Rebekah: I love this question, because one of my very favorite things to do is read; I’m always on the lookout for more great books. It is through reading a fantastic book for daughters that the Lord showed me His will for my life as a Christian girl. I received So Much More by Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin for Christmas in 2006, and it forever changed my life. Through reading it, I first became introduced to the concept of stay-at-home daughterhood and came to realize the calling on my life from the Lord. I had never realized how feministic I was in some of my thinking until I read that book. It is an absolute must read for every Christian woman. I cannot recommend it enough! Other outstanding books that have been a blessing to me include Raising Maidens of Virtue by Stacy MacDonald, The Basket of Flowers by Cristoph Von Scmhid (this is a delightful treasure from Lamplighter Publishing), and In My Father’s House: A Vision for Daughters, selected and edited by Tamara and Naomi Joy Valine. In My Father’s House is a must-read collection of essays from the 1800s on topics such as what daughters should spend their time on following graduation, what sort of things they should learn, how they can be a blessing to their families, how to prepare to be a godly wife, how to be fruitful while single, and more. It truly is a treasure! I also just received Miss Jasmine Baucham’s new book, Joyfully at Home. It, too, is proving to be a delightful encouragement.
Showing posts with label Biblical Daughterhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Biblical Daughterhood. Show all posts
Friday, March 11, 2011
Biblical Daughterhood Interview Part 2
Hello, ladies! A couple months or so ago, I posted part 1 of an interview a dear friend, Miss Elizabeth over at Joyful Jewels 4 Jesus conducted with me. I hope you enjoyed that! Here, today, is part 2. Praying that it will be a blessing.
JJ4J: What are some books that have been encouraging to you as a daughter?
Rebekah: I love this question, because one of my very favorite things to do is read; I’m always on the lookout for more great books. It is through reading a fantastic book for daughters that the Lord showed me His will for my life as a Christian girl. I received So Much More by Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin for Christmas in 2006, and it forever changed my life. Through reading it, I first became introduced to the concept of stay-at-home daughterhood and came to realize the calling on my life from the Lord. I had never realized how feministic I was in some of my thinking until I read that book. It is an absolute must read for every Christian woman. I cannot recommend it enough! Other outstanding books that have been a blessing to me include Raising Maidens of Virtue by Stacy MacDonald, The Basket of Flowers by Cristoph Von Scmhid (this is a delightful treasure from Lamplighter Publishing), and In My Father’s House: A Vision for Daughters, selected and edited by Tamara and Naomi Joy Valine. In My Father’s House is a must-read collection of essays from the 1800s on topics such as what daughters should spend their time on following graduation, what sort of things they should learn, how they can be a blessing to their families, how to prepare to be a godly wife, how to be fruitful while single, and more. It truly is a treasure! I also just received Miss Jasmine Baucham’s new book, Joyfully at Home. It, too, is proving to be a delightful encouragement.
Rebekah: I love this question, because one of my very favorite things to do is read; I’m always on the lookout for more great books. It is through reading a fantastic book for daughters that the Lord showed me His will for my life as a Christian girl. I received So Much More by Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin for Christmas in 2006, and it forever changed my life. Through reading it, I first became introduced to the concept of stay-at-home daughterhood and came to realize the calling on my life from the Lord. I had never realized how feministic I was in some of my thinking until I read that book. It is an absolute must read for every Christian woman. I cannot recommend it enough! Other outstanding books that have been a blessing to me include Raising Maidens of Virtue by Stacy MacDonald, The Basket of Flowers by Cristoph Von Scmhid (this is a delightful treasure from Lamplighter Publishing), and In My Father’s House: A Vision for Daughters, selected and edited by Tamara and Naomi Joy Valine. In My Father’s House is a must-read collection of essays from the 1800s on topics such as what daughters should spend their time on following graduation, what sort of things they should learn, how they can be a blessing to their families, how to prepare to be a godly wife, how to be fruitful while single, and more. It truly is a treasure! I also just received Miss Jasmine Baucham’s new book, Joyfully at Home. It, too, is proving to be a delightful encouragement.
To read the rest of the interview, go here!
Friday, January 21, 2011
Biblical Daughterhood Interview Part 1
Hello, readers! I hope y'all had a most blessed Christmas season and are enjoying a delightful new year so far!
How sad it is that my first blog post of the year is all the way on January 21st! My blog has been rather silent as of late, hasn't it? Well, I can assure you there are reasons for that! And it is my prayer that the wait will be well worth it now that the stay-at-home daughterhood article series is back up and running!
Today for the series, we're doing something a little different. About a month ago, a dear sister in Christ, Elizabeth, contacted me about doing an interview with me for her blog. Needless to say, I was delighted and honored that she would want to take the time to interview me. Shortly after that, she sent me a list of excellent questions, and it was a joy to ponder each one and pray about what the Lord would have me to say. Today, I am pleased to present Part 1 of this interview. My heart's prayer is that it would be a blessing and encouragement to you young ladies as you seek to follow Christ with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. God bless you!
JJ4J: Could you please share a little about yourself and your current interests?
Rebekah: First, let me just thank you, Elizabeth, for asking to interview me. I’m honored that you would even take the time to write out these questions. My prayer is that the Lord would use what I say here to be a great blessing and encouragement to the young ladies who read it.
I am an 18 year old homeschool graduate loving life at home with my family in Tennessee. Since graduating high school in May, I have really enjoyed having more time to pursue many different interests including advancing my home business, studying history and God’s Word in a more in-depth manner, serving my friends and family, working on a devotional book project, learning new homemaking skills, taking over meal duties for our family for an entire month (and learning how to stick to our budget for food and household purchases for a month at a time), etc. It’s definitely been an enjoyable learning experience so far!
Rebekah: One of the biggest things the Lord has been teaching me lately is the importance of extending grace to other people. When I first became introduced to the beautiful lifestyle known as stay-at-home daughterhood, I became overly zealous in that I began to look down on other young women who were not stay-at-home daughters or who were not planning to be stay-at-home daughters. In my thinking and in the way I viewed others, I became the “stay-at-home daughterhood police”. I would search the Scriptures and see lovely examples of daughters who lived at home until marriage and would come across passage after passage that revealed the wonderful design the Lord has for unmarried daughters and their lives between graduation and marriage. I would then wonder why so many other Christian girls couldn’t see the clear truths that I could. And instead of extending grace to them like others had done for me before I came to this mindset, I would harbor disdain for them in my heart. So, I would say that one of the biggest things that the Lord has taught me in the past few months is just how much I need to extend grace and love to those Christian daughters who have not yet come to the place where they understand the plan our Lord has for them as unmarried young ladies.
The second main thing that I have been learning is just how deep our Lord’s love for us is. Being loved by the King of Kings and Lord of Lords is far more fulfilling than anything else in the world. Pursuing an ever closer relationship with him is the most worth-while, productive, life-changing mission that anyone could ever go on. It is an absolute delight!
As for what I have been studying, I have been especially honing in on all the passages relating to womanhood and femininity, in the effort to more fully understand how the Lord desires His daughters to act and to see further what pursuits He desires for us to have. This is a very life-changing and eye-opening study that I would highly encourage each and every young lady to conduct. It can be heartbreaking to discover just how far we all are from the Lord’s standard. But in our weakness, He is strong, and through His grace, we can press on towards the goal of Biblical womanhood. As the new year approaches, we have a great opportunity to commit to reading completely through the Scriptures in this next year; may we all be rooted more firmly in God’s Word when the end of 2011 comes!
To read the rest of Part 1, please click here!
Friday, September 24, 2010
What’s the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God Part 3
We have now come to part 3 of this article, the goal of which is to present just why stay-at-home daughterhood is so important to the strength of the church (and family and state, as well!). In the first part we discovered that this doctrine of daughters remaining at home with their families under the protection, input, and provision of their parents until marriage is important because we see it taught and lived out in the Holy Scriptures. In the second part we saw that this doctrine is also important because when women are out from under the protection and oversight of husband or father, danger and disaster can, and oftentimes do, come as a result.
It is now time to study the third reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so important. This third lesson can be stated as follows:
The stay-at-home daughter has the time and opportunity, unlike non stay-at-home daughters, to follow in the footsteps of the Proverbs 31 woman, in that she can more fully study the characteristics thereof and better prepare to be a true Proverbs 31 woman herself. Satan, by luring daughters away from home and family into a more autonomous lifestyle, is slyly and destructively keeping them from striving to be as God’s ideal woman, a woman, in fact, after God’s own heart. A woman who finds her work, mission, and duty primarily within her home.
Following high school graduation, what does the life of most young women today look like? Well, for the vast majority, post-high school life is comprised mostly of attending college for the sake of obtaining a degree in preparation for a future career in the workforce. Part-time or full-time involvement in the workplace is also oftentimes included. What else? Not much. Note what is oftentimes not included in the pursuit of most female high school graduates: homemaking studies, Biblical womanhood studies, preparation for a future life of wifehood, mommyhood, and hospitality from the family home. These subjects are, in essence, ignored and little to no thought whatever is given to them. If any thought is given, it is solely in the arena of preparing for wifehood. However, the preparation that many college age women give to that position is contained in trying to snag a guy or writing out a list of “must have” qualities in a husband. Seldom is any thought given to becoming “Miss Right” or learning how to be an intelligent, capable helpmeet. As one can readily see, the overarching pursuits and priorities of nearly all female high school graduates are attending college in order to obtain the coveted degree, working in the workforce in some career, and striving to go up the corporate ladder. While the world (and sadly, even many professing Christians, as well) view this as normal, good, and the way things ought to be, this condition is tragic from a Biblical viewpoint. From the perspective of God’s Word, everything is upside down in the lives of many college age women today. What they should be pursuing, they are not and what they should not be giving their time to, they are. For the Biblically minded Christian, this should be heartbreaking, for God’s way is so much better and far more fulfilling than rising to the top of any corporate ladder or graduating from a university summa cum laude.
What if I told you that the God of the universe, the Sovereign of heaven and earth not only made Himself known in His Word, but also provided a complete blueprint for how He wants you, as a woman, to live your life? Would that not astound you? To think that the Most High God, the all-wise, all-loving Creator of the world would not only design womanhood in a beautiful way but would also give to you a complete model for how to live your life in a fulfilling, exciting, influential, adventurous, mission-filled way is simply breathtaking! Realizing that we have just such a blessing in the Bible, would we not excitedly run to it and read it in order to discover what the Most High wants us to do with our lives? Well, one should think this would be the case for professing Christians who claim to be sold out to the Lord and love Him above all else and desire to live for Him. Sadly, however, it is oftentimes not. While we may give Christ lip service on Sunday mornings, many of us take His Word for granted, do not treat it as the treasure it is, nor strive to study and live by it. This is tragic, for it is only through following God’s Word and making it the blueprint of our lives that we find the mission and duty we were specially created for as females. The world is all too happy to lend to us its own design for womanhood and is anxiously providing us with what it thinks we ought to spend our time doing. The result is that countless girls and women today are frustrated, exhausted, and burned out. They have been trying to heed to the world’s expectations of college and career while at the same time striving to stay true to what their minds tell them they should do-look after their families, care for the home, and reach out to their neighbors. My heart breaks when I think of the countless young women today who are confused as to what they should be doing with their lives after high school. They keep asking themselves questions- “What should I be doing?”, “Do I have to go to college?”,“What is expected of me?”, “What kind of career should I have?”, and the list goes on. Sadly, the answers they are receiving from both the world as well as many “Christian” churches is that they should go to college in order to get a degree that will pave the way for a successful life-long career. This is not at all what girls should be told, for it is not what God proclaims to them in His Word. As we have seen in a previous article in this series, God decrees that women be homemakers. This is the glorious fulfilling “career” that He designed and prepared specifically for them.
Someone once said, “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail.” By following the lifestyle of most female high school graduates today, young women are planning to fail in that which God the Almighty Himself has called them to do-be homemakers. Contrary to popular belief, Biblical homemaking is about far more than merely baking cookies, cleaning bathtubs, and washing dishes. While each of these things are indeed aspects of good homemaking, they are not the sum total by any means. However, if you heed the world’s teachings on homemaking-that it is mindless drudgery, comprised only of cleaning up messes, looking pretty, vacuuming, and baking cookies, then why not go off to college or begin a career after you graduate high school? After all, how long does it take to learn how to vacuum or clean toilets? However, the world is sorely deceived when it comes to homemaking! Homemaking is not merely some cultural duty of women; rather, it is a command issued by God to women. Furthermore, as the Scriptures beautifully and eloquently present, homemaking is so much more than baking cookies-it is a lifelong mission, duty, and world-changing “career”. Becoming a godly homemaker that lives up to the Bible’s expectations does not happen overnight, nor does it suddenly happen when a wedding ring is placed on your finger. In fact, when one studies the Scriptures, it would be rather easy to despair at the picture of Biblical homemakers-it can seem so daunting and unable to be lived out in daily life. This is precisely why girls are blessed by God with the years in between high school and marriage. This is a time like no other in one’s life when a girl can learn what it truly means to be a Biblical homemaker and can begin putting into practice some of the characteristics of just such a woman, thereby preparing for future life while at the same time greatly blessing and ministering to those around her. Yet this is the precise time when so many girls are instead chasing after college degrees and successful careers in the workforce. Something is wrong here!
Many daughters today, even Christian ones, are unknowingly falling into Satan’s hands. Satan is so crafty that he sets out to seductively lead away girls completing high school into lifestyles of college and career. Why is this? Because, as Proverbs 31 and other passages reveal to us, the secret weapon of the Church is women who understand their roles, delight in and embrace them, and strive to joyfully and diligently live them out with everything they’ve got. As we will see in future articles, the woman who lives according to Proverbs 31 standards is a world changer for God’s glory! She is a powerhouse of Biblical influence. This, of course, is highly dangerous to Satan and his plans, and so he therefore must come up with a way to keep girls from preparing to become like these amazing women. He must do whatever it takes to prevent them from aspiring to God’s standard for homemakers. He must blind their eyes and deafen their ears to God’s Word and instead lead them to focus all their time and attention to becoming independent career women who are intent upon providing for themselves and leading their own lives, with their own missions, plans, and desires in the forefront. Satan, if he hopes to be successful in lessening the influence of God and His Word in the world must keep girls from desiring to be wives, helpmeets, homemakers and mothers. He must not even allow them to know that God expects them to live out the roles and duties of homemaking. Or, if they do know it, Satan must so disfigure the beautiful picture of homemaking and Biblical womanhood into some caricature of worthlessness, being a doormat, being chained to a stove, and accomplishing nothing of importance. In other words, Satan must get daughters to dedicate their unmarried years to pursuing college degrees and working in the workforce alongside men, so that their lives will be more like that designed by God for men, with no time to dedicate to learning homemaking skills. Sadly, he is doing a very good job at his mission isn’t he? Not only does he have the world following in his footsteps, he also has Christian girls falling in lock step, as well. Clever, isn’t it? Indeed it is a rather clever ploy of Satan. By distracting young women in the prime of their youth from using their youth fully to serve the Lord (1 Cor. 7:34), he is able to bar them from following after Proverbs 31 and seeking to live in obedience to God and His expectation and will for women. What folly of highest proportions for us to buy into his ploys, and to dismiss God’s blueprint for womanhood with a dejected belief that to live like the Proverbs 31 woman is either an impossible, unattainable goal or a worthless one!
