Friday, April 23, 2010

What's the Big Deal?: Presenting the Crucial Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God Part 1

If you have not yet had the opportunity to read the previous articles released in this series, please click here and do so now, before continuing on with this one!


You have just begun to read the 15th article in the stay-at-home daughterhood article series. Much time, study, prayer, research, writing, re-writing, editing, and replying to comments from readers have gone into this project. Why would I dedicate such time and effort to such a work as this? The answer lies in the importance which the Word of God places upon Biblical womanhood and its correlation with the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood. The practice of unmarried daughters remaining at home until marriage is so viciously hated in our culture today (the reason behind feminism’s hatred of stay-at-home daughterhood will be discussed in an upcoming article). As we know, the Adversary works tirelessly to alter the truths of God’s Word, to slyly deceive and cleverly trick us into following lies, and to keep us from living out the all-wise plan and design of the Creator God. This is why it is so crucial for us to grasp the depth of the importance of the Bible’s teaching on the roles of unmarried daughters, so that we might return to “the old paths, where is the good way” (Jer. 6:16).

The Importance of Stay-at-home Daughterhood to the Kingdom of God

The doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood and obedience thereto is crucial for a number of reasons, the first and most important of which can be articulated as follows:

Stay-at-home daughterhood is crucial to the Kingdom of God because God Himself commands it.

This fact is the one which makes stay-at-home daughterhood so very important to the health and furtherance of the Kingdom of God. While other facts can (and will) be brought up which lead credence to the belief that stay-at-home daughterhood is important, no other fact is as crucial as the one illustrated above. Nor does any other fact give stay-at-home daughterhood the vast level of importance as this one does. Because God, in His Word, clearly reveals His design for Biblical daughterhood, it is imperative that we follow and obey it faithfully and with great diligence and joy, knowing God’s will to always be best.

There are many in our day who view this doctrine as archaic, with no relevance to today’s more “enlightened” and “progressive” times. However, nothing could be further from the truth. This stance arises from the belief that stay-at-home daughterhood is mere tradition from the ancient days of Judaism and that it therefore holds no bearing upon the Church. If this were the case, I would not take the time to write such a lengthy defense of stay-at-home daughterhood as I have in this article series. For, following mere human tradition has been what has caused such heresy and seeds of discord and trouble to arise in the Church through the past two millennia. For example, in Jesus’ day, the Pharisees (the Jewish leaders) were notorious for creating their own traditions, elevating them to the level of Old Testament law, and striving to enforce the people around them into following these human practices. By doing so, they were guilty of wicked legalism and of forcing the poor people around them into terrible bondage. Jesus was furious with the actions and teachings of the Pharisees. Time and again, He confronted them with rebukes against their legalistic teachings and man-made laws. In one such encounter, as recorded in Mark 7, Jesus chastised them with the following words, quoting the book of Isaiah, “Howbeit in vain do they worship Me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men” (Mk. 7:7). He went on to say, “Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition” (vs. 9). What a disgrace it would be for Christians to be guilty of living and acting in such a manner as this! In like words, the Lord, in Deuteronomy 4:2 says, “Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the Lord your God which I command you.” Clearly, being guilty of adding to God’s Word through the following of mere man-made tradition and practice is a dire sin indeed! One who obeys, and likewise teaches, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, however, is far from guilty of this charge! Grasping this fact was one of the reasons why I felt compelled to begin this series. Observing how many in Christendom either ignore the Bible’s teachings on this subject or else describe it as archaic and the practice as legalistic and based on mere tradition, was alarming. As I began to study this subject and discover the teachings of God, as well as the teachings and plans of those who hate this beloved doctrine, I began to discover just how far Christendom has wandered from the design of God, that it might follow after the deceptive ways of the enemies of God. It was then, as I began to see the crucial importance of this doctrine to the health and productivity of Christendom, that I set out to formulate this series. From the very beginning, it has been my heart-felt desire to show you not only God’s will and teachings on this topic, but furthermore to express to you just why it is that Christians of the 21st century ought to obey them just as those Christians did in the 1st century or as those Israelites did at the time of Moses.

