, we could still deduce that an unmarried daughter’s life is to be like that of a woman at any age-it is to be characterized by ministry and work in the home, for the sake of the family and all others who enter that home.

Numbers 30

Numbers 30 is Old Testament law which deals with the responsibility husbands and fathers have of leading and protecting their wives and daughters. Interestingly, this passage lays forth the responsibility fathers have of diligently protecting and having authority over their daughters until the time those daughters marry. In other words, according to Numbers 30, daughters are to remain at home with their fathers until they marry, at which time they are to be led and protected by their husbands. Crystal clear through the reading of this chapter is that there is no time in a daughter’s life when she is to be off on her own, leading her own life and seeking to protect herself. Daughters are shown to be under the authority and protections of their fathers up until they are transferred to the authority and protection of their husbands. In other words, in Numbers 30, in the very law of God itself, there is no time in which a daughter is to be off on her own. If you would like to study this chapter and the implications thereof, I encourage you to read part 2 of the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood article, which is dedicated solely to the teachings of Numbers 30.

As presented in the article on Numbers 30, while this chapter is indeed Old Testament law, it is nonetheless binding upon New Testament Christians today. There are indeed portions of the Old Testament law which are in no way binding upon today’s Christians, for Christ fulfilled them. An example of these would be the sacrificial law, the ceremonial law, the laws pertaining to feasts, and the various laws pertaining to Sabbaths. Christ was and is the ultimate sacrifice, the forgiver of sins, and the rest for our weary souls. Therefore, these areas of Old Testament law are not binding on New Testament Christians, and those who strive to bind Christians to the following of these laws are being as legalistic as were the Pharisees of Jesus’s time. Numbers 30 and other moral laws, and laws dealing with family dynamics, however, are binding to this very day. And if they are not followed by Christians, those Christians are sadly guilty of disobeying the commands of God.

Sons Leave, Daughters are Given

The Lord also presents stay-at-home daughterhood when, in His Word, sons are described as going out and finding wives of their own, while daughters are said to be given by their fathers in marriage. This is revealed in numerous passages, such as Genesis 28:1, 5-7; 29:1, 19, 24; 34:9. While sons leave the homes of their childhood, that they might search out a wife, daughters are shown to be remaining at home under the protection of their fathers until they give them in marriage. The Bible is replete with examples of this.

Leviticus 22:13 and Other Assorted Passages

As stated previously in this series, there are passages throughout Scripture which state that daughters remain at home with their families until the time of their marriages, one of which is Leviticus 22:13. This passage, which states, “But if the priest’s daughter be a widow, or divorced, and have no child, and is returned unto her father’s house, as in her youth, she shall eat of her father’s meat; but there shall no stranger eat thereof,” shows that it was normative for daughters to remain at home until marriage, as opposed to leading autonomous lifestyles up until marriage. Not only this, but protection of women is so important to our Lord, Who desires for women to never be alone, but to rather be lovingly provided for, that widows commonly returned to the homes of their families following the deaths of their husbands. Examples of this are Ruth and Orpah. Furthermore, women are so dear to the heart of the Lord Jesus Christ that, in the book of John, He commissioned John to care for His mother, Mary, after His death. From that moment on, Mary remained in John’s home, being cared for and protected as Jesus had commanded.

Psalms 45 and 144

In a previous article, these beautiful Psalms were discussed and studied. Psalm 45:10 shows that the royal daughter lived at home with her father until the time of her wedding. Furthermore, verse 13 reveals that in the palace, be that her father’s or her husband’s, she was glorious. She was not some household drudge. No, far from it! She was as the Proverbs 31 woman, who was a glory in her home. Psalm 144:12 presents the role given to each and every unmarried daughter-that of being a polished cornerstone in her father’s home. A daughter is to be preoccupied not with jobs, interests, and duties outside her home; but rather, her main priority is to be her home-she is to work there, minister there, and serve there. That is the glorious sphere which the Lord provided for her, and it is there where she can be glorious. These passages reveal to us the Lord’s will that daughters not only remain at home until marriage, but that they remain fruitful and productive there, ever seeking to strengthen those who enter therein.

1 Corinthians 7:36-38

The idea that stay-at-home daughterhood is taught only in the Old Testament is based upon ignorance and falsehood, for in 1 Corinthians 7:36-38, fathers are given the authority to choose whether they will give their daughters in marriage or keep them (thereby again implying that their daughters are at home with them until marriage). The KJV makes it clear that fathers and daughters are the subjects of these verses, while more modern translations such as the ESV, blur this truth and attempt to present this passage as dealing with people who are betrothed. However, many who staunchly defend the ESV nonetheless admit that the translation and interpretation of verses 36-38 should be understood to be referring to fathers and the authority they have over their daughters.

Examples of Stay-at-home Daughters

Not only does the Lord issue forth commands regarding the lifestyles of unmarried daughters and provide passages illustrating and describing stay-at-home daughterhood, He also places in His Word examples of daughters who remained at home until marriage. Women such as Rebekah, Rachel, and Zipporah, among others, are shown to have been productive, fruitful daughters who worked hard to serve their families and households.

In Conclusion

The purpose of this presentation was to reiterate the fact that stay-at-home daughterhood is presented throughout all of Scripture. Through revealing this to be the case, it should become clear that the main reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so crucially important is because God has commanded and ordained this practice (Num. 30, 1 Cor. 7:36-38, etc.). God alone is all-wise; and therefore, He alone has the wisdom and knowledge to dictate what we are to do in order to flourish and further His Kingdom. We humans often attempt to serve God on our own terms, leading lives not according to God’s laws, but rather according to what we want to do. This, however, cannot accurately be deemed service. If we desire to advance the Kingdom of God and its causes, then we must live and serve on His terms and according to His design. It is therefore crucial that we unearth the long lost practice of stay-at-home daughterhood and once again live according to the dictates of God’s Word alone. When we do so, we may be surprised as to just how fruitfully we are able to serve the Lord and advance His dominion on this earth! We have an exciting opportunity before us-an opportunity to advance Christ’s Kingdom in amazing and exciting ways. To do so, however, we must live not according to what our goals may be or what the world expects of us. We must pattern our lives according to God’s unchanging Word and it alone. The question is-will Christendom be willing to give up the ways of the world, that they might serve and glorify Christ on His terms rather than our own? It is my prayer that this will be the case, both for the sake of the Lord and His Kingdom and for that of the world to which we are called to minister!

Upcoming Articles in the Stay-at-home Daughterhood Article Series

While the stay-at-home daughterhood article series is already comprised of 14 articles, many more are currently in the works and will be posted in the near future, at the rate of, Lord willing, one per week. It is my desire in this current post to share with you what you can expect to see addressed in this series in the near future. My hope is that you will continue to read and ponder the previous articles, diligently search and study the Holy Scriptures, and pray that the Lord would open your eyes to the glories of His truths. What follows is a tentative listing of the future articles in the stay-at-home daughterhood article series, provided here for you that you might prepare for the reading thereof through Bible study and prayer.