What comes to mind when you think of the Proverbs 31 woman? If you are like most of today’s Christian women, you get a little squeamish when she is mentioned. In Christendom today, many woman try to simply pass over the chapter of Proverbs 31, specifically verses 10-31, distressed, for they view the Proverbs 31 woman as some “superwoman” whom they could never in reality be like. I even read a book a couple years ago where the author stated that she was now going to turn to Proverbs 31. Instead of praising this passage, she, in essence, apologized to her readers for turning to that chapter that none of them really wanted to deal with or be intimidated by. Dear ones, this is a disgraceful way to treat God’s Word! We should be nothing short of ecstatic that the Lord would take the time to lay out in detail His will for us as females! That is a glorious blessing and yet we so often view it as a hindrance. Why is this? Could it be because we understand that the Lord calls us to be homemakers, and yet we instead want to heed the “wisdom” of the world, with its belief that homemaking is somehow demeaning and archaic?
It breaks my heart when women treat Proverbs 31 as some burden to carry around on their shoulders. The Lord does not desire to burden us or intimidate us. His reason for issuing forth to us the precious passage of Proverbs 31 was so that we as women would be able to grasp just what it is the Lord has for us to do and what He expects of us. He was showing us what our callings are and what our life work is to be. Our God was revealing to us the recipe, if you will, to living a world-changing, fulfilling life as a female.
If this is the case, though, why do so many women view Proverbs 31 with disdain and feel that they could never live up to its expectations? Well, over two years ago I spoke briefly with Anna Sofia Botkin about this very issue and we agreed that these women who feel so intimidated by Proverbs 31 likely would not feel like that today had they, as young ladies, prepared themselves for a life of following in her footsteps. How much closer to the standard found in Proverbs 31:10-31 would many women be today if they had put into practice duties and characteristics of the Proverbs 31 woman while they were yet unmarried young women! I do not write this to belittle Christian women. Rather, I write this with the desire to open the eyes of Christian girls to the importance of living out daily life in such a way that we might bring the most glory to God through living the way He expects us to, and to show why it is so important that we prepare now for our future lives as wives, helpmeets, mothers, and homemakers. We simply cannot go through our unmarried lives focused on the sole priorities of school, college, and work and then expect to become the model housewife when we marry, because that is not going to happen no matter how much we might like it to! In the 1850s, Mr. Harvey Newcomb wrote page after page in his excellent book, How to be a Lady, on the topic that what we are when we are girls, we will be when we become women. How true that is! The pursuits we spend our time on while we are yet little girls and young women and the character we build (or fail to build) at those ages will mold us into the kind of women we will be. While the Lord can certainly change adult women and reform them more into His image, it remains true that the fact is that, largely, the way we are as young women will dictate what kind of adult women we will be. So, dear ones, if, as young girls, we fail to put into practice the virtues and duties of the Proverbs 31 woman by learning and practicing various homemaking skills and the like, we will likely fail to live up to the Proverbs 31 standard as women, and we, too, will despair as many of today’s adult Christian women do when they read this passage of Holy Scripture.
As expressed at the beginning of this article, many female high school graduates are confused as to what they are to spend their time doing. While I will write far more on this topic as we continue this series, suffice it to say now that if the Lord expects us to be Proverbs 31 women, women who love the home and work therein as opposed to being independent career women in the workforce, then what do you think the Lord would desire for us to spend our unmarried years doing? Would it be to go off, live on our own, go to college for a degree in some sort of career, and work in the workplace? This sort of lifestyle seems contradictory to the one God designed for women, does it not? Instead, may we as young women delight in what the Scriptures proclaim to us should be our priorities and pursuits! May we learn to delight in the glories of stay-at-home daughterhood and the advantages such a lifestyle brings to us as we strive to be godly women.
Please return in two weeks on Friday, October 8th for the next article in this series!
It is now time to study the third reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so important. This third lesson can be stated as follows:
The stay-at-home daughter has the time and opportunity, unlike non stay-at-home daughters, to follow in the footsteps of the Proverbs 31 woman, in that she can more fully study the characteristics thereof and better prepare to be a true Proverbs 31 woman herself. Satan, by luring daughters away from home and family into a more autonomous lifestyle, is slyly and destructively keeping them from striving to be as God’s ideal woman, a woman, in fact, after God’s own heart. A woman who finds her work, mission, and duty primarily within her home.
Following high school graduation, what does the life of most young women today look like? Well, for the vast majority, post-high school life is comprised mostly of attending college for the sake of obtaining a degree in preparation for a future career in the workforce. Part-time or full-time involvement in the workplace is also oftentimes included. What else? Not much. Note what is oftentimes not included in the pursuit of most female high school graduates: homemaking studies, Biblical womanhood studies, preparation for a future life of wifehood, mommyhood, and hospitality from the family home. These subjects are, in essence, ignored and little to no thought whatever is given to them. If any thought is given, it is solely in the arena of preparing for wifehood. However, the preparation that many college age women give to that position is contained in trying to snag a guy or writing out a list of “must have” qualities in a husband. Seldom is any thought given to becoming “Miss Right” or learning how to be an intelligent, capable helpmeet. As one can readily see, the overarching pursuits and priorities of nearly all female high school graduates are attending college in order to obtain the coveted degree, working in the workforce in some career, and striving to go up the corporate ladder. While the world (and sadly, even many professing Christians, as well) view this as normal, good, and the way things ought to be, this condition is tragic from a Biblical viewpoint. From the perspective of God’s Word, everything is upside down in the lives of many college age women today. What they should be pursuing, they are not and what they should not be giving their time to, they are. For the Biblically minded Christian, this should be heartbreaking, for God’s way is so much better and far more fulfilling than rising to the top of any corporate ladder or graduating from a university summa cum laude.
What has God Said?
What if I told you that the God of the universe, the Sovereign of heaven and earth not only made Himself known in His Word, but also provided a complete blueprint for how He wants you, as a woman, to live your life? Would that not astound you? To think that the Most High God, the all-wise, all-loving Creator of the world would not only design womanhood in a beautiful way but would also give to you a complete model for how to live your life in a fulfilling, exciting, influential, adventurous, mission-filled way is simply breathtaking! Realizing that we have just such a blessing in the Bible, would we not excitedly run to it and read it in order to discover what the Most High wants us to do with our lives? Well, one should think this would be the case for professing Christians who claim to be sold out to the Lord and love Him above all else and desire to live for Him. Sadly, however, it is oftentimes not. While we may give Christ lip service on Sunday mornings, many of us take His Word for granted, do not treat it as the treasure it is, nor strive to study and live by it. This is tragic, for it is only through following God’s Word and making it the blueprint of our lives that we find the mission and duty we were specially created for as females. The world is all too happy to lend to us its own design for womanhood and is anxiously providing us with what it thinks we ought to spend our time doing. The result is that countless girls and women today are frustrated, exhausted, and burned out. They have been trying to heed to the world’s expectations of college and career while at the same time striving to stay true to what their minds tell them they should do-look after their families, care for the home, and reach out to their neighbors. My heart breaks when I think of the countless young women today who are confused as to what they should be doing with their lives after high school. They keep asking themselves questions- “What should I be doing?”, “Do I have to go to college?”,“What is expected of me?”, “What kind of career should I have?”, and the list goes on. Sadly, the answers they are receiving from both the world as well as many “Christian” churches is that they should go to college in order to get a degree that will pave the way for a successful life-long career. This is not at all what girls should be told, for it is not what God proclaims to them in His Word. As we have seen in a previous article in this series, God decrees that women be homemakers. This is the glorious fulfilling “career” that He designed and prepared specifically for them.
Planning to Fail
Someone once said, “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail.” By following the lifestyle of most female high school graduates today, young women are planning to fail in that which God the Almighty Himself has called them to do-be homemakers. Contrary to popular belief, Biblical homemaking is about far more than merely baking cookies, cleaning bathtubs, and washing dishes. While each of these things are indeed aspects of good homemaking, they are not the sum total by any means. However, if you heed the world’s teachings on homemaking-that it is mindless drudgery, comprised only of cleaning up messes, looking pretty, vacuuming, and baking cookies, then why not go off to college or begin a career after you graduate high school? After all, how long does it take to learn how to vacuum or clean toilets? However, the world is sorely deceived when it comes to homemaking! Homemaking is not merely some cultural duty of women; rather, it is a command issued by God to women. Furthermore, as the Scriptures beautifully and eloquently present, homemaking is so much more than baking cookies-it is a lifelong mission, duty, and world-changing “career”. Becoming a godly homemaker that lives up to the Bible’s expectations does not happen overnight, nor does it suddenly happen when a wedding ring is placed on your finger. In fact, when one studies the Scriptures, it would be rather easy to despair at the picture of Biblical homemakers-it can seem so daunting and unable to be lived out in daily life. This is precisely why girls are blessed by God with the years in between high school and marriage. This is a time like no other in one’s life when a girl can learn what it truly means to be a Biblical homemaker and can begin putting into practice some of the characteristics of just such a woman, thereby preparing for future life while at the same time greatly blessing and ministering to those around her. Yet this is the precise time when so many girls are instead chasing after college degrees and successful careers in the workforce. Something is wrong here!
Giving Satan what he Wants
Many daughters today, even Christian ones, are unknowingly falling into Satan’s hands. Satan is so crafty that he sets out to seductively lead away girls completing high school into lifestyles of college and career. Why is this? Because, as Proverbs 31 and other passages reveal to us, the secret weapon of the Church is women who understand their roles, delight in and embrace them, and strive to joyfully and diligently live them out with everything they’ve got. As we will see in future articles, the woman who lives according to Proverbs 31 standards is a world changer for God’s glory! She is a powerhouse of Biblical influence. This, of course, is highly dangerous to Satan and his plans, and so he therefore must come up with a way to keep girls from preparing to become like these amazing women. He must do whatever it takes to prevent them from aspiring to God’s standard for homemakers. He must blind their eyes and deafen their ears to God’s Word and instead lead them to focus all their time and attention to becoming independent career women who are intent upon providing for themselves and leading their own lives, with their own missions, plans, and desires in the forefront. Satan, if he hopes to be successful in lessening the influence of God and His Word in the world must keep girls from desiring to be wives, helpmeets, homemakers and mothers. He must not even allow them to know that God expects them to live out the roles and duties of homemaking. Or, if they do know it, Satan must so disfigure the beautiful picture of homemaking and Biblical womanhood into some caricature of worthlessness, being a doormat, being chained to a stove, and accomplishing nothing of importance. In other words, Satan must get daughters to dedicate their unmarried years to pursuing college degrees and working in the workforce alongside men, so that their lives will be more like that designed by God for men, with no time to dedicate to learning homemaking skills. Sadly, he is doing a very good job at his mission isn’t he? Not only does he have the world following in his footsteps, he also has Christian girls falling in lock step, as well. Clever, isn’t it? Indeed it is a rather clever ploy of Satan. By distracting young women in the prime of their youth from using their youth fully to serve the Lord (1 Cor. 7:34), he is able to bar them from following after Proverbs 31 and seeking to live in obedience to God and His expectation and will for women. What folly of highest proportions for us to buy into his ploys, and to dismiss God’s blueprint for womanhood with a dejected belief that to live like the Proverbs 31 woman is either an impossible, unattainable goal or a worthless one!
The Proverbs 31 Woman
What comes to mind when you think of the Proverbs 31 woman? If you are like most of today’s Christian women, you get a little squeamish when she is mentioned. In Christendom today, many woman try to simply pass over the chapter of Proverbs 31, specifically verses 10-31, distressed, for they view the Proverbs 31 woman as some “superwoman” whom they could never in reality be like. I even read a book a couple years ago where the author stated that she was now going to turn to Proverbs 31. Instead of praising this passage, she, in essence, apologized to her readers for turning to that chapter that none of them really wanted to deal with or be intimidated by. Dear ones, this is a disgraceful way to treat God’s Word! We should be nothing short of ecstatic that the Lord would take the time to lay out in detail His will for us as females! That is a glorious blessing and yet we so often view it as a hindrance. Why is this? Could it be because we understand that the Lord calls us to be homemakers, and yet we instead want to heed the “wisdom” of the world, with its belief that homemaking is somehow demeaning and archaic?
It breaks my heart when women treat Proverbs 31 as some burden to carry around on their shoulders. The Lord does not desire to burden us or intimidate us. His reason for issuing forth to us the precious passage of Proverbs 31 was so that we as women would be able to grasp just what it is the Lord has for us to do and what He expects of us. He was showing us what our callings are and what our life work is to be. Our God was revealing to us the recipe, if you will, to living a world-changing, fulfilling life as a female.
If this is the case, though, why do so many women view Proverbs 31 with disdain and feel that they could never live up to its expectations? Well, over two years ago I spoke briefly with Anna Sofia Botkin about this very issue and we agreed that these women who feel so intimidated by Proverbs 31 likely would not feel like that today had they, as young ladies, prepared themselves for a life of following in her footsteps. How much closer to the standard found in Proverbs 31:10-31 would many women be today if they had put into practice duties and characteristics of the Proverbs 31 woman while they were yet unmarried young women! I do not write this to belittle Christian women. Rather, I write this with the desire to open the eyes of Christian girls to the importance of living out daily life in such a way that we might bring the most glory to God through living the way He expects us to, and to show why it is so important that we prepare now for our future lives as wives, helpmeets, mothers, and homemakers. We simply cannot go through our unmarried lives focused on the sole priorities of school, college, and work and then expect to become the model housewife when we marry, because that is not going to happen no matter how much we might like it to! In the 1850s, Mr. Harvey Newcomb wrote page after page in his excellent book, How to be a Lady, on the topic that what we are when we are girls, we will be when we become women. How true that is! The pursuits we spend our time on while we are yet little girls and young women and the character we build (or fail to build) at those ages will mold us into the kind of women we will be. While the Lord can certainly change adult women and reform them more into His image, it remains true that the fact is that, largely, the way we are as young women will dictate what kind of adult women we will be. So, dear ones, if, as young girls, we fail to put into practice the virtues and duties of the Proverbs 31 woman by learning and practicing various homemaking skills and the like, we will likely fail to live up to the Proverbs 31 standard as women, and we, too, will despair as many of today’s adult Christian women do when they read this passage of Holy Scripture.