As stated above, to follow a method or teaching that is based solely on human tradition or outdated practices and then to furthermore force others into following such a lifestyle is a grave sin which the Lord will not take lightly nor overlook. However, the doctrine of stay-at-home daughterhood, though first articulated in Moses’ day, is a never-ending commandment of God which is still to be practiced by Christians in our day. To illustrate this fact, what follows is a review and summary of what we learned in the 7 part article on the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood. The following reveals that stay-at-home daughterhood is not only commanded in the Scriptures, but is also described and illustrated in various portions of the Bible. Not only this, but the Lord has also provided us in His Word examples of stay-at-home daughters.

The Roles of Women

At the very beginning of this series was a study of why woman was created-what she was created to do, what her purpose is, what the Lord expects of her, and the roles and responsibilities He has wisely and lovingly given solely to her. In that 4 part study, we determined that woman was given four specific roles-she was to be a helpmeet to man, a mother, a homemaker, and under the authority and protection of man, both prior to and during marriage. This revelation shows us that a woman’s life and roles all center around the home and family which, as presented in part 1 of the article on the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood, reveals to us that young women, as well, are to lead lives which are occupied with duties to home and family. We discovered that as a result of woman’s roles, even if there were no passages in the Holy Scriptures dealing specifically with the issue of stay-at-home daughterhood, we could still deduce that an unmarried daughter’s life is to be like that of a woman at any age-it is to be characterized by ministry and work in the home, for the sake of the family and all others who enter that home.

Numbers 30

Numbers 30 is Old Testament law which deals with the responsibility husbands and fathers have of leading and protecting their wives and daughters. Interestingly, this passage lays forth the responsibility fathers have of diligently protecting and having authority over their daughters until the time those daughters marry. In other words, according to Numbers 30, daughters are to remain at home with their fathers until they marry, at which time they are to be led and protected by their husbands. Crystal clear through the reading of this chapter is that there is no time in a daughter’s life when she is to be off on her own, leading her own life and seeking to protect herself. Daughters are shown to be under the authority and protections of their fathers up until they are transferred to the authority and protection of their husbands. In other words, in Numbers 30, in the very law of God itself, there is no time in which a daughter is to be off on her own. If you would like to study this chapter and the implications thereof, I encourage you to read part 2 of the Biblical case for stay-at-home daughterhood article, which is dedicated solely to the teachings of Numbers 30.

As presented in the article on Numbers 30, while this chapter is indeed Old Testament law, it is nonetheless binding upon New Testament Christians today. There are indeed portions of the Old Testament law which are in no way binding upon today’s Christians, for Christ fulfilled them. An example of these would be the sacrificial law, the ceremonial law, the laws pertaining to feasts, and the various laws pertaining to Sabbaths. Christ was and is the ultimate sacrifice, the forgiver of sins, and the rest for our weary souls. Therefore, these areas of Old Testament law are not binding on New Testament Christians, and those who strive to bind Christians to the following of these laws are being as legalistic as were the Pharisees of Jesus’s time. Numbers 30 and other moral laws, and laws dealing with family dynamics, however, are binding to this very day. And if they are not followed by Christians, those Christians are sadly guilty of disobeying the commands of God.

Sons Leave, Daughters are Given

The Lord also presents stay-at-home daughterhood when, in His Word, sons are described as going out and finding wives of their own, while daughters are said to be given by their fathers in marriage. This is revealed in numerous passages, such as Genesis 28:1, 5-7; 29:1, 19, 24; 34:9. While sons leave the homes of their childhood, that they might search out a wife, daughters are shown to be remaining at home under the protection of their fathers until they give them in marriage. The Bible is replete with examples of this.

Leviticus 22:13 and Other Assorted Passages

As stated previously in this series, there are passages throughout Scripture which state that daughters remain at home with their families until the time of their marriages, one of which is Leviticus 22:13. This passage, which states, “But if the priest’s daughter be a widow, or divorced, and have no child, and is returned unto her father’s house, as in her youth, she shall eat of her father’s meat; but there shall no stranger eat thereof,” shows that it was normative for daughters to remain at home until marriage, as opposed to leading autonomous lifestyles up until marriage. Not only this, but protection of women is so important to our Lord, Who desires for women to never be alone, but to rather be lovingly provided for, that widows commonly returned to the homes of their families following the deaths of their husbands. Examples of this are Ruth and Orpah. Furthermore, women are so dear to the heart of the Lord Jesus Christ that, in the book of John, He commissioned John to care for His mother, Mary, after His death. From that moment on, Mary remained in John’s home, being cared for and protected as Jesus had commanded.