Lord willing, a new article will be posted on each subsequent Friday beginning April 23. The topics that will soon be covered include the following:




“What’s the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God”


This article, which will be posted in 2, perhaps 3, parts, will delve into the issue of why stay-at-home daughterhood should even be pondered so deeply or discussed at such length in our day. For many, stay-at-home daughterhood is viewed as an archaic, out of date concept which is of no importance or relevance to us today. Nothing, however, could be further from the truth. Stay-at-home daughterhood is of just as much importance and relevance now as it was in the days in which it was written of in the Holy Scriptures. In some ways, it is of even more importance today, in an age in which feminism has so thoroughly and pervasively influenced each and every aspect of society, the most evident of which may perhaps be the home and family. In this article, I will work to reveal just why it is so important to ponder the implications of stay-at-home daughterhood and to work to carefully and diligently put its principles into practice. This portion of the article series may be very eye-opening!




“Feminist Fury: Why Feminism Despises Stay-at-home Daughterhood and How it is Attempting to Destroy It"


The concept of stay-at-home daughterhood is not only a sorely misunderstood one today, but is one which is severely hated and disdained. The question is, “Why?” Why is stay-at-home daughterhood so actively and staunchly hated by feminists of all backgrounds and belief systems? Feminists want you to believe that their rejection of stay-at-home daughterhood is due to their being afraid that such a lifestyle would enslave young women, keeping them from realizing and reaching their full potential, barring them from the opportunity to be highly educated, preventing them from having a positive impact on the world, and exposing them to abuse and perpetual childhood. However, when one studies the true history of the feminist movement, what is uncovered is that these are not the actual reasons for the feminist rejection of stay-at-home daughterhood. They are simply the reasons which feminists would have us to believe, so as to prevent us from fully understanding the roots of their disdain for Biblical daughterhood. In this article, which may very well be posted in numerous parts, you will be exposed to the true history and background of feminism and will come to understand just why it is that feminism not only dislikes stay-at-home daughterhood, but thoroughly and ruthlessly hates it. What you learn may surprise you!



“Industry and Commerce: Studying the Issue of Work and Whether or Not a Stay-at-home Daughter Should be Involved in Such Endeavors”


Does this title catch your interest? It should! This article, which, like others, will likely be posted in several installments, will cover such topics as:


• What is work? What is its Biblical definition?


• Is it Biblical for stay-at-home daughters to work? If so, what kind of work should they do?


• Biblically speaking, is it lawful for a stay-at-home daughter to work outside the home?


• Is a father required by God to provide financially for his adult daughters?


• How can a daughter, in a Biblical fashion, contribute to the economy and financial well-being of her family?


• What is a home business? Did women in the Bible own home businesses? How does a daughter go about beginning a home business? What are some practical options for the daughter who desires to begin a home business?


I hope that this will serve as a very helpful and practical article and that it will answer many of today’s common questions regarding the life of the Biblical stay-at-home daughter.




“What About College and Higher Education?”


A common misconception is that stay-at-home daughters, by being dedicated to remaining at home with their parents until marriage, are prevented from acquiring an extensive, in-depth education. Nothing could be further from the truth. In this article, I will seek to expose the lies of our culture which say that in order to be successful and productive, one must go to college. I will also work to reveal the many reasons why it is not only unwise for a young woman to be sent to college, but that in so doing, a daughter is actually hindered from acquiring a truly high education. I will also point out examples from history of women who never set foot on a college campus but are, still to this day, widely known for being erudite and for possessing a lofty intellect and knowledge. We will study the topic of where true knowledge comes from, and will also discover the ways in which colleges and universities-including many leading Christian ones!-are being overrun by humanists (as well as the religion of Islam!) who are diligently seeking to indoctrinate students in the lies of humanism. The topic of why college campuses are so dangerous will also be covered. Do not miss this article, as it is crucially important, for a young woman’s education is crucially important. While Christians commonly fail to understand this, humanists grasp the truth well-our educations will either prepare us to serve others and further Christ’s Kingdom, or else will furnish us for the task of furthering the Adversary’s plans and schemes.




“What About Ministry?”


There are those who hold to the belief that if a daughter remains at home until marriage, she will be unable to further the Kingdom of God through Christian ministry to lost and hurting souls. This is an entirely false idea. This article will cover such issues as the following:


• What about overseas ministry?


• What if an unmarried daughter feels called to leave home in order to minister in a foreign country or different state?


• How do the Scriptures present the topic of ministry? Through what spheres did God ordain ministry to take place?


• Who is called to Christian ministry?


• What ministry options are open to the Biblically-minded stay-at-home daughter?


This will undoubtedly be a rather controversial article, but one must not shrink away from the controversial when God’s Word and the furthering of His Kingdom are what is at stake.




“What is a Stay-at-home Daughter to Do?”


Common is the view that stay-at-home daughters are chained to the home and lead lives of little use or productive importance. The belief is that such daughters are either couch potatoes or that they are having little positive impact on the world through their homemaking, cooking, and sewing. Both notions are false. In this article, which will be comprised of several parts, we will discuss what a Biblical stay-at-home daughter’s life is to look like. Now, the lives of all stay-at-home daughters are not going to look the same, nor should they. Stay-at-home daughterhood is not about faithfully filling some cookie cutter shape. Rather, it is about taking the principles of God’s Word and putting them into practice in one’s day-to-day life. Topics covered will be the importance of developing close relationships with siblings, serving the church, strengthening the household, serving and honoring parents, learning and putting into practice various homemaking skills, reaching out to the community, and more. As you will undoubtedly see, the stay-at-home daughter who lives her life according to the Bible and the priorities it places upon her, will not only live a full, fulfilling life at home, but will also be highly productive and happy. We will be joined in this article study by my dear mother, who will, via interview, speak on what she has learned regarding the importance of learning homemaking skills and preparing for a life of being a wife, mother, and homemaker from an early age. We will also likely be joined by my father, as well, in an interview on the topic of how a daughter can help, encourage, strengthen, and serve her father and his household.




“Stay-at-home Daughterhood Exaggerated”


Perhaps the most common reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so hated in our day, is that there is a popular misconception abounding which says that stay-at-home daughters are retarded in their growth into adulthood by remaining at home. The belief is that they are somehow forced into a life of meaningless, perpetual childhood. While this may be true in some families, it is not the truth for the majority of stay-at-home daughters in the West and is by no means faithful to Biblical family dynamics. In this article, I will address the problem of exaggerating the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood into something it was never meant by God to be. I will also state that we must refrain from basing our beliefs, on the topic of Biblical daughterhood, upon the sinful practices of others.