What are we to Do?
As expressed at the beginning of this article, many female high school graduates are confused as to what they are to spend their time doing. While I will write far more on this topic as we continue this series, suffice it to say now that if the Lord expects us to be Proverbs 31 women, women who love the home and work therein as opposed to being independent career women in the workforce, then what do you think the Lord would desire for us to spend our unmarried years doing? Would it be to go off, live on our own, go to college for a degree in some sort of career, and work in the workplace? This sort of lifestyle seems contradictory to the one God designed for women, does it not? Instead, may we as young women delight in what the Scriptures proclaim to us should be our priorities and pursuits! May we learn to delight in the glories of stay-at-home daughterhood and the advantages such a lifestyle brings to us as we strive to be godly women.
Please return in two weeks on Friday, October 8th for the next article in this series!
Saturday, July 24, 2010
What’s the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God Part 2
The mission of this particular article is to help Christendom to come to a fuller understanding of the importance of stay-at-home daughterhood to the Kingdom of God. The magnitude of this importance must not be underestimated, but rather thoroughly pondered, considered, and researched. With this thought in mind, we will proceed with a contemplation of the second truth which girds this doctrine, on the topic of the Biblical family unit, with its importance.
As clearly portrayed in Genesis 3, terrible things can occur when women are on their own, independent of the protection, involvement, and leadership of husband or father.
This is a truth which Satan understands very well. While this is the case, it is also a truth which Christendom has largely forgotten, much to its detriment. Without a sturdy, solid, balanced, and fair understanding of this truth, Christendom begins to be chipped away and attacked by the Adversary, with his minions and ploys.
Now before I continue, I want to make something very clear. The belief presented above is not to say, as the wicked Islamist does, that women have half the brain of man and so therefore must be carefully scrutinized and meticulously controlled, so as to prevent them from making stupid mistakes and blunders which will completely destroy the family. It is likewise not to say that women should be under the domineering, watchful eye of a controlling man every minute of every day. Such is a terribly confused misunderstanding propounded by those, such as the Islamist, who rely upon their own man-made belief systems rather than upon the sure foundation of God’s Word. Now that that has been understood, we can proceed with today’s lesson.
This chapter is perhaps the worst in all of Scripture in terms of the events told of therein. In this passage, man falls from a state of purity and innocence to one of total depravity, rebellion, and wickedness. In this chapter is presented the account of how sin entered into the world and the terrible consequences brought about by it. Verse 1 says, “Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, “Yea, hath God said, ‘Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?’” This verse is noteworthy for several reasons, but for our particular study today, we will only discuss two of these.
Notice first how the serpent, possessed by the Devil himself, is described: he is said to have been more subtil than any other beast. Some translations describe him as being tricky, cunning, deceitful, or crafty. All of these words describe him well, and this subtlety has been what the Adversary has used ever since to slyly deceive and ensnare countless people-even those who claim the name of Christ. Satan is portrayed elsewhere in the Scriptures as parading around as an angel of light (2 Cor. 11:14). This craftiness and worldly wisdom provided him with a method to use in his mission to tempt mankind into committing sin and rebellion against God. What did Satan’s sly, seducing “smarts”, if you will, lead him to do? Go straight to the woman!
This is the second issue to contemplate. Verse 1, after describing the serpent as being subtil goes on to say that he “said unto the woman”. This was by no means a mere coincidence or even a mistake! Satan knew exactly what he was doing when he planned his scheme of deception so as to launch it when he found Eve alone. This is precisely what he wanted, for he knew that he would be far more successful in his mission to deceive mankind and to drive man into rebellion against God if he sought to tempt Eve when he found her alone, at a time when she was without the companionship of her husband, Adam. Speaking on this very issue in a wonderful sermon, Dr. John MacArthur says the following [presented in transcript form from a sermon on the fall of man]:
As we have established previously in this series and as Dr. MacArthur articulated above, God has designed the family in such a way so that women, regardless of age or marital status, will be protected and led by either husband or father. Granted, we live in a fallen world and so having a godly father or husband to lead you may be rare these days (we will discuss that in a future article). However, we cannot take this consequence of sin and use it as an excuse to live however we want to, independently from the family. Two wrongs do not make a right. Interestingly, if we as daughters strive to live independently from our families due to what we see as “less than perfect circumstances” or our own whims, then we are falling into the very trap of Satan with which he ensnared Eve. God desires for daughters to be under the care and authority of their fathers until they are given to their husbands in marriage. As Dr. MacArthur stated above, this is a beautiful and wonderful design! Ladies were created and designed by God to be more emotional that they might be true nurturers, characterized by understanding, sympathy, deep, abiding love, caring spirits, sensitivity, compassion, and tenderness. With this emotional nature, however, also comes vulnerability in some ways. How often have we heard stories of women opening their doors to door-to-door salesmen and, instead of refusing to buy whatever it was due to not having a need for the item or else not having the finances for it, proceeded to buy the worthless item because she “felt sorry for the salesman”? Instances similar to this are very common; they come as a result of our caring nature! However, it can also get us into deep trouble, as well! As Kay Arthur has explained, women are, by nature, more subjective, while men are more objective. Men see the facts that are associated with this choice or that, this event or that, while women are more likely to see another person’s feelings and think of how a certain choice might affect another person’s happiness. This can lead to dangerous situations.The Lord understands this (as did Satan, didn’t he?), and therefore has so ordered matters as to provide the woman with a strong, logical companion to protect her from seducing schemes and dishonest, untrustworthy people. Without this covering, terrible things can occur, and we females can find ourselves in dire circumstances. This is precisely the reason why the laws outlined in Numbers 30 were issued to us by our all-wise God! This is also the reason why we must take seriously the fact that when women are left alone (or go off alone), unwanted events can occur, much as they did in the Garden of Eden.
Some would deny that Eve was alone in the Garden when she was tempted by the Devil, appealing to Genesis 3:6 for support. This verse reads, “And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.“ At first glance, this passage could be made to suggest that Eve was not in fact alone, for Adam was right there beside her in the Garden when the serpent came. However, there are a few issues with this interpretation, which can be outlined as follows.
As noted above, Genesis 3:1 says, “Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, ‘Yeah, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?’” The serpent spoke to the woman, implying that she was alone. Furthermore, we never see the Lord telling Eve not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Rather, in Genesis 2:15-17 (prior to the creation of Eve in verse 22), God proclaims to Adam that he must not eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and that if he were to disobey this order, he would suffer death. Never does the Lord go to Eve and say the same thing. From this, we can deduce that from day one, man was ordained by God to be the spiritual leader. Adam had the responsibility of teaching Eve what God had said and warning her to not sin against Him. Therefore, in all likelihood, had Adam been there standing beside Eve in the Garden when the serpent came to her, he would have strongly protested the devil’s scheme and striven to protect Eve against his wiles. Therefore, from verse 1 of chapter 3, we are introduced to the fact that Eve was alone when the serpent came to her. Yet again, here is proof that Satan found Eve in the precise condition he wanted her-alone, without the protection and oversight of her husband.
Following Eve’s sin and her subsequent enticement of Adam, which led to his own disobedience, Adam gives an account to God of what took place and why he committed his act of sin. Genesis 3:11b-13 says, “’Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?’ And the man said, ‘The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree and I did eat.’ And the Lord God said unto the woman, ‘What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, ‘The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.’” Nowhere does Adam speak of being with Eve when the serpent suddenly appeared and deceived them. Adam was not somehow standing close to Eve when she was being deceived by the Devil, simply whistling and minding his own business (thereby somehow not being deceived) while he watched the deception taking place. He simply was not there with her when the deception occurred! Eve was deceived, but Adam was not. After being deceived, Eve gave the fruit to Adam and he ate. Obviously, shortly after the deception, Eve either went to find Adam to give him the fruit, or perhaps he appeared not long after. Either way, Eve was alone when the deception took place, for Adam testifies plainly that he was not deceived by the serpent-he simply took the fruit that Eve offered him. The way the verses read, it even appears that perhaps Adam did not yet know about the serpent’s appearance, for he speaks solely of Eve giving him the fruit-he does not mention a serpent deceiving Eve. Eve is the one who places the blame on the serpent; therefore, it is perfectly valid to state that perhaps Adam had not yet been notified of the serpent’s deception. Another proof of the fact that Eve was alone when she was deceived!
The verse speaks for itself-Adam simply was not deceived. Had he been present with Eve when the deception took place, the entire account would have likely been different-he may have been deceived, as well. But he was not. This is not to say that man is infinitely stronger than woman when it comes to dealing with temptation and that Adam would have definitely resisted the deception had he been with Eve when it occurred. However, based on this verse, we can know without a shadow of doubt that Eve was in fact alone when the serpent seduced her.
The phrase “with her” does not have to (and Biblically speaking, cannot) be taken to mean that Adam was right by her side in the garden when Eve was deceived by the serpent. Furthermore, it is perfectly understandable for verse 6 of Genesis chapter 3 to say “with her” when we understand that Adam was in the same garden as Eve, the Garden of Eden. Therefore, for the verse to say “with her” is not deceptive in any way. Adam was certainly “with her” in the garden. He simply was not in her presence at the time of the deception.
What do we always hear from feminist circles? What is a notion that is always taught in each and every feminist circle, regardless of how liberal or conservative they may be, their race, religious worldview, etc.? That women should be free to be on their own, living independently from any father or husband, that they should freely make all their own decisions without seeking the advice, wisdom, or input of husband or father, etc. As we will study further in a future article in this series, our modern day feminism has its roots in the pagan Gnostic religion of the late 2nd and 3rd centuries, a pagan witchcraft religion which Satan used (and is still using to this day) to attempt to weaken the Church. Clearly, Satan is using the same ploy as he did in time past-lure the women away from the home and family and, by so doing, influence them with the lies of Satan. The women, in turn, (as Eve herself did) will heavily influence their families with the lies of the Devil. This is the second reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so very crucial to the kingdom of God. Not only is this doctrine presented throughout the Scriptures as we outlined in the first part of this article, but stay-at-home daughterhood also protects daughters from the vile, seducing wiles of Satan. Undoubtedly, between the time of the fall of Satan and the fall of man, the Devil had been eagerly waiting for the perfect time to tempt mankind to rebel against God. Evidently, he had been waiting for the perfect time to pounce, so as to assure victory. What was that perfect scenario? The time when Eve was separated from Adam and alone, without his leadership, covering, and protection. All of this is not to say that women are weak-minded and weak willed and are nothing more than little children when it comes to standing up against temptation. Throughout the Scriptures, we are given examples of strong, feminine, women who fought bravely against the Devil and his attacks. However, as stated above, women tend to be far more subjective than men, and therefore more readily give in to situations that may not be the wisest, simply because they feel sorry for someone else. For this reason, God has given husbands and fathers to guard, protect, and lead their wives and daughters. Again quoting Dr. MacArthur, “She [Eve] was the object of his attack, being the weaker one [this is perfectly true-1 Pet. 3:7-and does not go against what I just said above!] and needing the protection of her husband. He found her alone and unfortified by Adam’s experience and counsel.”2 He goes on to say, “By leaving Adam’s protection and usurping his headship, she was vulnerable and fell, thus confirming how important it was for her to stay under the protection and leadership of her husband.”3
Sadly, in our day, the Christian church is experiencing a dangerous, very destructive problem. There are, thankfully, people who readily admit, as Dr. MacArthur does above, to the need wives have for their husbands to lead and protect them. However, these very same people, many of whom may be good Complementarians, when it comes to the topic of stay-at-home daughterhood, angrily shake in their boots at the very thought, proclaiming that the doctrine is legalistic and that it deprives daughters of the opportunity to do and be everything they should. I’m sorry to say, there is a major disconnect here. Are we supposed to think that daughters do not need the protective oversight and wise leadership of a father, when we know that a wife needs her husband’s leadership and protection? Are we going to say that somehow wives are in great need of that leadership and protection, but that daughters (who are generally younger and more naïve, I might add!), are not? That it is somehow ok to ship them away from home to do their own thing and take full care of themselves immediately following high school graduation? Excuse me for ranting, but how dare we be so foolish! How can we even begin to think that a husband is sinning if he is not lovingly leading and diligently protecting his wife and yet not think the same of a father who sends his daughter off to live on her own? It is high time that the Christian church be Biblically balanced rather than being contradictory and picking out the Scripture passages that they like and ignoring the ones they do not. It is high time we follow God’s Word rather than the idol of self or the idol of the world and its teachings.
Not only do we see in Genesis 3 the importance of women remaining under the protection and leadership of husband or father, but we also see the crucial importance of husbands and fathers actively leading and protecting. I will not dwell on this for very long, as it is not my jurisdiction to teach men. However, I do want to point out to the daughters, for a minute, the importance of that protection-that it is not something to shirk or disdain or even run away from. Rather, it is something to joyfully, wholeheartedly embrace and something in which to delight. Had Adam been actively fulfilling his duty to lead, protect, and guard Eve, the deception would have been far less likely to have been victorious. However, Adam was being negligent in that duty. He then went so far as to, rather than being a man and bearing his responsibility manfully, blame Eve for his eating of the fruit. “The woman whom Thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat. (Gen. 3:12)” Ever since that day in the Garden, men have struggled with refusing to strongly, yet tenderly, lead their families. Instead, ever since that day, men have largely been either domineering tyrants or else couch potatoes who refuse to actively lead, but instead negligently do their own thing. Likewise, ever since that day, women have largely (either simply inwardly in their hearts, or blatantly like the modern day feminist) disdained the authority, leadership, and oversight of men.
May we, the Church of Jesus Christ, refuse to continue wallowing in the mire of those paths! May we, as young women, instead learn to view male leadership, protection, and active involvement in our lives as a great blessing from our Lord Who desires to protect us from the wiles of Satan to which Eve fell prey!
Footnotes
1. http://www.gty.org/Resources/Sermons/90-238_The-Fall-of-Man-Part-1
2. John MacArthur, The MacArthur Study Bible -NKJV (Word Publishing, a division of Thomas Nelson, Inc., 1997), pg. 19
3. Ibid., pg. 1864
As clearly portrayed in Genesis 3, terrible things can occur when women are on their own, independent of the protection, involvement, and leadership of husband or father.
This is a truth which Satan understands very well. While this is the case, it is also a truth which Christendom has largely forgotten, much to its detriment. Without a sturdy, solid, balanced, and fair understanding of this truth, Christendom begins to be chipped away and attacked by the Adversary, with his minions and ploys.
Now before I continue, I want to make something very clear. The belief presented above is not to say, as the wicked Islamist does, that women have half the brain of man and so therefore must be carefully scrutinized and meticulously controlled, so as to prevent them from making stupid mistakes and blunders which will completely destroy the family. It is likewise not to say that women should be under the domineering, watchful eye of a controlling man every minute of every day. Such is a terribly confused misunderstanding propounded by those, such as the Islamist, who rely upon their own man-made belief systems rather than upon the sure foundation of God’s Word. Now that that has been understood, we can proceed with today’s lesson.
Genesis 3
This chapter is perhaps the worst in all of Scripture in terms of the events told of therein. In this passage, man falls from a state of purity and innocence to one of total depravity, rebellion, and wickedness. In this chapter is presented the account of how sin entered into the world and the terrible consequences brought about by it. Verse 1 says, “Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, “Yea, hath God said, ‘Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?’” This verse is noteworthy for several reasons, but for our particular study today, we will only discuss two of these.
Notice first how the serpent, possessed by the Devil himself, is described: he is said to have been more subtil than any other beast. Some translations describe him as being tricky, cunning, deceitful, or crafty. All of these words describe him well, and this subtlety has been what the Adversary has used ever since to slyly deceive and ensnare countless people-even those who claim the name of Christ. Satan is portrayed elsewhere in the Scriptures as parading around as an angel of light (2 Cor. 11:14). This craftiness and worldly wisdom provided him with a method to use in his mission to tempt mankind into committing sin and rebellion against God. What did Satan’s sly, seducing “smarts”, if you will, lead him to do? Go straight to the woman!
This is the second issue to contemplate. Verse 1, after describing the serpent as being subtil goes on to say that he “said unto the woman”. This was by no means a mere coincidence or even a mistake! Satan knew exactly what he was doing when he planned his scheme of deception so as to launch it when he found Eve alone. This is precisely what he wanted, for he knew that he would be far more successful in his mission to deceive mankind and to drive man into rebellion against God if he sought to tempt Eve when he found her alone, at a time when she was without the companionship of her husband, Adam. Speaking on this very issue in a wonderful sermon, Dr. John MacArthur says the following [presented in transcript form from a sermon on the fall of man]:
“First of all, just to note, I ask questions when I study the Bible, my first question is…why did he [Satan] go to Eve and not Adam? Why did he go to Eve and not Adam? Well I think maybe the best answer is 1 Peter 3:7, that woman by God’s design from the physical standpoint, from the emotional structure standpoint is the weaker vessel. God has poured into the lives of women sensitivities, compassions, a certain level of tenderness. She is not by created design the warrior, the fighter, the defender, the protector, she is the one to be defended, to be protected. She is the one who needs to be covered and cared for. That’s why in Ephesians 5 husbands are to love their wives and they’re to be the guardians of their wives’ purity and the guardians of their wives’ character and they are to nourish them and to cherish them. At the same time they are to be their savior, as Christ is the Savior and provider of His church. And [in] 1 Timothy 2 the Apostle Paul says, ‘I do not permit a woman in the church to take leadership, to teach, but rather she is to learn.’ And the New Testament even says she is to go home if she has questions and ask her husband. The husband is the leader, the husband is the spiritual guardian and the spiritual protector of this woman because she is wired to be tender, she is wired to be compliant, she is wired to be compassionate because that is such a critical matter in the rearing of children and in offsetting the strength of her husband. The balance is wonderful. But when a woman is taken out of that protection, there is a level of vulnerability there. That is why [in] the Bible it is normal, it is the standard approach, there are some exceptions by God’s design, but it is normal for women to have a husband, that is the design of God because a woman was designed by God to be a helper to man, to be covered, protected, sheltered, cared for by a man and to take that tender side and use it in the lives of children as well as in the life of her husband. And where a woman does not have a husband, she is still to be the special care of a father who offers her that oversight and that care that she cannot receive from a husband. And we’re reminded by the Apostle Paul in his letter to Timothy that when a young woman loses her husband and becomes a widow, she should marry because she needs that covering, she needs that protection. And that is also why wherever you have divorce with biblical grounds, you have the allowance for remarriage because God knows that women are designed not to go through the world in an unprotected fashion, particularly those women who need to be married who have been designed by God to be married, they need the covering and protection of a husband. Now this situation is exactly what Satan would have wanted, an uncovered, unprotected, sensitive Eve. This is what the Apostle Paul refers to in 2 Corinthians chapter 11 verse 3, ‘I’m afraid lest as the serpent deceived Eve by his craftiness, your minds should be led astray from the simplicity and purity of devotion to Christ.’ What happened was, Eve was led astray. She wandered off. She was found, I’m sure, by Satan in an unprotected condition and that’s exactly what he wanted. Now he may well have succeeded with Adam, but he believed he had a better opportunity to launch this thing with Eve.”1 (emphasis added)
As we have established previously in this series and as Dr. MacArthur articulated above, God has designed the family in such a way so that women, regardless of age or marital status, will be protected and led by either husband or father. Granted, we live in a fallen world and so having a godly father or husband to lead you may be rare these days (we will discuss that in a future article). However, we cannot take this consequence of sin and use it as an excuse to live however we want to, independently from the family. Two wrongs do not make a right. Interestingly, if we as daughters strive to live independently from our families due to what we see as “less than perfect circumstances” or our own whims, then we are falling into the very trap of Satan with which he ensnared Eve. God desires for daughters to be under the care and authority of their fathers until they are given to their husbands in marriage. As Dr. MacArthur stated above, this is a beautiful and wonderful design! Ladies were created and designed by God to be more emotional that they might be true nurturers, characterized by understanding, sympathy, deep, abiding love, caring spirits, sensitivity, compassion, and tenderness. With this emotional nature, however, also comes vulnerability in some ways. How often have we heard stories of women opening their doors to door-to-door salesmen and, instead of refusing to buy whatever it was due to not having a need for the item or else not having the finances for it, proceeded to buy the worthless item because she “felt sorry for the salesman”? Instances similar to this are very common; they come as a result of our caring nature! However, it can also get us into deep trouble, as well! As Kay Arthur has explained, women are, by nature, more subjective, while men are more objective. Men see the facts that are associated with this choice or that, this event or that, while women are more likely to see another person’s feelings and think of how a certain choice might affect another person’s happiness. This can lead to dangerous situations.The Lord understands this (as did Satan, didn’t he?), and therefore has so ordered matters as to provide the woman with a strong, logical companion to protect her from seducing schemes and dishonest, untrustworthy people. Without this covering, terrible things can occur, and we females can find ourselves in dire circumstances. This is precisely the reason why the laws outlined in Numbers 30 were issued to us by our all-wise God! This is also the reason why we must take seriously the fact that when women are left alone (or go off alone), unwanted events can occur, much as they did in the Garden of Eden.
Correctly Interpreting the Meaning of “With Her”
Some would deny that Eve was alone in the Garden when she was tempted by the Devil, appealing to Genesis 3:6 for support. This verse reads, “And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.“ At first glance, this passage could be made to suggest that Eve was not in fact alone, for Adam was right there beside her in the Garden when the serpent came. However, there are a few issues with this interpretation, which can be outlined as follows.
The wording of verse 1 makes it clear that Adam was not present when Eve was deceived.
Adam’s own testimony makes it clear that the deception took place when Eve was alone.
Following Eve’s sin and her subsequent enticement of Adam, which led to his own disobedience, Adam gives an account to God of what took place and why he committed his act of sin. Genesis 3:11b-13 says, “’Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?’ And the man said, ‘The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree and I did eat.’ And the Lord God said unto the woman, ‘What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, ‘The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.’” Nowhere does Adam speak of being with Eve when the serpent suddenly appeared and deceived them. Adam was not somehow standing close to Eve when she was being deceived by the Devil, simply whistling and minding his own business (thereby somehow not being deceived) while he watched the deception taking place. He simply was not there with her when the deception occurred! Eve was deceived, but Adam was not. After being deceived, Eve gave the fruit to Adam and he ate. Obviously, shortly after the deception, Eve either went to find Adam to give him the fruit, or perhaps he appeared not long after. Either way, Eve was alone when the deception took place, for Adam testifies plainly that he was not deceived by the serpent-he simply took the fruit that Eve offered him. The way the verses read, it even appears that perhaps Adam did not yet know about the serpent’s appearance, for he speaks solely of Eve giving him the fruit-he does not mention a serpent deceiving Eve. Eve is the one who places the blame on the serpent; therefore, it is perfectly valid to state that perhaps Adam had not yet been notified of the serpent’s deception. Another proof of the fact that Eve was alone when she was deceived!
The testimony of the Scriptures present the fact that Eve was deceived; Adam was not.
“For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression.”
~1 Timothy 2:13-14
The verse speaks for itself-Adam simply was not deceived. Had he been present with Eve when the deception took place, the entire account would have likely been different-he may have been deceived, as well. But he was not. This is not to say that man is infinitely stronger than woman when it comes to dealing with temptation and that Adam would have definitely resisted the deception had he been with Eve when it occurred. However, based on this verse, we can know without a shadow of doubt that Eve was in fact alone when the serpent seduced her.
The wording “with her” makes perfect sense when it is understood that Adam would have, of course, been in the same garden as Eve.
The phrase “with her” does not have to (and Biblically speaking, cannot) be taken to mean that Adam was right by her side in the garden when Eve was deceived by the serpent. Furthermore, it is perfectly understandable for verse 6 of Genesis chapter 3 to say “with her” when we understand that Adam was in the same garden as Eve, the Garden of Eden. Therefore, for the verse to say “with her” is not deceptive in any way. Adam was certainly “with her” in the garden. He simply was not in her presence at the time of the deception.
In Conclusion:
Applying Lessons from Genesis 3 to Our Day
What do we always hear from feminist circles? What is a notion that is always taught in each and every feminist circle, regardless of how liberal or conservative they may be, their race, religious worldview, etc.? That women should be free to be on their own, living independently from any father or husband, that they should freely make all their own decisions without seeking the advice, wisdom, or input of husband or father, etc. As we will study further in a future article in this series, our modern day feminism has its roots in the pagan Gnostic religion of the late 2nd and 3rd centuries, a pagan witchcraft religion which Satan used (and is still using to this day) to attempt to weaken the Church. Clearly, Satan is using the same ploy as he did in time past-lure the women away from the home and family and, by so doing, influence them with the lies of Satan. The women, in turn, (as Eve herself did) will heavily influence their families with the lies of the Devil. This is the second reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so very crucial to the kingdom of God. Not only is this doctrine presented throughout the Scriptures as we outlined in the first part of this article, but stay-at-home daughterhood also protects daughters from the vile, seducing wiles of Satan. Undoubtedly, between the time of the fall of Satan and the fall of man, the Devil had been eagerly waiting for the perfect time to tempt mankind to rebel against God. Evidently, he had been waiting for the perfect time to pounce, so as to assure victory. What was that perfect scenario? The time when Eve was separated from Adam and alone, without his leadership, covering, and protection. All of this is not to say that women are weak-minded and weak willed and are nothing more than little children when it comes to standing up against temptation. Throughout the Scriptures, we are given examples of strong, feminine, women who fought bravely against the Devil and his attacks. However, as stated above, women tend to be far more subjective than men, and therefore more readily give in to situations that may not be the wisest, simply because they feel sorry for someone else. For this reason, God has given husbands and fathers to guard, protect, and lead their wives and daughters. Again quoting Dr. MacArthur, “She [Eve] was the object of his attack, being the weaker one [this is perfectly true-1 Pet. 3:7-and does not go against what I just said above!] and needing the protection of her husband. He found her alone and unfortified by Adam’s experience and counsel.”2 He goes on to say, “By leaving Adam’s protection and usurping his headship, she was vulnerable and fell, thus confirming how important it was for her to stay under the protection and leadership of her husband.”3
Sadly, in our day, the Christian church is experiencing a dangerous, very destructive problem. There are, thankfully, people who readily admit, as Dr. MacArthur does above, to the need wives have for their husbands to lead and protect them. However, these very same people, many of whom may be good Complementarians, when it comes to the topic of stay-at-home daughterhood, angrily shake in their boots at the very thought, proclaiming that the doctrine is legalistic and that it deprives daughters of the opportunity to do and be everything they should. I’m sorry to say, there is a major disconnect here. Are we supposed to think that daughters do not need the protective oversight and wise leadership of a father, when we know that a wife needs her husband’s leadership and protection? Are we going to say that somehow wives are in great need of that leadership and protection, but that daughters (who are generally younger and more naïve, I might add!), are not? That it is somehow ok to ship them away from home to do their own thing and take full care of themselves immediately following high school graduation? Excuse me for ranting, but how dare we be so foolish! How can we even begin to think that a husband is sinning if he is not lovingly leading and diligently protecting his wife and yet not think the same of a father who sends his daughter off to live on her own? It is high time that the Christian church be Biblically balanced rather than being contradictory and picking out the Scripture passages that they like and ignoring the ones they do not. It is high time we follow God’s Word rather than the idol of self or the idol of the world and its teachings.
Not only do we see in Genesis 3 the importance of women remaining under the protection and leadership of husband or father, but we also see the crucial importance of husbands and fathers actively leading and protecting. I will not dwell on this for very long, as it is not my jurisdiction to teach men. However, I do want to point out to the daughters, for a minute, the importance of that protection-that it is not something to shirk or disdain or even run away from. Rather, it is something to joyfully, wholeheartedly embrace and something in which to delight. Had Adam been actively fulfilling his duty to lead, protect, and guard Eve, the deception would have been far less likely to have been victorious. However, Adam was being negligent in that duty. He then went so far as to, rather than being a man and bearing his responsibility manfully, blame Eve for his eating of the fruit. “The woman whom Thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat. (Gen. 3:12)” Ever since that day in the Garden, men have struggled with refusing to strongly, yet tenderly, lead their families. Instead, ever since that day, men have largely been either domineering tyrants or else couch potatoes who refuse to actively lead, but instead negligently do their own thing. Likewise, ever since that day, women have largely (either simply inwardly in their hearts, or blatantly like the modern day feminist) disdained the authority, leadership, and oversight of men.
May we, the Church of Jesus Christ, refuse to continue wallowing in the mire of those paths! May we, as young women, instead learn to view male leadership, protection, and active involvement in our lives as a great blessing from our Lord Who desires to protect us from the wiles of Satan to which Eve fell prey!
Footnotes
1. http://www.gty.org/Resources/Sermons/90-238_The-Fall-of-Man-Part-1
2. John MacArthur, The MacArthur Study Bible -NKJV (Word Publishing, a division of Thomas Nelson, Inc., 1997), pg. 19
3. Ibid., pg. 1864
Friday, April 23, 2010
What's the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God Part 1
If you have not yet had the opportunity to read the previous articles released in this series, please click here and do so now, before continuing on with this one!