“Representing Stay-at-home Daughterhood Well”


In our day, a faithful and Biblical stay-at-home daughter is a pioneer in every sense of the word. She is blazing a trail back to the “old paths, where is the good way” (Jere. 6:16). Though we live in an age when many stay-at-home daughters experience disdain and ridicule from family and friends who disagree with their lifestyle, this is not a mere discouraging and frustrating time to live. No, far from it! For the Biblically-minded, visionary stay-at-home daughter, this is a most exciting time to live! We, as 21st century stay-at-home daughters, have the unique opportunity to lead the Church, by example and through faithfulness to God, back to His life-changing Word. The intent of this article is to be an encouragement to stay-at-home daughters and to provide for them a vision of the exciting opportunities open to them to be a dominion-minded, fruitful pioneer. This article will also address ways in which a stay-at-home daughter can Biblically represent the doctrine and practice of stay-at-home daughterhood well. Common failures committed by daughters which cause others to disdain the practice of stay-at-home daughterhood will also be addressed.




“Dealing with Difficulties: Living Biblically in an UnBiblical World”


In some ways, this may prove to be one of the most helpful articles of this entire series. Undoubtedly, there are many daughters out there who come from less than perfect family situations who are frustrated and discouraged because they want to fulfill the stay-at-home daughterhood model found in the Bible but think such to be impossible given the way in which their family currently operates. While I by no means have all the answers, it is my desire to, by God’s grace, be of help to daughters who may find themselves in hard times and discouraging circumstances. Difficulties addressed in this article, which will consist of several parts, include the following:


• “I know that, Biblically speaking, my father has the responsibility to lead, protect, and provide for me until he gives me in marriage. However, my father does not understand this, and desires to release me to be on my own once I turn 18. What hope do I have? What should I do?”


• “As a young woman of God, I know that my calling is to serve my father’s household, to actively work at home, and to be a true polished cornerstone there. My father desires for me to work outside the home, though. What should I do?”


• “My father wants me to have the experience of going to college, but the thought scares me. I prefer to further my education at home. I want to honor my father, but I also want to be faithful to what I believe the Lord wants me to do. What should I do in this situation?”


• “My father wants me to remain at home until marriage, but I don’t want to! What should I do?”


• And much more!


Again, I do not have all the answers, nor do I pretend to. However, I do believe that there are certain Biblical principles by which daughters in difficult situations can, through following them, have joy and, by God’s grace, live in a Biblical manner. I pray that this article will bring much joy, encouragement, and vision to young women, and that through it, they may gain the ability to faithfully persevere.




Interviews


Once the various articles themselves have been posted, an assortment of interviews will follow. I believe that these will be a great blessing to you, and will serve to encourage you to faithfully follow in the ways of God. Interviews will be conducted with various young women such as Miss Jocelyn Dixon from the “A Pondering Heart” blog and Feelin’ Feminine, Miss Jasmine Baucham of “Joyfully at Home”, sisters Breezy and Emily Rose Brookshire, and sisters Claudia and Blair Brown.




Giveaways


The stay-at-home daughterhood article series will culminate in an assortment of giveaways of Biblical books, CDs, and DVDs, all on the topic of Biblical daughterhood. You won’t want to miss these opportunities to acquire various encouraging, edifying resources!




In Conclusion


As you can see, the stay-at-home daughterhood article series is far from complete! Beginning Friday, April 23, a new article in the series will, Lord willing, be posted each Friday. Please spread the word about this series and pray that the Lord would open your eyes to the truths of His Word.


God bless you!

Sheltered? Yes, Please!

Among the most popular objections to stay-at-home daughterhood which abound today, is that daughters who remain at home until marriage are too sheltered. Is this a worthy claim? What is meant by this accusation? What does it truly mean to be sheltered? Should a young woman who is remaining in her father’s home until marriage be sheltered? Answering these questions and more will be the object of this next article in the stay-at-home daughterhood series.

The Accusation

Fathers who are dedicated to leading and protecting their unmarried daughters until the day in which they give them in marriage, are often accused of sheltering their poor daughters. The implication is that they are locking their daughters away at home, preventing them from having the ability to know what goes on in the world about them and disallowing them from impacting that world in any way. The idea is that somehow those daughters are slaves, chained away in the dark recesses of the home, who are unable to step out into the great blue yonder which abounds outside the four walls of their “cage”. The accusers harbor the notion that somehow these daughters are uneducated in current events, unable to socialize with people outside the home, prevented from extending a hand of ministry and help to those outside, and are living a life which is empty, useless, and terribly, terribly sheltered. There are no doubt households which function in this manner under the iron fist of a dictator-father and who mask their family dynamics with the title “stay-at-home daughterhood”. However, this lifestyle, which is indeed completely unbiblical, cannot be accurately termed as a condition of the daughters being “sheltered”. In fact, the accusation stems from an inherent misunderstanding of this basic word.

The Blessing of Shelter

In his 1828 American Dictionary of the English Language, Mr. Noah Webster describes the word shelter with the following meanings (the first three describing the word when used as a noun, the following ones describing the verb usage):

1. That which covers or defends from injury or annoyance. A house is a shelter from rain and other inclemencies of the weather; the foliage of a tree is a shelter from the rays of the sun.

2. The state of being covered and protected; protection; security

3. He that defends or guards from danger; a protector


4. To cover from violence, injury, annoyance or attack; as a valley sheltered from the north wind by a mountain.


5. To defend; to protect from danger; to secure or render safe; to harbor


6. To betake to cover or a safe place


7. To cover from notice; to disguise for protection


Mr. Webster goes on to describe the word “sheltered” in these words, “Covered from injury or annoyance; defended; protected”. This sounds like a good thing, even a merciful blessing, does it not?



When I think of shelter, what comes to mind is the same scenario as one of those Mr. Webster mentioned. Imagine that you are driving down a strange road, lost in a densely wooded, unfamiliar area, when a thunderstorm suddenly strikes. Torrential downpours, deafening thunder, and scary, electrifying lightening plague you as you strive to continue on your journey. Trying to find a familiar road, you seek ever harder to find your way home. Tired, scared, and terribly hungry, you discover that you will be unable to reach home this night. As fear and uncertainty begin to mount in your heart, a beautiful bed and breakfast suddenly comes into view. You joyfully park your car, and with thanksgiving ringing in the depths of your heart, you bound up the stairs to the inviting front door of the dwelling. Greeted by a warm, cheerful, hospitable face, you are quickly welcomed into the warm abode, ever so comforted by this beautiful shelter. This, dear reader, is the true definition of a shelter. By being sheltered in this home, you are not being blinded to the current events outside the door. You know very well what is taking place outside in the storm-this is the precise reason why you were seeking shelter! You were in a dangerous, destructive world in need of shelter and safety, and when such shelter was offered to you, you eagerly accepted it as a precious gift.