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You have just begun to read the 15th article in the stay-at-home daughterhood article series. Much time, study, prayer, research, writing, re-writing, editing, and replying to comments from readers have gone into this project. Why would I dedicate such time and effort to such a work as this? The answer lies in the importance which the Word of God places upon Biblical womanhood and its correlation with the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood. The practice of unmarried daughters remaining at home until marriage is so viciously hated in our culture today (the reason behind feminism’s hatred of stay-at-home daughterhood will be discussed in an upcoming article). As we know, the Adversary works tirelessly to alter the truths of God’s Word, to slyly deceive and cleverly trick us into following lies, and to keep us from living out the all-wise plan and design of the Creator God. This is why it is so crucial for us to grasp the depth of the importance of the Bible’s teaching on the roles of unmarried daughters, so that we might return to “the old paths, where is the good way” (Jer. 6:16).
There are many in our day who view this doctrine as archaic, with no relevance to today’s more “enlightened” and “progressive” times. However, nothing could be further from the truth. This stance arises from the belief that stay-at-home daughterhood is mere tradition from the ancient days of Judaism and that it therefore holds no bearing upon the Church. If this were the case, I would not take the time to write such a lengthy defense of stay-at-home daughterhood as I have in this article series. For, following mere human tradition has been what has caused such heresy and seeds of discord and trouble to arise in the Church through the past two millennia. For example, in Jesus’ day, the Pharisees (the Jewish leaders) were notorious for creating their own traditions, elevating them to the level of Old Testament law, and striving to enforce the people around them into following these human practices. By doing so, they were guilty of wicked legalism and of forcing the poor people around them into terrible bondage. Jesus was furious with the actions and teachings of the Pharisees. Time and again, He confronted them with rebukes against their legalistic teachings and man-made laws. In one such encounter, as recorded in Mark 7, Jesus chastised them with the following words, quoting the book of Isaiah, “Howbeit in vain do they worship Me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men” (Mk. 7:7). He went on to say, “Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition” (vs. 9). What a disgrace it would be for Christians to be guilty of living and acting in such a manner as this! In like words, the Lord, in Deuteronomy 4:2 says, “Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the Lord your God which I command you.” Clearly, being guilty of adding to God’s Word through the following of mere man-made tradition and practice is a dire sin indeed! One who obeys, and likewise teaches, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, however, is far from guilty of this charge! Grasping this fact was one of the reasons why I felt compelled to begin this series. Observing how many in Christendom either ignore the Bible’s teachings on this subject or else describe it as archaic and the practice as legalistic and based on mere tradition, was alarming. As I began to study this subject and discover the teachings of God, as well as the teachings and plans of those who hate this beloved doctrine, I began to discover just how far Christendom has wandered from the design of God, that it might follow after the deceptive ways of the enemies of God. It was then, as I began to see the crucial importance of this doctrine to the health and productivity of Christendom, that I set out to formulate this series. From the very beginning, it has been my heart-felt desire to show you not only God’s will and teachings on this topic, but furthermore to express to you just why it is that Christians of the 21st century ought to obey them just as those Christians did in the 1st century or as those Israelites did at the time of Moses.
As stated above, to follow a method or teaching that is based solely on human tradition or outdated practices and then to furthermore force others into following such a lifestyle is a grave sin which the Lord will not take lightly nor overlook. However, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, though first articulated in Moses’ day, is a never-ending commandment of God which is still to be practiced by Christians in our day. To illustrate this fact, what follows is a review and summary of what we learned in the 7 part article on the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood. The following reveals that stay-at-home daughterhood is not only commanded in the Scriptures, but is also described and illustrated in various portions of the Bible. Not only this, but the Lord has also provided us in His Word examples of stay-at-home daughters.
At the very beginning of this series was a study of why woman was created-what she was created to do, what her purpose is, what the Lord expects of her, and the roles and responsibilities He has wisely and lovingly given solely to her. In that 4 part study, we determined that woman was given four specific roles-she was to be a helpmeet to man, a mother, a homemaker, and under the authority and protection of man, both prior to and during marriage. This revelation shows us that a woman’s life and roles all center around the home and family which, as presented in part 1 of the article on the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood, reveals to us that young women, as well, are to lead lives which are occupied with duties to home and family. We discovered that as a result of woman’s roles, even if there were no passages in the Holy Scriptures dealing specifically with the issue of stay-at-home daughterhood, we could still deduce that an unmarried daughter’s life is to be like that of a woman at any age-it is to be characterized by ministry and work in the home, for the sake of the family and all others who enter that home.
As presented in the article on Numbers 30, while this chapter is indeed Old Testament law, it is nonetheless binding upon New Testament Christians today. There are indeed portions of the Old Testament law which are in no way binding upon today’s Christians, for Christ fulfilled them. An example of these would be the sacrificial law, the ceremonial law, the laws pertaining to feasts, and the various laws pertaining to Sabbaths. Christ was and is the ultimate sacrifice, the forgiver of sins, and the rest for our weary souls. Therefore, these areas of Old Testament law are not binding on New Testament Christians, and those who strive to bind Christians to the following of these laws are being as legalistic as were the Pharisees of Jesus’s time. Numbers 30 and other moral laws, and laws dealing with family dynamics, however, are binding to this very day. And if they are not followed by Christians, those Christians are sadly guilty of disobeying the commands of God.
As stated previously in this series, there are passages throughout Scripture which state that daughters remain at home with their families until the time of their marriages, one of which is Leviticus 22:13. This passage, which states, “But if the priest’s daughter be a widow, or divorced, and have no child, and is returned unto her father’s house, as in her youth, she shall eat of her father’s meat; but there shall no stranger eat thereof,” shows that it was normative for daughters to remain at home until marriage, as opposed to leading autonomous lifestyles up until marriage. Not only this, but protection of women is so important to our Lord, Who desires for women to never be alone, but to rather be lovingly provided for, that widows commonly returned to the homes of their families following the deaths of their husbands. Examples of this are Ruth and Orpah. Furthermore, women are so dear to the heart of the Lord Jesus Christ that, in the book of John, He commissioned John to care for His mother, Mary, after His death. From that moment on, Mary remained in John’s home, being cared for and protected as Jesus had commanded.
~~~~~~~~~~
You have just begun to read the 15th article in the stay-at-home daughterhood article series. Much time, study, prayer, research, writing, re-writing, editing, and replying to comments from readers have gone into this project. Why would I dedicate such time and effort to such a work as this? The answer lies in the importance which the Word of God places upon Biblical womanhood and its correlation with the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood. The practice of unmarried daughters remaining at home until marriage is so viciously hated in our culture today (the reason behind feminism’s hatred of stay-at-home daughterhood will be discussed in an upcoming article). As we know, the Adversary works tirelessly to alter the truths of God’s Word, to slyly deceive and cleverly trick us into following lies, and to keep us from living out the all-wise plan and design of the Creator God. This is why it is so crucial for us to grasp the depth of the importance of the Bible’s teaching on the roles of unmarried daughters, so that we might return to “the old paths, where is the good way” (Jer. 6:16).
The Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God
The doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood and obedience thereto is crucial for a number of reasons, the first and most important of which can be articulated as follows:
Stay-at-home daughterhood is crucial to the Kingdom of God because God Himself commands it.
This fact is the one which makes stay-at-home daughterhood so very important to the health and furtherance of the Kingdom of God. While other facts can (and will) be brought up which lead credence to the belief that stay-at-home daughterhood is important, no other fact is as crucial as the one illustrated above. Nor does any other fact give stay-at-home daughterhood the vast level of importance as this one does. Because God, in His Word, clearly reveals His design for Biblical daughterhood, it is imperative that we follow and obey it faithfully and with great diligence and joy, knowing God’s will to always be best.
There are many in our day who view this doctrine as archaic, with no relevance to today’s more “enlightened” and “progressive” times. However, nothing could be further from the truth. This stance arises from the belief that stay-at-home daughterhood is mere tradition from the ancient days of Judaism and that it therefore holds no bearing upon the Church. If this were the case, I would not take the time to write such a lengthy defense of stay-at-home daughterhood as I have in this article series. For, following mere human tradition has been what has caused such heresy and seeds of discord and trouble to arise in the Church through the past two millennia. For example, in Jesus’ day, the Pharisees (the Jewish leaders) were notorious for creating their own traditions, elevating them to the level of Old Testament law, and striving to enforce the people around them into following these human practices. By doing so, they were guilty of wicked legalism and of forcing the poor people around them into terrible bondage. Jesus was furious with the actions and teachings of the Pharisees. Time and again, He confronted them with rebukes against their legalistic teachings and man-made laws. In one such encounter, as recorded in Mark 7, Jesus chastised them with the following words, quoting the book of Isaiah, “Howbeit in vain do they worship Me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men” (Mk. 7:7). He went on to say, “Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition” (vs. 9). What a disgrace it would be for Christians to be guilty of living and acting in such a manner as this! In like words, the Lord, in Deuteronomy 4:2 says, “Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the Lord your God which I command you.” Clearly, being guilty of adding to God’s Word through the following of mere man-made tradition and practice is a dire sin indeed! One who obeys, and likewise teaches, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, however, is far from guilty of this charge! Grasping this fact was one of the reasons why I felt compelled to begin this series. Observing how many in Christendom either ignore the Bible’s teachings on this subject or else describe it as archaic and the practice as legalistic and based on mere tradition, was alarming. As I began to study this subject and discover the teachings of God, as well as the teachings and plans of those who hate this beloved doctrine, I began to discover just how far Christendom has wandered from the design of God, that it might follow after the deceptive ways of the enemies of God. It was then, as I began to see the crucial importance of this doctrine to the health and productivity of Christendom, that I set out to formulate this series. From the very beginning, it has been my heart-felt desire to show you not only God’s will and teachings on this topic, but furthermore to express to you just why it is that Christians of the 21st century ought to obey them just as those Christians did in the 1st century or as those Israelites did at the time of Moses.
As stated above, to follow a method or teaching that is based solely on human tradition or outdated practices and then to furthermore force others into following such a lifestyle is a grave sin which the Lord will not take lightly nor overlook. However, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, though first articulated in Moses’ day, is a never-ending commandment of God which is still to be practiced by Christians in our day. To illustrate this fact, what follows is a review and summary of what we learned in the 7 part article on the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood. The following reveals that stay-at-home daughterhood is not only commanded in the Scriptures, but is also described and illustrated in various portions of the Bible. Not only this, but the Lord has also provided us in His Word examples of stay-at-home daughters.
The Roles of Women
Numbers 30
Numbers 30 is Old Testament law which deals with the responsibility husbands and fathers have of leading and protecting their wives and daughters. Interestingly, this passage lays forth the responsibility fathers have of diligently protecting and having authority over their daughters until the time those daughters marry. In other words, according to Numbers 30, daughters are to remain at home with their fathers until they marry, at which time they are to be led and protected by their husbands. Crystal clear through the reading of this chapter is that there is no time in a daughter’s life when she is to be off on her own, leading her own life and seeking to protect herself. Daughters are shown to be under the authority and protections of their fathers up until they are transferred to the authority and protection of their husbands. In other words, in Numbers 30, in the very law of God itself, there is no time in which a daughter is to be off on her own. If you would like to study this chapter and the implications thereof, I encourage you to read part 2 of the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood article, which is dedicated solely to the teachings of Numbers 30.
As presented in the article on Numbers 30, while this chapter is indeed Old Testament law, it is nonetheless binding upon New Testament Christians today. There are indeed portions of the Old Testament law which are in no way binding upon today’s Christians, for Christ fulfilled them. An example of these would be the sacrificial law, the ceremonial law, the laws pertaining to feasts, and the various laws pertaining to Sabbaths. Christ was and is the ultimate sacrifice, the forgiver of sins, and the rest for our weary souls. Therefore, these areas of Old Testament law are not binding on New Testament Christians, and those who strive to bind Christians to the following of these laws are being as legalistic as were the Pharisees of Jesus’s time. Numbers 30 and other moral laws, and laws dealing with family dynamics, however, are binding to this very day. And if they are not followed by Christians, those Christians are sadly guilty of disobeying the commands of God.
Sons Leave, Daughters are Given
The Lord also presents stay-at-home daughterhood when, in His Word, sons are described as going out and finding wives of their own, while daughters are said to be given by their fathers in marriage. This is revealed in numerous passages, such as Genesis 28:1, 5-7; 29:1, 19, 24; 34:9. While sons leave the homes of their childhood, that they might search out a wife, daughters are shown to be remaining at home under the protection of their fathers until they give them in marriage. The Bible is replete with examples of this.
Leviticus 22:13 and Other Assorted Passages
As stated previously in this series, there are passages throughout Scripture which state that daughters remain at home with their families until the time of their marriages, one of which is Leviticus 22:13. This passage, which states, “But if the priest’s daughter be a widow, or divorced, and have no child, and is returned unto her father’s house, as in her youth, she shall eat of her father’s meat; but there shall no stranger eat thereof,” shows that it was normative for daughters to remain at home until marriage, as opposed to leading autonomous lifestyles up until marriage. Not only this, but protection of women is so important to our Lord, Who desires for women to never be alone, but to rather be lovingly provided for, that widows commonly returned to the homes of their families following the deaths of their husbands. Examples of this are Ruth and Orpah. Furthermore, women are so dear to the heart of the Lord Jesus Christ that, in the book of John, He commissioned John to care for His mother, Mary, after His death. From that moment on, Mary remained in John’s home, being cared for and protected as Jesus had commanded.
Psalms 45 and 144
In a previous article, these beautiful Psalms were discussed and studied. Psalm 45:10 shows that the royal daughter lived at home with her father until the time of her wedding. Furthermore, verse 13 reveals that in the palace, be that her father’s or her husband’s, she was glorious. She was not some household drudge. No, far from it! She was as the Proverbs 31 woman, who was a glory in her home. Psalm 144:12 presents the role given to each and every unmarried daughter-that of being a polished cornerstone in her father’s home. A daughter is to be preoccupied not with jobs, interests, and duties outside her home; but rather, her main priority is to be her home-she is to work there, minister there, and serve there. That is the glorious sphere which the Lord provided for her, and it is there where she can be glorious. These passages reveal to us the Lord’s will that daughters not only remain at home until marriage, but that they remain fruitful and productive there, ever seeking to strengthen those who enter therein.
1 Corinthians 7:36-38
The idea that stay-at-home daughterhood is taught only in the Old Testament is based upon ignorance and falsehood, for in 1 Corinthians 7:36-38, fathers are given the authority to choose whether they will give their daughters in marriage or keep them (thereby again implying that their daughters are at home with them until marriage). The KJV makes it clear that fathers and daughters are the subjects of these verses, while more modern translations such as the ESV, blur this truth and attempt to present this passage as dealing with people who are betrothed. However, many who staunchly defend the ESV nonetheless admit that the translation and interpretation of verses 36-38 should be understood to be referring to fathers and the authority they have over their daughters.
Examples of Stay-at-home Daughters
Not only does the Lord issue forth commands regarding the lifestyles of unmarried daughters and provide passages illustrating and describing stay-at-home daughterhood, He also places in His Word examples of daughters who remained at home until marriage. Women such as Rebekah, Rachel, and Zipporah, among others, are shown to have been productive, fruitful daughters who worked hard to serve their families and households.
In Conclusion
The purpose of this presentation was to reiterate the fact that stay-at-home daughterhood is presented throughout all of Scripture. Through revealing this to be the case, it should become clear that the main reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so crucially important is because God has commanded and ordained this practice (Num. 30, 1 Cor. 7:36-38, etc.). God alone is all-wise; and therefore, He alone has the wisdom and knowledge to dictate what we are to do in order to flourish and further His Kingdom. We humans often attempt to serve God on our own terms, leading lives not according to God’s laws, but rather according to what we want to do. This, however, cannot accurately be deemed service. If we desire to advance the Kingdom of God and its causes, then we must live and serve on His terms and according to His design. It is therefore crucial that we unearth the long lost practice of stay-at-home daughterhood and once again live according to the dictates of God’s Word alone. When we do so, we may be surprised as to just how fruitfully we are able to serve the Lord and advance His dominion on this earth! We have an exciting opportunity before us-an opportunity to advance Christ’s Kingdom in amazing and exciting ways. To do so, however, we must live not according to what our goals may be or what the world expects of us. We must pattern our lives according to God’s unchanging Word and it alone. The question is-will Christendom be willing to give up the ways of the world, that they might serve and glorify Christ on His terms rather than our own? It is my prayer that this will be the case, both for the sake of the Lord and His Kingdom and for that of the world to which we are called to minister!
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Upcoming Articles in the Stay-at-home Daughterhood Article Series
While the stay-at-home daughterhood article series is already comprised of 14 articles, many more are currently in the works and will be posted in the near future, at the rate of, Lord willing, one per week. It is my desire in this current post to share with you what you can expect to see addressed in this series in the near future. My hope is that you will continue to read and ponder the previous articles, diligently search and study the Holy Scriptures, and pray that the Lord would open your eyes to the glories of His truths. What follows is a tentative listing of the future articles in the stay-at-home daughterhood article series, provided here for you that you might prepare for the reading thereof through Bible study and prayer.
Lord willing, a new article will be posted on each subsequent Friday beginning April 23. The topics that will soon be covered include the following:
“What’s the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God”
This article, which will be posted in 2, perhaps 3, parts, will delve into the issue of why stay-at-home daughterhood should even be pondered so deeply or discussed at such length in our day. For many, stay-at-home daughterhood is viewed as an archaic, out of date concept which is of no importance or relevance to us today. Nothing, however, could be further from the truth. Stay-at-home daughterhood is of just as much importance and relevance now as it was in the days in which it was written of in the Holy Scriptures. In some ways, it is of even more importance today, in an age in which feminism has so thoroughly and pervasively influenced each and every aspect of society, the most evident of which may perhaps be the home and family. In this article, I will work to reveal just why it is so important to ponder the implications of stay-at-home daughterhood and to work to carefully and diligently put its principles into practice. This portion of the article series may be very eye-opening!
“Feminist Fury: Why Feminism Despises Stay-at-home Daughterhood and How it is Attempting to Destroy It"
The concept of stay-at-home daughterhood is not only a sorely misunderstood one today, but is one which is severely hated and disdained. The question is, “Why?” Why is stay-at-home daughterhood so actively and staunchly hated by feminists of all backgrounds and belief systems? Feminists want you to believe that their rejection of stay-at-home daughterhood is due to their being afraid that such a lifestyle would enslave young women, keeping them from realizing and reaching their full potential, barring them from the opportunity to be highly educated, preventing them from having a positive impact on the world, and exposing them to abuse and perpetual childhood. However, when one studies the true history of the feminist movement, what is uncovered is that these are not the actual reasons for the feminist rejection of stay-at-home daughterhood. They are simply the reasons which feminists would have us to believe, so as to prevent us from fully understanding the roots of their disdain for Biblical daughterhood. In this article, which may very well be posted in numerous parts, you will be exposed to the true history and background of feminism and will come to understand just why it is that feminism not only dislikes stay-at-home daughterhood, but thoroughly and ruthlessly hates it. What you learn may surprise you!
“Industry and Commerce: Studying the Issue of Work and Whether or Not a Stay-at-home Daughter Should be Involved in Such Endeavors”
Does this title catch your interest? It should! This article, which, like others, will likely be posted in several installments, will cover such topics as:
• What is work? What is its Biblical definition?
• Is it Biblical for stay-at-home daughters to work? If so, what kind of work should they do?
• Biblically speaking, is it lawful for a stay-at-home daughter to work outside the home?
• Is a father required by God to provide financially for his adult daughters?
• How can a daughter, in a Biblical fashion, contribute to the economy and financial well-being of her family?
• What is a home business? Did women in the Bible own home businesses? How does a daughter go about beginning a home business? What are some practical options for the daughter who desires to begin a home business?
I hope that this will serve as a very helpful and practical article and that it will answer many of today’s common questions regarding the life of the Biblical stay-at-home daughter.
“What About College and Higher Education?”
A common misconception is that stay-at-home daughters, by being dedicated to remaining at home with their parents until marriage, are prevented from acquiring an extensive, in-depth education. Nothing could be further from the truth. In this article, I will seek to expose the lies of our culture which say that in order to be successful and productive, one must go to college. I will also work to reveal the many reasons why it is not only unwise for a young woman to be sent to college, but that in so doing, a daughter is actually hindered from acquiring a truly high education. I will also point out examples from history of women who never set foot on a college campus but are, still to this day, widely known for being erudite and for possessing a lofty intellect and knowledge. We will study the topic of where true knowledge comes from, and will also discover the ways in which colleges and universities-including many leading Christian ones!-are being overrun by humanists (as well as the religion of Islam!) who are diligently seeking to indoctrinate students in the lies of humanism. The topic of why college campuses are so dangerous will also be covered. Do not miss this article, as it is crucially important, for a young woman’s education is crucially important. While Christians commonly fail to understand this, humanists grasp the truth well-our educations will either prepare us to serve others and further Christ’s Kingdom, or else will furnish us for the task of furthering the Adversary’s plans and schemes.
“What About Ministry?”
There are those who hold to the belief that if a daughter remains at home until marriage, she will be unable to further the Kingdom of God through Christian ministry to lost and hurting souls. This is an entirely false idea. This article will cover such issues as the following:
• What about overseas ministry?
• What if an unmarried daughter feels called to leave home in order to minister in a foreign country or different state?
• How do the Scriptures present the topic of ministry? Through what spheres did God ordain ministry to take place?
• Who is called to Christian ministry?
• What ministry options are open to the Biblically-minded stay-at-home daughter?
This will undoubtedly be a rather controversial article, but one must not shrink away from the controversial when God’s Word and the furthering of His Kingdom are what is at stake.
“What is a Stay-at-home Daughter to Do?”
Common is the view that stay-at-home daughters are chained to the home and lead lives of little use or productive importance. The belief is that such daughters are either couch potatoes or that they are having little positive impact on the world through their homemaking, cooking, and sewing. Both notions are false. In this article, which will be comprised of several parts, we will discuss what a Biblical stay-at-home daughter’s life is to look like. Now, the lives of all stay-at-home daughters are not going to look the same, nor should they. Stay-at-home daughterhood is not about faithfully filling some cookie cutter shape. Rather, it is about taking the principles of God’s Word and putting them into practice in one’s day-to-day life. Topics covered will be the importance of developing close relationships with siblings, serving the church, strengthening the household, serving and honoring parents, learning and putting into practice various homemaking skills, reaching out to the community, and more. As you will undoubtedly see, the stay-at-home daughter who lives her life according to the Bible and the priorities it places upon her, will not only live a full, fulfilling life at home, but will also be highly productive and happy. We will be joined in this article study by my dear mother, who will, via interview, speak on what she has learned regarding the importance of learning homemaking skills and preparing for a life of being a wife, mother, and homemaker from an early age. We will also likely be joined by my father, as well, in an interview on the topic of how a daughter can help, encourage, strengthen, and serve her father and his household.
“Stay-at-home Daughterhood Exaggerated”
Perhaps the most common reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so hated in our day, is that there is a popular misconception abounding which says that stay-at-home daughters are retarded in their growth into adulthood by remaining at home. The belief is that they are somehow forced into a life of meaningless, perpetual childhood. While this may be true in some families, it is not the truth for the majority of stay-at-home daughters in the West and is by no means faithful to Biblical family dynamics. In this article, I will address the problem of exaggerating the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood into something it was never meant by God to be. I will also state that we must refrain from basing our beliefs, on the topic of Biblical daughterhood, upon the sinful practices of others.
“Representing Stay-at-home Daughterhood Well”
In our day, a faithful and Biblical stay-at-home daughter is a pioneer in every sense of the word. She is blazing a trail back to the “old paths, where is the good way” (Jere. 6:16). Though we live in an age when many stay-at-home daughters experience disdain and ridicule from family and friends who disagree with their lifestyle, this is not a mere discouraging and frustrating time to live. No, far from it! For the Biblically-minded, visionary stay-at-home daughter, this is a most exciting time to live! We, as 21st century stay-at-home daughters, have the unique opportunity to lead the Church, by example and through faithfulness to God, back to His life-changing Word. The intent of this article is to be an encouragement to stay-at-home daughters and to provide for them a vision of the exciting opportunities open to them to be a dominion-minded, fruitful pioneer. This article will also address ways in which a stay-at-home daughter can Biblically represent the doctrine and practice of stay-at-home daughterhood well. Common failures committed by daughters which cause others to disdain the practice of stay-at-home daughterhood will also be addressed.
“Dealing with Difficulties: Living Biblically in an UnBiblical World”
In some ways, this may prove to be one of the most helpful articles of this entire series. Undoubtedly, there are many daughters out there who come from less than perfect family situations who are frustrated and discouraged because they want to fulfill the stay-at-home daughterhood model found in the Bible but think such to be impossible given the way in which their family currently operates. While I by no means have all the answers, it is my desire to, by God’s grace, be of help to daughters who may find themselves in hard times and discouraging circumstances. Difficulties addressed in this article, which will consist of several parts, include the following:
• “I know that, Biblically speaking, my father has the responsibility to lead, protect, and provide for me until he gives me in marriage. However, my father does not understand this, and desires to release me to be on my own once I turn 18. What hope do I have? What should I do?”
• “As a young woman of God, I know that my calling is to serve my father’s household, to actively work at home, and to be a true polished cornerstone there. My father desires for me to work outside the home, though. What should I do?”
• “My father wants me to have the experience of going to college, but the thought scares me. I prefer to further my education at home. I want to honor my father, but I also want to be faithful to what I believe the Lord wants me to do. What should I do in this situation?”
• “My father wants me to remain at home until marriage, but I don’t want to! What should I do?”
• And much more!
Again, I do not have all the answers, nor do I pretend to. However, I do believe that there are certain Biblical principles by which daughters in difficult situations can, through following them, have joy and, by God’s grace, live in a Biblical manner. I pray that this article will bring much joy, encouragement, and vision to young women, and that through it, they may gain the ability to faithfully persevere.
Interviews
Once the various articles themselves have been posted, an assortment of interviews will follow. I believe that these will be a great blessing to you, and will serve to encourage you to faithfully follow in the ways of God. Interviews will be conducted with various young women such as Miss Jocelyn Dixon from the “A Pondering Heart” blog and Feelin’ Feminine, Miss Jasmine Baucham of “Joyfully at Home”, sisters Breezy and Emily Rose Brookshire, and sisters Claudia and Blair Brown.
Giveaways
The stay-at-home daughterhood article series will culminate in an assortment of giveaways of Biblical books, CDs, and DVDs, all on the topic of Biblical daughterhood. You won’t want to miss these opportunities to acquire various encouraging, edifying resources!
In Conclusion
As you can see, the stay-at-home daughterhood article series is far from complete! Beginning Friday, April 23, a new article in the series will, Lord willing, be posted each Friday. Please spread the word about this series and pray that the Lord would open your eyes to the truths of His Word.
God bless you!
Lord willing, a new article will be posted on each subsequent Friday beginning April 23. The topics that will soon be covered include the following:
“What’s the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God”
This article, which will be posted in 2, perhaps 3, parts, will delve into the issue of why stay-at-home daughterhood should even be pondered so deeply or discussed at such length in our day. For many, stay-at-home daughterhood is viewed as an archaic, out of date concept which is of no importance or relevance to us today. Nothing, however, could be further from the truth. Stay-at-home daughterhood is of just as much importance and relevance now as it was in the days in which it was written of in the Holy Scriptures. In some ways, it is of even more importance today, in an age in which feminism has so thoroughly and pervasively influenced each and every aspect of society, the most evident of which may perhaps be the home and family. In this article, I will work to reveal just why it is so important to ponder the implications of stay-at-home daughterhood and to work to carefully and diligently put its principles into practice. This portion of the article series may be very eye-opening!
“Feminist Fury: Why Feminism Despises Stay-at-home Daughterhood and How it is Attempting to Destroy It"
The concept of stay-at-home daughterhood is not only a sorely misunderstood one today, but is one which is severely hated and disdained. The question is, “Why?” Why is stay-at-home daughterhood so actively and staunchly hated by feminists of all backgrounds and belief systems? Feminists want you to believe that their rejection of stay-at-home daughterhood is due to their being afraid that such a lifestyle would enslave young women, keeping them from realizing and reaching their full potential, barring them from the opportunity to be highly educated, preventing them from having a positive impact on the world, and exposing them to abuse and perpetual childhood. However, when one studies the true history of the feminist movement, what is uncovered is that these are not the actual reasons for the feminist rejection of stay-at-home daughterhood. They are simply the reasons which feminists would have us to believe, so as to prevent us from fully understanding the roots of their disdain for Biblical daughterhood. In this article, which may very well be posted in numerous parts, you will be exposed to the true history and background of feminism and will come to understand just why it is that feminism not only dislikes stay-at-home daughterhood, but thoroughly and ruthlessly hates it. What you learn may surprise you!
“Industry and Commerce: Studying the Issue of Work and Whether or Not a Stay-at-home Daughter Should be Involved in Such Endeavors”
Does this title catch your interest? It should! This article, which, like others, will likely be posted in several installments, will cover such topics as:
• What is work? What is its Biblical definition?