As it pertains to the Biblical practice of stay-at-home daughterhood, being truly sheltered does not mean that you are locked away in your father’s home, uneducated about the ways of the world. Rather, you know all too well the destructive lies and immoral practices of the world, and it is for this reason that you are so thankful for the shelter with which this home affords you. A Biblical stay-at-home daughter is discipled in the ways of Christ by her parents, who strive to teach her the Biblical worldview. Not only this, but they also teach her the lies of the pagan, evil worldviews espoused by many in the world and proceed to equip her with an education which strengthens her with a defense against pervading, unbiblical teachings. Furthermore, she is not “sheltered” in the sense that she is unaware of the vile immorality which takes place in the outside world. Rather, she is protected from those immoral influences and is taught by her parents and by the Holy Spirit, through her reading of the Word, about these various acts of immorality, why they are wrong and dishonoring to the Lord, how they harm those who commit such acts, how to guard against committing them herself, etc. Likewise, a stay-at-home daughter who is operating according to Biblical standards by no means lends a deaf ear and a blind eye to the current events of the day. Far from it! Instead, she understands that as a child of God, it is her duty to be well educated in the events of the day, that she might be able to further the dominion of Christ and fulfill her duty to make disciples. True stay-at-home daughters seek to become highly educated in aspects of history and theology, that they might be able to wage war against the schemes of the Devil, proclaim to others the truth of God and the lies of Satan, sound the alarm of what will happen if the world continues on in its sinfulness and depravity, and much more. In other words, she is nothing like the caricature which those who disdain Biblical daughterhood attempt to paint her as. Instead, she represents her father and his ways well, and joyfully submits to the role God ordained specifically for her, being a truly radiant, intelligent polished corner stone (Ps. 144:112b). When her antagonists attempt to label her as a poor sheltered young woman, she lives out 1 Peter 3:16, which says, “Having a good conscience; that whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.”

In Conclusion

The word “sheltered” is today widely misrepresented, completely misunderstood, and terribly misused. Those who disdain stay-at-home daughterhood claim the word in their attempts to paint this doctrine in the most dire of terms. In doing so, however, they unwittingly refute their own arguments. For, while stay-at-home daughters are not sheltered in the way in which many today claim, they are nonetheless blessedly sheltered (in the true sense of the word!), which is one of the very reasons why they are dedicated to remaining at home. As a bed and breakfast shelters a lost and weary soul from the raging thunderstorm outdoors, so does a father’s home shelter unmarried daughters from the rape, abuse, deception, harassment, murder, unbiblical teachings, sly stalkers and much more which abound in the world. That, dear reader, is the true meaning of being sheltered. And praise the Lord for it!








Footnote



1. Noah Webster, American Dictionary of the English Language (reprinted by Foundation for American Christian Education, 1995)

A Father's Home-A Daughter's Shelter

What follows is the next article in the stay-at-home daughterhood series. If you have not had the opportunity to read the previous articles, please click here and do so now before continuing on with this one. Thank you! :)

~~~~~~~~~

One of the often overlooked blessings of remaining at home-and one of the precise reasons why the Lord has ordained the practice of unmarried daughters remaining under their father’s roof-is the physical and emotional protection which that sphere affords to unmarried daughters. In our day, it is by no means uncommon for daughters to be off on their own-be that at school, work, or one’s own dwelling place-forming relationships with one young man after another, oftentimes without the father’s knowledge or oversight. This is contrary to God’s Word and therefore very dangerous on many levels. When daughters are left alone with young men, emotions tend to flare and one thing leads to another. Meanwhile, there is no one to protect the young woman or to keep her from making hasty, sinful decisions in a moment of passion. It is for this reason that the Lord has commanded fathers to actively preserve and guard their daughters’ purity, in their homes, until they give them in marriage.

Deuteronomy 22:13-21

This passage and others similar to it express the fact that God has issued to fathers the all-important duty of guarding their daughter’s purity-body, mind, and heart. While daughters are responsible for the way in which they act, fathers are to protect them from any endangering situations, people, or places. They are not to send their daughters off on their own, admonishing them to guard their hearts and save their bodies for their future husbands. While they should daily impress the importance of doing these things to their daughters, it is their responsibility, as fathers, to take an active role in diligently guarding them from anyone and anything which would seek to deprive them of the blessed gift of their purity. This includes forbidding them from watching vile television programs, not allowing them to forge friendships with those who are living in a manner which is in direct disobedience to God’s Word, and creating any ground rules necessary for the preservation of their purity. Fathers are not “let off the hook” by God when something occurs which compromises their daughter’s chastity. Far from it! Rather, the Lord holds fathers to a high standard and bestows upon them a high and lofty responsibility-the responsibility of guarding, protecting, and leading their daughters under their roof until the day they give them in marriage. This is the teaching of Deuteronomy 22:13-21 and other like passages. Now that we have laid the groundwork for our study of this portion of Scripture, we can delve into it and study the implications thereof.

Verses 13-21 speak of a situation in which a father gave his daughter to a young man in marriage, claiming that she was indeed a virgin. Sadly, the groom later has reason to believe that this claim was not accurate, and that she had rather lived an impure, unchaste life. The groom goes to her parents in the hopes that they can, in some way, prove to him that his suspicions are groundless and that she has indeed known no other man. If, unfortunately, it becomes known that his accusations were true, and this young woman did indeed give away her purity to another man prior to marriage then the guilty bride was to be stoned.


Now, before we proceed, allow me to make it clear that I am not advocating the stoning of daughters who have given away their virginity prior to marriage! Some may wonder why this is, seeing as how stoning the guilty party was the law. First, this was a law issued to ancient Israel. Second, Jesus, in a sense, abolished this law with his coming. John : - recounts the time when a woman was found to be committing adultery. She was brought before the to be stoned, as the Old Testament Law dictated. Jesus, being in the midst of the crowd about to stone her to death, calls for the attacker who was sinless to cast the first stone. Obviously, not one of them could claim to have no sin, and so one by one, they went home. Finally, only Jesus and the adulteress remained. She marvels that those who were to stone her had departed. He proclaims that He no longer , but that she is to go and sin no more. Therefore, while the passage in Deuteronomy we will be studying today is helpful and provides us with much wisdom and insight into a father’s role, the stoning aspect of this verse is not to be followed through by us today.


Having said this, let us continue on with this passage. First, notice in verse 15 that it is the young woman’s parents who were responsible for providing tokens of her purity. This is because they are to be watching over her, training her in ways of righteousness, involved in her life and knowing the state of her purity and guarding it with all their might.


Second, note in verse 21 where it was she was to be stoned. Was it at the place where she committed her sin of fornication? No-she was to be stoned at “the door of her father’s house”. Why is this? The reason is that it was the father’s duty to guard his daughter and her purity and to be actively involved in her life, that she might not find herself in a compromising situation. While the daughter is guilty for committing the sin (as is shown through her death), the father is disgraced for not fully preserving his daughter’s purity (as is shown in the stoning occurring at his home-the sphere which is to be a place of protection for daughters). Now, clearly, daughters will at times reject and rebel against their father’s authority and protection, leaving the father with little he can do to prevent her from committing an act of impurity. But this verse shows unequivocally that the father is held responsible to guard his daughter from any debilitating influences and entanglements with young men, so as to guard her purity. He has the responsibility of presenting his daughter to a husband as a pure, radiant virgin. This is his task, and this is why his home is to be her place of shelter until he gives her in marriage. Fathers rejecting their duty and instead releasing their daughters to the world to be on their own spells disaster. For, one of the greatest benefits of remaining at home until marriage is the protection it provides against defiling temptation, male predators, and sinful actions which daughters would one day greatly regret. When a daughter is alone with friends or perhaps with just one young man, without the protection of her father, it can be so easy for her to give in to flirting, fleshly desires, and actions which she would otherwise never dream of doing. How appealing the world and its ways can look when off on your own! This is precisely what Mr. Henry was saying when he wrote, “See what came of Dinah’s gadding: young women must learn to be chaste, keepers at home; these properties are put together, Tit. 2:5, for those that are not keepers at home expose their chastity. Dinah went abroad to look about her; but, if she had looked about her as she ought, she would not have fallen into this snare.”1 He wrote furthermore, ““Dinah, when she went to see the daughters of the land, lost her chastity. Those whose home is their prison, it is to be feared, feel that their chastity is their fetters.”2

Exodus 22:16-17

To further emphasize a father’s role to protect his daughter, we will now turn to Exodus 22. In verses 16 and 17, we read of a situation in which a young man tempts a young woman and lies with her. Notice whom he has to answer to for his sin: her father. Now, clearly, he ultimately has God to answer to; earthly speaking, however, he must answer to her father, for he is the one in charge of her and given the duty to preserve her purity. The young man must attempt to make things right with him and do what he says, whether that be to marry her or simply pay a dowry price for her. Again, we see illustrated the fact that fathers are the ones vested with the task of protecting their daughters-body, mind, and heart.

In Conclusion

You see, daughters are not called on to remain at home until marriage because God has some evil desire to lock them up and not allow them to see the light of day. Nor are they to be there so that they might be deprived of the opportunity to use their gifts or advance the cause of Christ. Rather, God has placed them in the sphere of home that they might be protected and guarded against the wicked, wretched influences and people which desire to destroy them. If you are a daughter with a father who actively seeks to guard your purity, praise God for that tremendous blessing! Do not ever take that for granted. Sadly, many girls today do not have a father like that. If you are a daughter whose father is not interested in the least in protecting you and your purity, take heart! Pray that the Lord would change your father; you never know what the Lord may do in his heart! He works miracles even in our day; with God, all things are possible!



Footnotes

1. Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible (Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., 2991) pg. 73


2. Ibid, pg. 2370

The Biblical Case for Stay-at-home Daughterhood Part 7