• Is it Biblical for stay-at-home daughters to work? If so, what kind of work should they do?
• Biblically speaking, is it lawful for a stay-at-home daughter to work outside the home?
• Is a father required by God to provide financially for his adult daughters?
• How can a daughter, in a Biblical fashion, contribute to the economy and financial well-being of her family?
• What is a home business? Did women in the Bible own home businesses? How does a daughter go about beginning a home business? What are some practical options for the daughter who desires to begin a home business?
I hope that this will serve as a very helpful and practical article and that it will answer many of today’s common questions regarding the life of the Biblical stay-at-home daughter.
“What About College and Higher Education?”
A common misconception is that stay-at-home daughters, by being dedicated to remaining at home with their parents until marriage, are prevented from acquiring an extensive, in-depth education. Nothing could be further from the truth. In this article, I will seek to expose the lies of our culture which say that in order to be successful and productive, one must go to college. I will also work to reveal the many reasons why it is not only unwise for a young woman to be sent to college, but that in so doing, a daughter is actually hindered from acquiring a truly high education. I will also point out examples from history of women who never set foot on a college campus but are, still to this day, widely known for being erudite and for possessing a lofty intellect and knowledge. We will study the topic of where true knowledge comes from, and will also discover the ways in which colleges and universities-including many leading Christian ones!-are being overrun by humanists (as well as the religion of Islam!) who are diligently seeking to indoctrinate students in the lies of humanism. The topic of why college campuses are so dangerous will also be covered. Do not miss this article, as it is crucially important, for a young woman’s education is crucially important. While Christians commonly fail to understand this, humanists grasp the truth well-our educations will either prepare us to serve others and further Christ’s Kingdom, or else will furnish us for the task of furthering the Adversary’s plans and schemes.
“What About Ministry?”
There are those who hold to the belief that if a daughter remains at home until marriage, she will be unable to further the Kingdom of God through Christian ministry to lost and hurting souls. This is an entirely false idea. This article will cover such issues as the following:
• What about overseas ministry?
• What if an unmarried daughter feels called to leave home in order to minister in a foreign country or different state?
• How do the Scriptures present the topic of ministry? Through what spheres did God ordain ministry to take place?
• Who is called to Christian ministry?
• What ministry options are open to the Biblically-minded stay-at-home daughter?
This will undoubtedly be a rather controversial article, but one must not shrink away from the controversial when God’s Word and the furthering of His Kingdom are what is at stake.
“What is a Stay-at-home Daughter to Do?”
Common is the view that stay-at-home daughters are chained to the home and lead lives of little use or productive importance. The belief is that such daughters are either couch potatoes or that they are having little positive impact on the world through their homemaking, cooking, and sewing. Both notions are false. In this article, which will be comprised of several parts, we will discuss what a Biblical stay-at-home daughter’s life is to look like. Now, the lives of all stay-at-home daughters are not going to look the same, nor should they. Stay-at-home daughterhood is not about faithfully filling some cookie cutter shape. Rather, it is about taking the principles of God’s Word and putting them into practice in one’s day-to-day life. Topics covered will be the importance of developing close relationships with siblings, serving the church, strengthening the household, serving and honoring parents, learning and putting into practice various homemaking skills, reaching out to the community, and more. As you will undoubtedly see, the stay-at-home daughter who lives her life according to the Bible and the priorities it places upon her, will not only live a full, fulfilling life at home, but will also be highly productive and happy. We will be joined in this article study by my dear mother, who will, via interview, speak on what she has learned regarding the importance of learning homemaking skills and preparing for a life of being a wife, mother, and homemaker from an early age. We will also likely be joined by my father, as well, in an interview on the topic of how a daughter can help, encourage, strengthen, and serve her father and his household.
“Stay-at-home Daughterhood Exaggerated”
Perhaps the most common reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so hated in our day, is that there is a popular misconception abounding which says that stay-at-home daughters are retarded in their growth into adulthood by remaining at home. The belief is that they are somehow forced into a life of meaningless, perpetual childhood. While this may be true in some families, it is not the truth for the majority of stay-at-home daughters in the West and is by no means faithful to Biblical family dynamics. In this article, I will address the problem of exaggerating the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood into something it was never meant by God to be. I will also state that we must refrain from basing our beliefs, on the topic of Biblical daughterhood, upon the sinful practices of others.
“Representing Stay-at-home Daughterhood Well”
In our day, a faithful and Biblical stay-at-home daughter is a pioneer in every sense of the word. She is blazing a trail back to the “old paths, where is the good way” (Jere. 6:16). Though we live in an age when many stay-at-home daughters experience disdain and ridicule from family and friends who disagree with their lifestyle, this is not a mere discouraging and frustrating time to live. No, far from it! For the Biblically-minded, visionary stay-at-home daughter, this is a most exciting time to live! We, as 21st century stay-at-home daughters, have the unique opportunity to lead the Church, by example and through faithfulness to God, back to His life-changing Word. The intent of this article is to be an encouragement to stay-at-home daughters and to provide for them a vision of the exciting opportunities open to them to be a dominion-minded, fruitful pioneer. This article will also address ways in which a stay-at-home daughter can Biblically represent the doctrine and practice of stay-at-home daughterhood well. Common failures committed by daughters which cause others to disdain the practice of stay-at-home daughterhood will also be addressed.
“Dealing with Difficulties: Living Biblically in an UnBiblical World”
In some ways, this may prove to be one of the most helpful articles of this entire series. Undoubtedly, there are many daughters out there who come from less than perfect family situations who are frustrated and discouraged because they want to fulfill the stay-at-home daughterhood model found in the Bible but think such to be impossible given the way in which their family currently operates. While I by no means have all the answers, it is my desire to, by God’s grace, be of help to daughters who may find themselves in hard times and discouraging circumstances. Difficulties addressed in this article, which will consist of several parts, include the following:
• “I know that, Biblically speaking, my father has the responsibility to lead, protect, and provide for me until he gives me in marriage. However, my father does not understand this, and desires to release me to be on my own once I turn 18. What hope do I have? What should I do?”
• “As a young woman of God, I know that my calling is to serve my father’s household, to actively work at home, and to be a true polished cornerstone there. My father desires for me to work outside the home, though. What should I do?”
• “My father wants me to have the experience of going to college, but the thought scares me. I prefer to further my education at home. I want to honor my father, but I also want to be faithful to what I believe the Lord wants me to do. What should I do in this situation?”
• “My father wants me to remain at home until marriage, but I don’t want to! What should I do?”
• And much more!
Again, I do not have all the answers, nor do I pretend to. However, I do believe that there are certain Biblical principles by which daughters in difficult situations can, through following them, have joy and, by God’s grace, live in a Biblical manner. I pray that this article will bring much joy, encouragement, and vision to young women, and that through it, they may gain the ability to faithfully persevere.
Interviews
Once the various articles themselves have been posted, an assortment of interviews will follow. I believe that these will be a great blessing to you, and will serve to encourage you to faithfully follow in the ways of God. Interviews will be conducted with various young women such as Miss Jocelyn Dixon from the “A Pondering Heart” blog and Feelin’ Feminine, Miss Jasmine Baucham of “Joyfully at Home”, sisters Breezy and Emily Rose Brookshire, and sisters Claudia and Blair Brown.
Giveaways
The stay-at-home daughterhood article series will culminate in an assortment of giveaways of Biblical books, CDs, and DVDs, all on the topic of Biblical daughterhood. You won’t want to miss these opportunities to acquire various encouraging, edifying resources!
In Conclusion
As you can see, the stay-at-home daughterhood article series is far from complete! Beginning Friday, April 23, a new article in the series will, Lord willing, be posted each Friday. Please spread the word about this series and pray that the Lord would open your eyes to the truths of His Word.
God bless you!
Friday, March 12, 2010
Sheltered? Yes, Please!
Among the most popular objections to stay-at-home daughterhood which abound today, is that daughters who remain at home until marriage are too sheltered. Is this a worthy claim? What is meant by this accusation? What does it truly mean to be sheltered? Should a young woman who is remaining in her father’s home until marriage be sheltered? Answering these questions and more will be the object of this next article in the stay-at-home daughterhood series.
3. He that defends or guards from danger; a protector
4. To cover from violence, injury, annoyance or attack; as a valley sheltered from the north wind by a mountain.
5. To defend; to protect from danger; to secure or render safe; to harbor
6. To betake to cover or a safe place
7. To cover from notice; to disguise for protection
Mr. Webster goes on to describe the word “sheltered” in these words, “Covered from injury or annoyance; defended; protected”. This sounds like a good thing, even a merciful blessing, does it not?
When I think of shelter, what comes to mind is the same scenario as one of those Mr. Webster mentioned. Imagine that you are driving down a strange road, lost in a densely wooded, unfamiliar area, when a thunderstorm suddenly strikes. Torrential downpours, deafening thunder, and scary, electrifying lightening plague you as you strive to continue on your journey. Trying to find a familiar road, you seek ever harder to find your way home. Tired, scared, and terribly hungry, you discover that you will be unable to reach home this night. As fear and uncertainty begin to mount in your heart, a beautiful bed and breakfast suddenly comes into view. You joyfully park your car, and with thanksgiving ringing in the depths of your heart, you bound up the stairs to the inviting front door of the dwelling. Greeted by a warm, cheerful, hospitable face, you are quickly welcomed into the warm abode, ever so comforted by this beautiful shelter. This, dear reader, is the true definition of a shelter. By being sheltered in this home, you are not being blinded to the current events outside the door. You know very well what is taking place outside in the storm-this is the precise reason why you were seeking shelter! You were in a dangerous, destructive world in need of shelter and safety, and when such shelter was offered to you, you eagerly accepted it as a precious gift.
As it pertains to the Biblical practice of stay-at-home daughterhood, being truly sheltered does not mean that you are locked away in your father’s home, uneducated about the ways of the world. Rather, you know all too well the destructive lies and immoral practices of the world, and it is for this reason that you are so thankful for the shelter with which this home affords you. A Biblical stay-at-home daughter is discipled in the ways of Christ by her parents, who strive to teach her the Biblical worldview. Not only this, but they also teach her the lies of the pagan, evil worldviews espoused by many in the world and proceed to equip her with an education which strengthens her with a defense against pervading, unbiblical teachings. Furthermore, she is not “sheltered” in the sense that she is unaware of the vile immorality which takes place in the outside world. Rather, she is protected from those immoral influences and is taught by her parents and by the Holy Spirit, through her reading of the Word, about these various acts of immorality, why they are wrong and dishonoring to the Lord, how they harm those who commit such acts, how to guard against committing them herself, etc. Likewise, a stay-at-home daughter who is operating according to Biblical standards by no means lends a deaf ear and a blind eye to the current events of the day. Far from it! Instead, she understands that as a child of God, it is her duty to be well educated in the events of the day, that she might be able to further the dominion of Christ and fulfill her duty to make disciples. True stay-at-home daughters seek to become highly educated in aspects of history and theology, that they might be able to wage war against the schemes of the Devil, proclaim to others the truth of God and the lies of Satan, sound the alarm of what will happen if the world continues on in its sinfulness and depravity, and much more. In other words, she is nothing like the caricature which those who disdain Biblical daughterhood attempt to paint her as. Instead, she represents her father and his ways well, and joyfully submits to the role God ordained specifically for her, being a truly radiant, intelligent polished corner stone (Ps. 144:112b). When her antagonists attempt to label her as a poor sheltered young woman, she lives out 1 Peter 3:16, which says, “Having a good conscience; that whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.”
The word “sheltered” is today widely misrepresented, completely misunderstood, and terribly misused. Those who disdain stay-at-home daughterhood claim the word in their attempts to paint this doctrine in the most dire of terms. In doing so, however, they unwittingly refute their own arguments. For, while stay-at-home daughters are not sheltered in the way in which many today claim, they are nonetheless blessedly sheltered (in the true sense of the word!), which is one of the very reasons why they are dedicated to remaining at home. As a bed and breakfast shelters a lost and weary soul from the raging thunderstorm outdoors, so does a father’s home shelter unmarried daughters from the rape, abuse, deception, harassment, murder, unbiblical teachings, sly stalkers and much more which abound in the world. That, dear reader, is the true meaning of being sheltered. And praise the Lord for it!
Footnote
1. Noah Webster, American Dictionary of the English Language (reprinted by Foundation for American Christian Education, 1995)
The Accusation
Fathers who are dedicated to leading and protecting their unmarried daughters until the day in which they give them in marriage, are often accused of sheltering their poor daughters. The implication is that they are locking their daughters away at home, preventing them from having the ability to know what goes on in the world about them and disallowing them from impacting that world in any way. The idea is that somehow those daughters are slaves, chained away in the dark recesses of the home, who are unable to step out into the great blue yonder which abounds outside the four walls of their “cage”. The accusers harbor the notion that somehow these daughters are uneducated in current events, unable to socialize with people outside the home, prevented from extending a hand of ministry and help to those outside, and are living a life which is empty, useless, and terribly, terribly sheltered. There are no doubt households which function in this manner under the iron fist of a dictator-father and who mask their family dynamics with the title “stay-at-home daughterhood”. However, this lifestyle, which is indeed completely unbiblical, cannot be accurately termed as a condition of the daughters being “sheltered”. In fact, the accusation stems from an inherent misunderstanding of this basic word.
The Blessing of Shelter
In his 1828 American Dictionary of the English Language, Mr. Noah Webster describes the word shelter with the following meanings (the first three describing the word when used as a noun, the following ones describing the verb usage):
1. That which covers or defends from injury or annoyance. A house is a shelter from rain and other inclemencies of the weather; the foliage of a tree is a shelter from the rays of the sun.
2. The state of being covered and protected; protection; security
3. He that defends or guards from danger; a protector
4. To cover from violence, injury, annoyance or attack; as a valley sheltered from the north wind by a mountain.
5. To defend; to protect from danger; to secure or render safe; to harbor
6. To betake to cover or a safe place
7. To cover from notice; to disguise for protection
Mr. Webster goes on to describe the word “sheltered” in these words, “Covered from injury or annoyance; defended; protected”. This sounds like a good thing, even a merciful blessing, does it not?