During the past couple weeks, we have had the privilege of studying the accounts of various stay-at-home daughters as featured in the Holy Scriptures, including Rebekah, Zipporah, and Rachel. While there are many stay-at-home daughters mentioned in the Bible, I am aware of only one account in the entire Bible of a young woman who went out on her own, void of her father’s protection. This example is by no means a positive one, either. As a result of this daughter’s actions, shame and reproach came upon her family. Rather than serving as a polished cornerstone in her father’s home, she was a disgrace who brought disaster upon her entire family line, through the simple act of going off on her own, likely unbeknownst to her father. This example I speak of is that of Jacob and Leah’s daughter, Dinah, as recorded in Genesis 34.

Dinah's Disgrace

We read, in Genesis 34:1, “And Dinah the daughter of Leah, which she bare unto Jacob, went out to see the daughters of the land.” Interestingly, this venture of Dinah’s was likely not even a going out to live alone. She was probably not intending to begin a new life during her unmarried years, living on her own. Various commentators, as well as the great historian, Josephus, comment that Dinah’s reason for going out independently was most likely in order to visit the girls of the land with the intention of learning from and attending a feast or ball with them.

Not only did she leave the protection of her father’s home in order to go out on her own and pursue her own plans, she likely did so without her father’s knowledge or permission. If she had simply been openly communicating with her father as we see daughters doing in Numbers 30, this likely would not have happened. Oh the dangerous, destructive binds we can find ourselves in when we do not seek our father’s wise counsel, authority, and advice!


In verse one we read of Dinah’s leaving her father’s home. Trouble is by no means slow in arriving, for in the very next verse, we read that Shechem, the son of Hamor, “saw her, took her, and lay with her, and defiled her.” Some believe that Shechem raped Dinah, while there are others who claim that the relationship was a consensual one. I happen to think that in this context, the phrase "took her" may very well support the view held by those who believe it was rape. Either way, this was a terribly wicked act of sin-one that could have been avoided had Dinah remained at home or had the protection of her father or older brothers when she went on her venture. Sadly, however, she rejected the protection offered by her home and family, and the result was a tragic one. If this were the end of the story, it would be proof enough of the dire importance of daughters remaining under the protection of their fathers. Unfortunately, however, this is not where the story ends-it gets much, much worse.



Shechem desired to marry Dinah, and in the following verses, he appeals to his father as well as Dinah’s family, to allow him to wed her. In verses 14 through 24, we read that, because Shechem was outside the covenant community and not one of God’s chosen people, Dinah’s family would not give her to him unless he, too, were circumcised. Shechem and his people agreed to this condition and proceeded to be circumcised. Shechem was joyful, for he believed that Dinah’s brothers would hold up their end of the deal, and he would soon be married to Dinah. However, we discover in verses 13, 25, and following that all along, Jacob’s sons had had no intention whatever to give Dinah to Shechem as wife. Verses 25-30 add insult to injury and plunge Jacob’s family into an even deeper abyss of sadness and destruction. Jacob’s sons, Simeon and Levi, slew with the sword Shechem, Hamor, and all the men of their land. They went on to spoil the entire city in vengeance and stole all their possessions-their money, children, wives, and animals-taking them, as it were, prisoner. Verse 30 of this chapter is just as tragic as the first two verses, if not more so: “And Jacob said to Simeon and Levi, ‘Ye have troubled me to make me to stink among the inhabitants of the land, among the Canaanites and the Perizzites: and I being few in number, they shall gather themselves together against me, and slay me; and I shall be destroyed, I and my house.”


Genesis 34 is filled with one tragic event after another. Dinah is defiled and robbed of her virginity, Simeon and Levi murder countless men and take their possessions as plunder, and now Jacob’s entire family line is ruined, hated, and in danger of being completely destroyed. What could have possibly been the root of this mayhem and caused this distruction? The seemingly little act of Dinah, an unmarried young woman, leaving her father’s house, void of his protection, counsel, and leadership. Granted, Shechem is certainly to blame for sinning against Dinah; he was by no means a saint and was in dire need of self-control! Likewise, Simeon and Levi were to blame for the horrible ravaging they committed against Shechem and his land. However, it is highly unlikely that any of this would have occurred, had Dinah remained under the protection of her father, in the sphere God had so wisely and lovingly designed for her, rather than shunning it and going off on her own.




Consider the following words of Matthew Poole, a Puritan from the 17th century:

“From her father’s house into the city, out of curiosity, there being then, as Josephus reports, a great concourse of people to a feast. Thus she put herself out of her father’s protection, and merely out of a vain humour exposed both herself and others to temptation; which was the worse, because it was amongst them that had no fear of God to restrain them from the most enormous crimes. She was now fourteen or fifteen years old.”1

Likewise, consider these words from well-known Bible commentator Matthew Henry:

“Dinah was, for aught that appears, Jacob’s only daughter, and we may suppose her therefore the mother’s fondling and the darling of the family, and yet she proves neither a joy nor a credit to them; for those children seldom prove either the best or the happiest that are most indulged. She is reckoned now but fifteen or sixteen years of age when she here occasioned so much mischief. Observe, 1. Her vain curiosity, which exposed her. She went out, perhaps unknown to her father, but by the connivance of her mother, to see the daughters of the land (v. 1); probably it was at a ball, or on some public day. Being an only daughter, she thought herself solitary at home, having none of her own age and sex to converse with; and therefore she must needs go abroad to divert herself, to keep off melancholy, and to accomplish herself by conversation better than she could in her father’s tents. Note, It is a very good thing for children to love home; it is parents’ wisdom to make it easy to them, and children’s duty then to be easy in it. Her pretence was to see the daughters of the land, to see how they dressed, and how they danced, and what was fashionable among them. She went to see, yet that was not all, she went to be seen too; she went to see the daughters of the land, but, it may be, with some thoughts of the sons of the land too. Note, The pride and vanity of young people betray them into many snares. 2. The loss of her honour by this means (v. 2); Shechem, the prince of the country, but a slave to his own lusts, took her, and lay with her, it should seem, not so much by force as by surprise. Note, Great men think they may do any thing; and what more mischievous than untaught and ungoverned youth? See what came of Dinah’s gadding: young women must learn to be chaste, keepers at home; these properties are put together, Tit. 2:5, for those that are not keepers at home expose their chastity. Dinah went abroad to look about her; but, if she had looked about her as she ought, she would not have fallen into this snare. Note, The beginning of sin is as the letting forth of water. How great a matter does a little fire kindle!”2

“Dinah, when she went to see the daughters of the land, lost her chastity. Those whose home is their prison, it is to be feared, feel that their chastity is their fetters.”3

Behold all the disastrous consequences that can follow when daughters go against God’s all-wise, ordained design of stay-at-home daughterhood and forsake the protection of their fathers!

Deuteronomy 22:27-A Tragic Situation

 

The biography of Dinah is, sadly, so very similar to that of the young woman mentioned in Deuteronomy 22:27. This is a heart-breaking passage that causes me to praise the Lord for the protection which my parents’ home affords me. This verse states, “For he found her in the field, and the betrothed damsel cried, and there was none to save her.” In the two verses which proceed this one, a law is laid down by God as to how a man should be treated who comes across a maiden alone in a field and proceeds to rape her. Notice the condition of helplessness in verse 27-and there was none to save her. It should be crystal clear why God has commanded fathers to care for, lead, and protect their unmarried daughters in their homes until they give them in marriage. Our God is desiring to save these young women from the horrific situation in which young woman in verse 27 found herself. Yet, in our day, those both inside and outside the Church are ever so intent upon breaking down the foundations of stay-at-home daughterhood, in the hopes of destroying this beloved doctrine and preventing young ladies from following in the footsteps thereof. This is simply unthinkable at best and downright hateful at worst. May we in Christendom who have shunned this doctrine repent of our folly, and realize the guilt we have when we push young women from their protective homes and families out into a dog-eat-dog world!

 

And so it Continues to This Day....

 

The account of Dinah, as well as the one addressed in Deuteronomy 22, are by no means archaic. The problem of unprotected, independent women being harassed is even more common in our day, in a time when the majority of today’s women are away on a college campus or in the workplace. Likewise, I addressed, in a previous article, the account of a 15 year old girl who was raped and abused at a school dance, with no one stepping in to protect or defend her. Consider, for example, the following horrific  statistics:

 

• 
  
   A college survey conducted by the National Victim Center reported that one in four college women have been raped or suffered attempted rape (Bureau of Justice, 1992).4
• 
  
   Approximately 32% of college students are victims of domestic violence5
• 
  
  While in college, 50 - 75% of women are sexually harassed, and 20 to 30% of college women report being sexually harassed by a professor6
• 
  
   Fifteen percent of all female violent crimes were committed while the victim was working or on duty.7
• 
  
   Approximately 36,500 rapes and sexual assaults occur annually in the workplace. In 80 percent of these incidents, the victim was female.8
  

This is tragic! And yet, in our day, if you are an adult woman and not on a college campus or busying yourself in the workplace, you are viewed as old-fashioned, unfulfilled, and strange. Is it any wonder that, in Numbers 30, the Lord commands fathers to protect and lead their unmarried daughters at home until they give them in marriage?

In Conclusion

 

The Holy Scriptures are replete with accounts of stay-at-home daughters. Interestingly, there is precisely one account-only one!- in the Bible that I am aware of which speaks of a daughter going off on her own. This example is by no means a positive nor praiseworthy one. I believe that, through it, the Lord is issuing forth to us a grave warning of the destruction that can-and so often does-take place when unmarried young women are sent off to be on their own-be that at a college dorm or in one’s own dwelling place, pursuing a career in the workforce.

Prevailing among Christendom today is the idea that the Bible speaks not to the issue of where unmarried young women should live. Others believe that if it does speak to this issue, it is simply by way of suggestion or the issuance of a good idea, or perhaps through some archaic, done-away-with command. However, this is clearly not the case. The Scriptures provide us with example after example of stay-at-home daughters, verses pertaining to stay-at-home daughterhood, and commands addressing the issue of where unmarried daughters are to live. In addition, we are provided with only one example of a daughter who forsook the protection of her father. If the Lord were indifferent as to where an unmarried woman lives, then He would have provided for us in His Word positive, heart-warming, good examples of unmarried daughters leaving their families and living on their own. However, this is simply not what we find in the Scriptures-and I believe we know precisely why this is!






Footnotes


1. Matthew Poole, Matthew Poole’s Commentary on the Holy Bible Vol. 1 (Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., 2008) pg. 77


2. Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry’s Commentary on the Whole Bible (Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., 1991) pg. 73


3. Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry’s Commentary on the Whole Bible (Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., 1991) pg. 2370


4. http://www.aaets.org/article135.htm


5. http://www.feministcampus.org/fmla/printable-materials/v-day05/violence_against_women.pdf


6. Ibid.


7. http://www.aflcio.org/issues/jobseconomy/women/violence.cfm


8. Ibid.

The Biblical Case for Stay-at-home Daughterhood Part 6

Last time, we had the opportunity to study the life of Rebekah from Genesis 24. We discovered that not only was she a stay-at-home daughter, but she was also certainly deserving of the title “polished cornerstone”, due to her godly service and productivity in her father’s home. We studied Leviticus 22:13, as well, and learned that not only is stay-at-home daughterhood normative in the Scriptures, but God also outlined a system by which abandoned women who had lost their husbands would also be cared for and protected.



Today, we will study the lives of numerous other stay-at-home daughters. Before we do so, however, I want us to quickly learn from the lives of sisters-in-law Ruth and Orpah, whose stories also clearly outline the order described in Leviticus 22:13-the practice of divorced or widowed women returning to live with family members.

Ruth and Orpah

In Ruth 1:5, we read that both Ruth’s husband, as well as Orpah’s, died while they were living in Moab. In verse 8, their mother-in law, Naomi, admonishes them to, “Go, return each to her mother’s house: the Lord deal kindly with you, as ye have dealt with the dead, and with me.” Noteworthy is the fact that, following the death of their husbands, Ruth and Orpah were told to return to live with their families. Why would this be if they had not been living there up until the time they married? If they had been on their own as daughters today are, then they would simply return to that lifestyle. Clearly, as in the examples given in Leviticus 22:13 and Genesis 38:11, daughters not only remained with their families until marriage, but they also returned to their family’s dwelling after the death of their husbands. At no time were they out on their own, independent from the protection, oversight, and provision of their parents.

This continuity in Scripture continues on through the account of Ruth and Orpah. In verse 15 of Ruth 1, we discover that Orpah has indeed chosen to return to her childhood home. Ruth, however, no longer desires the false gods of Moab and has no desire to return to her childhood home, for she now knew the one true God and desired to be with His people. So, what did she do? Did she decide to purchase her own dwelling, begin a career, and live on her own? By no means! Rather than going to live with her parents in the pagan city of Moab, she desired to follow her mother-in-law, Naomi, as she returned to the godly city of Bethlehem (verses 16-17), and to take up residence with her there. So, we see that neither Ruth nor Orpah lived a solitary life following the deaths of their husbands. Orpah went to her mother’s house, and Ruth went to live with her mother-in-law.


This account represents not only the existence of the deep love and care which the Lord has for women who have lost their husbands, but also makes clear the design of stay-at-home daughterhood which God has set forth. It is a beautiful illustration of the glories of God’s wisdom and grace in providing women with a safeguard and means of protection and care. As I’ve expressed before, what a loving and caring God we serve!




Now let us turn to a study of the lives of other stay-at-home daughters mentioned in the Bible!

Rachel

We are first introduced to Rachel in Genesis 29, when Jacob arrives at her father Laban’s home. Previously, in chapter 28, we read of Jacob leaving (again, sons leave, but daughters are given!) home to find a wife among the household of Bethuel. Genesis 29:9 makes it clear that Rachel is residing at home, caring daily for her father’s sheep. She, being a grown woman, not only lived at home with her father (verses 9, 12, and 19), but was also diligent in making him and his household productive and fruitful. She was under the care of her father, caring for his sheep, until the time of her marriage. Rachel, like Rebekah, was clearly a stay-at-home daughter who worked with a servant’s heart to further the assets and industry of her household. She, too, served as a polished cornerstone!

Leah

Next in our list of stay-at-home daughters mentioned in the Bible, we come to Rachel’s sister, Leah. Leah was older than Rachel, but due to the fact that she was yet unmarried, she was dwelling in her father’s house along with her younger sister (as is made clear by verse 23; note-by referencing this verse, I am intending to simply show the fact that Leah was at home with her father; I do not, however, approve of the sin that takes place in this verse!). We are not told very much regarding Leah’s day-to-day life in her father’s home, but it does become clear through the reading of Genesis 29 that she was provided for by her father both prior to her marriage and at the time of her union with Jacob (verse 24; please note, however, that I am by no means advocating Laban’s sin of fooling Jacob and allowing polygamy! While he is to be commended for providing for and caring for the needs of his unmarried daughters, he was definitely not perfect!). While the passage of Genesis 29 leaves a lot to be desired in the areas of purity and honesty, it does represent to us the fact that, Biblically, daughters were expected to remain at home until marriage, and fathers were to lead, protect, and provide for them until they married.

Zipporah and her Sisters

To complete today’s study of Biblical stay-at-home daughters, we will turn to Exodus and learn from Reuel’s (also known as Jethro) daughter and Moses’ future wife, Zipporah, and her sisters.

Exodus 2:16,18 reveal that Reuel, the priest of Midian, had seven daughters, all of whom were living under his roof and caring for his flock. Not one of these daughters was pining away in an ivory tower in her father’s home, wasting her time, just waiting for Prince Charming to come. Neither were they feeling sorry for themselves, that they were living at home with Reuel rather than “out in the world”. Likewise, not one daughter complained of drudgery. Rather, each one was actively serving her father and furthering the welfare of his household. Again, they were living examples of faithful, dutiful, polished cornerstones! In verse 21, Reuel gives (there’s that word give again!) his daughter Zipporah to Moses, and so the transition from a submissive and industrious daughter-at-home to the status of wife and homemaker, is a smooth one.