When I think of shelter, what comes to mind is the same scenario as one of those Mr. Webster mentioned. Imagine that you are driving down a strange road, lost in a densely wooded, unfamiliar area, when a thunderstorm suddenly strikes. Torrential downpours, deafening thunder, and scary, electrifying lightening plague you as you strive to continue on your journey. Trying to find a familiar road, you seek ever harder to find your way home. Tired, scared, and terribly hungry, you discover that you will be unable to reach home this night. As fear and uncertainty begin to mount in your heart, a beautiful bed and breakfast suddenly comes into view. You joyfully park your car, and with thanksgiving ringing in the depths of your heart, you bound up the stairs to the inviting front door of the dwelling. Greeted by a warm, cheerful, hospitable face, you are quickly welcomed into the warm abode, ever so comforted by this beautiful shelter. This, dear reader, is the true definition of a shelter. By being sheltered in this home, you are not being blinded to the current events outside the door. You know very well what is taking place outside in the storm-this is the precise reason why you were seeking shelter! You were in a dangerous, destructive world in need of shelter and safety, and when such shelter was offered to you, you eagerly accepted it as a precious gift.
As it pertains to the Biblical practice of stay-at-home daughterhood, being truly sheltered does not mean that you are locked away in your father’s home, uneducated about the ways of the world. Rather, you know all too well the destructive lies and immoral practices of the world, and it is for this reason that you are so thankful for the shelter with which this home affords you. A Biblical stay-at-home daughter is discipled in the ways of Christ by her parents, who strive to teach her the Biblical worldview. Not only this, but they also teach her the lies of the pagan, evil worldviews espoused by many in the world and proceed to equip her with an education which strengthens her with a defense against pervading, unbiblical teachings. Furthermore, she is not “sheltered” in the sense that she is unaware of the vile immorality which takes place in the outside world. Rather, she is protected from those immoral influences and is taught by her parents and by the Holy Spirit, through her reading of the Word, about these various acts of immorality, why they are wrong and dishonoring to the Lord, how they harm those who commit such acts, how to guard against committing them herself, etc. Likewise, a stay-at-home daughter who is operating according to Biblical standards by no means lends a deaf ear and a blind eye to the current events of the day. Far from it! Instead, she understands that as a child of God, it is her duty to be well educated in the events of the day, that she might be able to further the dominion of Christ and fulfill her duty to make disciples. True stay-at-home daughters seek to become highly educated in aspects of history and theology, that they might be able to wage war against the schemes of the Devil, proclaim to others the truth of God and the lies of Satan, sound the alarm of what will happen if the world continues on in its sinfulness and depravity, and much more. In other words, she is nothing like the caricature which those who disdain Biblical daughterhood attempt to paint her as. Instead, she represents her father and his ways well, and joyfully submits to the role God ordained specifically for her, being a truly radiant, intelligent polished corner stone (Ps. 144:112b). When her antagonists attempt to label her as a poor sheltered young woman, she lives out 1 Peter 3:16, which says, “Having a good conscience; that whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.”
In Conclusion
The word “sheltered” is today widely misrepresented, completely misunderstood, and terribly misused. Those who disdain stay-at-home daughterhood claim the word in their attempts to paint this doctrine in the most dire of terms. In doing so, however, they unwittingly refute their own arguments. For, while stay-at-home daughters are not sheltered in the way in which many today claim, they are nonetheless blessedly sheltered (in the true sense of the word!), which is one of the very reasons why they are dedicated to remaining at home. As a bed and breakfast shelters a lost and weary soul from the raging thunderstorm outdoors, so does a father’s home shelter unmarried daughters from the rape, abuse, deception, harassment, murder, unbiblical teachings, sly stalkers and much more which abound in the world. That, dear reader, is the true meaning of being sheltered. And praise the Lord for it!
Footnote
1. Noah Webster, American Dictionary of the English Language (reprinted by Foundation for American Christian Education, 1995)
Friday, March 5, 2010
A Father's Home-A Daughter's Shelter
What follows is the next article in the stay-at-home daughterhood series. If you have not had the opportunity to read the previous articles, please click here and do so now before continuing on with this one. Thank you! :)
~~~~~~~~~
One of the often overlooked blessings of remaining at home-and one of the precise reasons why the Lord has ordained the practice of unmarried daughters remaining under their father’s roof-is the physical and emotional protection which that sphere affords to unmarried daughters. In our day, it is by no means uncommon for daughters to be off on their own-be that at school, work, or one’s own dwelling place-forming relationships with one young man after another, oftentimes without the father’s knowledge or oversight. This is contrary to God’s Word and therefore very dangerous on many levels. When daughters are left alone with young men, emotions tend to flare and one thing leads to another. Meanwhile, there is no one to protect the young woman or to keep her from making hasty, sinful decisions in a moment of passion. It is for this reason that the Lord has commanded fathers to actively preserve and guard their daughters’ purity, in their homes, until they give them in marriage.
Verses 13-21 speak of a situation in which a father gave his daughter to a young man in marriage, claiming that she was indeed a virgin. Sadly, the groom later has reason to believe that this claim was not accurate, and that she had rather lived an impure, unchaste life. The groom goes to her parents in the hopes that they can, in some way, prove to him that his suspicions are groundless and that she has indeed known no other man. If, unfortunately, it becomes known that his accusations were true, and this young woman did indeed give away her purity to another man prior to marriage then the guilty bride was to be stoned.
Now, before we proceed, allow me to make it clear that I am not advocating the stoning of daughters who have given away their virginity prior to marriage! Some may wonder why this is, seeing as how stoning the guilty party was the law. First, this was a law issued to ancient Israel. Second, Jesus, in a sense, abolished this law with his coming. John : - recounts the time when a woman was found to be committing adultery. She was brought before the to be stoned, as the Old Testament Law dictated. Jesus, being in the midst of the crowd about to stone her to death, calls for the attacker who was sinless to cast the first stone. Obviously, not one of them could claim to have no sin, and so one by one, they went home. Finally, only Jesus and the adulteress remained. She marvels that those who were to stone her had departed. He proclaims that He no longer , but that she is to go and sin no more. Therefore, while the passage in Deuteronomy we will be studying today is helpful and provides us with much wisdom and insight into a father’s role, the stoning aspect of this verse is not to be followed through by us today.
Having said this, let us continue on with this passage. First, notice in verse 15 that it is the young woman’s parents who were responsible for providing tokens of her purity. This is because they are to be watching over her, training her in ways of righteousness, involved in her life and knowing the state of her purity and guarding it with all their might.
Second, note in verse 21 where it was she was to be stoned. Was it at the place where she committed her sin of fornication? No-she was to be stoned at “the door of her father’s house”. Why is this? The reason is that it was the father’s duty to guard his daughter and her purity and to be actively involved in her life, that she might not find herself in a compromising situation. While the daughter is guilty for committing the sin (as is shown through her death), the father is disgraced for not fully preserving his daughter’s purity (as is shown in the stoning occurring at his home-the sphere which is to be a place of protection for daughters). Now, clearly, daughters will at times reject and rebel against their father’s authority and protection, leaving the father with little he can do to prevent her from committing an act of impurity. But this verse shows unequivocally that the father is held responsible to guard his daughter from any debilitating influences and entanglements with young men, so as to guard her purity. He has the responsibility of presenting his daughter to a husband as a pure, radiant virgin. This is his task, and this is why his home is to be her place of shelter until he gives her in marriage. Fathers rejecting their duty and instead releasing their daughters to the world to be on their own spells disaster. For, one of the greatest benefits of remaining at home until marriage is the protection it provides against defiling temptation, male predators, and sinful actions which daughters would one day greatly regret. When a daughter is alone with friends or perhaps with just one young man, without the protection of her father, it can be so easy for her to give in to flirting, fleshly desires, and actions which she would otherwise never dream of doing. How appealing the world and its ways can look when off on your own! This is precisely what Mr. Henry was saying when he wrote, “See what came of Dinah’s gadding: young women must learn to be chaste, keepers at home; these properties are put together, Tit. 2:5, for those that are not keepers at home expose their chastity. Dinah went abroad to look about her; but, if she had looked about her as she ought, she would not have fallen into this snare.”1 He wrote furthermore, ““Dinah, when she went to see the daughters of the land, lost her chastity. Those whose home is their prison, it is to be feared, feel that their chastity is their fetters.”2
~~~~~~~~~
One of the often overlooked blessings of remaining at home-and one of the precise reasons why the Lord has ordained the practice of unmarried daughters remaining under their father’s roof-is the physical and emotional protection which that sphere affords to unmarried daughters. In our day, it is by no means uncommon for daughters to be off on their own-be that at school, work, or one’s own dwelling place-forming relationships with one young man after another, oftentimes without the father’s knowledge or oversight. This is contrary to God’s Word and therefore very dangerous on many levels. When daughters are left alone with young men, emotions tend to flare and one thing leads to another. Meanwhile, there is no one to protect the young woman or to keep her from making hasty, sinful decisions in a moment of passion. It is for this reason that the Lord has commanded fathers to actively preserve and guard their daughters’ purity, in their homes, until they give them in marriage.
Deuteronomy 22:13-21
This passage and others similar to it express the fact that God has issued to fathers the all-important duty of guarding their daughter’s purity-body, mind, and heart. While daughters are responsible for the way in which they act, fathers are to protect them from any endangering situations, people, or places. They are not to send their daughters off on their own, admonishing them to guard their hearts and save their bodies for their future husbands. While they should daily impress the importance of doing these things to their daughters, it is their responsibility, as fathers, to take an active role in diligently guarding them from anyone and anything which would seek to deprive them of the blessed gift of their purity. This includes forbidding them from watching vile television programs, not allowing them to forge friendships with those who are living in a manner which is in direct disobedience to God’s Word, and creating any ground rules necessary for the preservation of their purity. Fathers are not “let off the hook” by God when something occurs which compromises their daughter’s chastity. Far from it! Rather, the Lord holds fathers to a high standard and bestows upon them a high and lofty responsibility-the responsibility of guarding, protecting, and leading their daughters under their roof until the day they give them in marriage. This is the teaching of Deuteronomy 22:13-21 and other like passages. Now that we have laid the groundwork for our study of this portion of Scripture, we can delve into it and study the implications thereof.
Verses 13-21 speak of a situation in which a father gave his daughter to a young man in marriage, claiming that she was indeed a virgin. Sadly, the groom later has reason to believe that this claim was not accurate, and that she had rather lived an impure, unchaste life. The groom goes to her parents in the hopes that they can, in some way, prove to him that his suspicions are groundless and that she has indeed known no other man. If, unfortunately, it becomes known that his accusations were true, and this young woman did indeed give away her purity to another man prior to marriage then the guilty bride was to be stoned.
Now, before we proceed, allow me to make it clear that I am not advocating the stoning of daughters who have given away their virginity prior to marriage! Some may wonder why this is, seeing as how stoning the guilty party was the law. First, this was a law issued to ancient Israel. Second, Jesus, in a sense, abolished this law with his coming. John : - recounts the time when a woman was found to be committing adultery. She was brought before the to be stoned, as the Old Testament Law dictated. Jesus, being in the midst of the crowd about to stone her to death, calls for the attacker who was sinless to cast the first stone. Obviously, not one of them could claim to have no sin, and so one by one, they went home. Finally, only Jesus and the adulteress remained. She marvels that those who were to stone her had departed. He proclaims that He no longer , but that she is to go and sin no more. Therefore, while the passage in Deuteronomy we will be studying today is helpful and provides us with much wisdom and insight into a father’s role, the stoning aspect of this verse is not to be followed through by us today.
Having said this, let us continue on with this passage. First, notice in verse 15 that it is the young woman’s parents who were responsible for providing tokens of her purity. This is because they are to be watching over her, training her in ways of righteousness, involved in her life and knowing the state of her purity and guarding it with all their might.
Second, note in verse 21 where it was she was to be stoned. Was it at the place where she committed her sin of fornication? No-she was to be stoned at “the door of her father’s house”. Why is this? The reason is that it was the father’s duty to guard his daughter and her purity and to be actively involved in her life, that she might not find herself in a compromising situation. While the daughter is guilty for committing the sin (as is shown through her death), the father is disgraced for not fully preserving his daughter’s purity (as is shown in the stoning occurring at his home-the sphere which is to be a place of protection for daughters). Now, clearly, daughters will at times reject and rebel against their father’s authority and protection, leaving the father with little he can do to prevent her from committing an act of impurity. But this verse shows unequivocally that the father is held responsible to guard his daughter from any debilitating influences and entanglements with young men, so as to guard her purity. He has the responsibility of presenting his daughter to a husband as a pure, radiant virgin. This is his task, and this is why his home is to be her place of shelter until he gives her in marriage. Fathers rejecting their duty and instead releasing their daughters to the world to be on their own spells disaster. For, one of the greatest benefits of remaining at home until marriage is the protection it provides against defiling temptation, male predators, and sinful actions which daughters would one day greatly regret. When a daughter is alone with friends or perhaps with just one young man, without the protection of her father, it can be so easy for her to give in to flirting, fleshly desires, and actions which she would otherwise never dream of doing. How appealing the world and its ways can look when off on your own! This is precisely what Mr. Henry was saying when he wrote, “See what came of Dinah’s gadding: young women must learn to be chaste, keepers at home; these properties are put together, Tit. 2:5, for those that are not keepers at home expose their chastity. Dinah went abroad to look about her; but, if she had looked about her as she ought, she would not have fallen into this snare.”1 He wrote furthermore, ““Dinah, when she went to see the daughters of the land, lost her chastity. Those whose home is their prison, it is to be feared, feel that their chastity is their fetters.”2
Exodus 22:16-17
To further emphasize a father’s role to protect his daughter, we will now turn to Exodus 22. In verses 16 and 17, we read of a situation in which a young man tempts a young woman and lies with her. Notice whom he has to answer to for his sin: her father. Now, clearly, he ultimately has God to answer to; earthly speaking, however, he must answer to her father, for he is the one in charge of her and given the duty to preserve her purity. The young man must attempt to make things right with him and do what he says, whether that be to marry her or simply pay a dowry price for her. Again, we see illustrated the fact that fathers are the ones vested with the task of protecting their daughters-body, mind, and heart.
In Conclusion
You see, daughters are not called on to remain at home until marriage because God has some evil desire to lock them up and not allow them to see the light of day. Nor are they to be there so that they might be deprived of the opportunity to use their gifts or advance the cause of Christ. Rather, God has placed them in the sphere of home that they might be protected and guarded against the wicked, wretched influences and people which desire to destroy them. If you are a daughter with a father who actively seeks to guard your purity, praise God for that tremendous blessing! Do not ever take that for granted. Sadly, many girls today do not have a father like that. If you are a daughter whose father is not interested in the least in protecting you and your purity, take heart! Pray that the Lord would change your father; you never know what the Lord may do in his heart! He works miracles even in our day; with God, all things are possible!
Footnotes
1. Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible (Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., 2991) pg. 73
2. Ibid, pg. 2370
Footnotes
1. Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible (Hendrickson Publishers, Inc., 2991) pg. 73
2. Ibid, pg. 2370
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