As an additional note, I want to mention the fact that Reuel’s protection and care for his daughter Zipporah did not completely end when he gave her to Moses. Yes, Zipporah now had a new head and a new provider, but when the time came for Moses to leave to fight against Amalek (Exodus 17), Moses sent his wife to her father’s home (Ex. 18:2) to be cared for there during his absence. Here is another example of Leviticus 22:13 in action-when a woman’s husband leaves for one reason or another, she is not left alone, but is rather cared for again by her family at home, just as she was prior to marriage. Another beautiful example of this is that of Thomas “Stonewall” Jackson and his wife Anna. Prior to marriage, Anna dwelt with her family in their homestead, Cottage Home.1 After they were married and the time came for Jackson to leave in order to fight in the War Between the States, Anna went to live with Mr. and Mrs. Page. Mr. Bill Potter, in his excellent work Beloved Bride, recounts what happened next, “In May [of 1861], pursuant to his [Thomas’] wishes, she closed up their Lexington home, sent the family servants to ‘good homes among the permanent residents,’ and moved back to Cottage Home in North Carolina.”2 While some might call this being treated like a doormat and child, I believe that Stonewall held in his heart such a tender, caring, protective love for his beloved wife, that he desired for her to be cared for and protected well while he was away. What a blessing this must have been, ladies! Just like Moses, Jackson did not want his wife to be alone worrying while he was away in the War. Rather, he wanted her to be surrounded with family and friends, and cared for lovingly during this difficult time while he was absent.

In Conclusion

And so concludes our study of stay-at-home daughters in the Bible! As you can see, not only was stay-at-home daughterhood commanded (Num. 30) and referred to (Ps. 45:10,13; 144:12, 1 Cor. 7:36-38), but the Lord also provided us with examples of women living at home until marriage.



As was evident through this study, great blessings are to be had when family dynamics are conducted in such a way as to have adult daughters remain at home until marriage. Just as the glories and blessings of this practice are both numerous and evident, however, so are the dire consequences which often follow an unmarried daughter’s departure from home. We will be addressing this next Friday, when we study the tragic account of Dinah.



*Please note that I am not saying above that a divorced or widowed woman is necessarily living in sin if she lives alone. More on that later, in an upcoming article!



Footnotes




1. Bill Potter, Beloved Bride: The Letters of Stonewall Jackson to His Wife, (The Vision Forum, Inc.) pg. 14



2. Ibid. pg. 41

The Biblical Case for Stay-at-home Daughterhood Part 5

Before we go on to learn from the life of Rebekah in Genesis 24, there is one last passage I want us to quickly study.

Leviticus 22:13

This passage proclaims the following: "But if the priest's daughter be a widow, or divorced, and have no child, and is returned unto her father's house, as in her youth, she shall eat of her father's meat: but there shall no stranger eat thereof." I find this passage to be important, for at least two reasons, when it comes to defending the Biblical doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood.

First, notice the phrase as in her youth. As we discovered in part 2 of this article, the phrase "in her youth" refers to the average marital age, a time, in this case in a woman's life, when she is likely to get married. This phrase does not refer to a little girl; it clearly pertains solely to adult women. In this verse from Leviticus, we see that up until the time of this woman's marriage, she was in her father's home. She was not, as I have reiterated numerous times in previous articles, out on her own providing for and protecting herself and serving as her own independent authority. She was clearly, according to this verse, living in her father's home under his care until her marriage. Being widowed or divorced, she does not return to a life of independence (for she had had no such life to return to!), but rather to her former life under her father's roof.

Second, notice where the widowed or divorced woman resides. This grown woman lives in her father's house! Today, many would see this as weird and needless. However, this practice of a woman who no longer had a husband returning to her father's home as in her youth was common for centuries in our own country! If a woman who was left alone without a husband no longer had a father who was living, she would go to live with an aunt and uncle, brother, or some other relative. The principle was that she was not to be left alone to care for herself. She was to be protected and provided for, so that she would not be under the Double Curse! This is precisely what we see in Leviticus 22:13. Genesis 38:11 reveals that this was a common occurrence in the lives of abandoned women. They went to live with their fathers, just as they had before their wedding day. This is illustrative of the fact that God, in His perfect wisdom and loving design, has so ordained matters as to keep women, whatever their age, under protection, provision, and care. What a loving God we serve!

Lest we think that this was solely an Old Testament practice, let us turn to John 19:26-27 and see how Jesus felt about this issue. This passage proclaims, "When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved [meaning John], he saith unto his mother, 'Woman, behold thy son!' Then saith He to the disciple, 'Behold thy mother!' And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home." When He made this proclamation, Jesus was hanging on the cross, knowing that His death was imminent and He would no longer be there to provide for and protect his mother (for, even after He arose from the dead, He would soon be ascending back into Heaven, thus leaving her alone). Understanding this and desiring to keep Mary provided for and protected, he ordered John to take care of her. From then on, not only did he provide for her needs, but she lived in his home. Again, the principle of women not being off on their own, but rather being provided for and protected is seen, this time through the example of Jesus Christ in the New Testament. Evidently, this practice is by no means one that was abolished with the coming of the New Testament, nor is it to be done away with or disregarded today. The protection of women is still high on God Almighty's list of important doctrines, and the practice of women being protected and never being out on their own is one which He desires for us to continue today.

For the last few weeks, we have had the privilege of studying quite a few wonderful verses pertaining to the glories of stay-at-home daughterhood. Now it is time to see stay-at-home daughterhood in action!

The Life of Rebekah, Stay-at-home Daughter

Not only are the Scriptures replete with passages proclaiming and commanding stay-at-home daughterhood, God has also graciously given us examples of stay-at-home daughters in His Holy Word. Through studying these women of God, we are able to acquire a glimpse into the dynamics of stay-at-home daughterhood and are provided with valuable lessons as to how a daughter at home is to conduct herself and spend her time.

We are first introduced to Rebekah in Genesis 24, where we read that Isaac is ready to be married and his father Abraham sends out a servant to find a godly woman for him to marry. The servant meets Rebekah at a well and is blessed by her servant's heart. Verses 23 and following make it clear that this young woman is still living in her father's house. For example, when asked by the servant about the home, she knows the condition thereof (she is not living off on her own and in need of asking her father about the current condition of the household before she can answer!). She speaks of them (including herself in the family residing in that home) being happy to lodge the servant there, and in verse 55 we see that her family wanted her to remain at home a couple more days before travelling to her future husband's home. It is made evident throughout the chapter of Genesis 24 that this unmarried woman was at home with her family, in her father's household. Again, she was not off on her own, independent, and doing her own thing, as so many unmarried daughters are today!

We will touch on this in a future article, but I want to quickly address Rebekah's daily life in her father's household. She clearly did not consider it a life of drudgery or slavery to be at home with her father, despite the fact that she was a grown woman. Rather, she was joyfully dedicated to serving her family and those around her and intent upon making her household a fruitful, productive place. I truly believe Rebekah could be referred to as a true polished cornerstone, don't you?

In Conclusion

Today we have been able to study both a wonderful verse making clear the Biblical practice of stay-at-home daughterhood, as well as an account of a Biblical stay-at-home daughter. I hope you have been blessed through today's studies and that the Lord continues to reveal to you the joys and blessings of the Scriptural doctrine known as stay-at-home daughterhood!

*Please return next Friday for the continuation of our study of stay-at-home daughters in the Bible!