Psalms 45 and 144

In a previous article, these beautiful Psalms were discussed and studied. Psalm 45:10 shows that the royal daughter lived at home with her father until the time of her wedding. Furthermore, verse 13 reveals that in the palace, be that her father’s or her husband’s, she was glorious. She was not some household drudge. No, far from it! She was as the Proverbs 31 woman, who was a glory in her home. Psalm 144:12 presents the role given to each and every unmarried daughter-that of being a polished cornerstone in her father’s home. A daughter is to be preoccupied not with jobs, interests, and duties outside her home; but rather, her main priority is to be her home-she is to work there, minister there, and serve there. That is the glorious sphere which the Lord provided for her, and it is there where she can be glorious. These passages reveal to us the Lord’s will that daughters not only remain at home until marriage, but that they remain fruitful and productive there, ever seeking to strengthen those who enter therein.

1 Corinthians 7:36-38

The idea that stay-at-home daughterhood is taught only in the Old Testament is based upon ignorance and falsehood, for in 1 Corinthians 7:36-38, fathers are given the authority to choose whether they will give their daughters in marriage or keep them (thereby again implying that their daughters are at home with them until marriage). The KJV makes it clear that fathers and daughters are the subjects of these verses, while more modern translations such as the ESV, blur this truth and attempt to present this passage as dealing with people who are betrothed. However, many who staunchly defend the ESV nonetheless admit that the translation and interpretation of verses 36-38 should be understood to be referring to fathers and the authority they have over their daughters.

Examples of Stay-at-home Daughters

Not only does the Lord issue forth commands regarding the lifestyles of unmarried daughters and provide passages illustrating and describing stay-at-home daughterhood, He also places in His Word examples of daughters who remained at home until marriage. Women such as Rebekah, Rachel, and Zipporah, among others, are shown to have been productive, fruitful daughters who worked hard to serve their families and households.

In Conclusion

The purpose of this presentation was to reiterate the fact that stay-at-home daughterhood is presented throughout all of Scripture. Through revealing this to be the case, it should become clear that the main reason why stay-at-home daughterhood is so crucially important is because God has commanded and ordained this practice (Num. 30, 1 Cor. 7:36-38, etc.). God alone is all-wise; and therefore, He alone has the wisdom and knowledge to dictate what we are to do in order to flourish and further His Kingdom. We humans often attempt to serve God on our own terms, leading lives not according to God’s laws, but rather according to what we want to do. This, however, cannot accurately be deemed service. If we desire to advance the Kingdom of God and its causes, then we must live and serve on His terms and according to His design. It is therefore crucial that we unearth the long lost practice of stay-at-home daughterhood and once again live according to the dictates of God’s Word alone. When we do so, we may be surprised as to just how fruitfully we are able to serve the Lord and advance His dominion on this earth! We have an exciting opportunity before us-an opportunity to advance Christ’s Kingdom in amazing and exciting ways. To do so, however, we must live not according to what our goals may be or what the world expects of us. We must pattern our lives according to God’s unchanging Word and it alone. The question is-will Christendom be willing to give up the ways of the world, that they might serve and glorify Christ on His terms rather than our own? It is my prayer that this will be the case, both for the sake of the Lord and His Kingdom and for that of the world to which we are called to minister!


  1. The Biblical way to spell Rachel is with one 'a' not two.

  2. Seriously, you should correct the spelling of Rachel. If you are going to use someone as an example in your writings, the only decent thing to do is to spell their name correctly.

  3. I understand that you have been indoctrinated/trained to respond to any argument/questioning on your beliefs about being a SAHD, and probably have an extensive list of biblical quotes and justifications to answer my point. That being said, I am not questioning your faith in general, as a christian I admire your conviction, but don't understand your SAHD concept, nor can I reconcile it with the Bible itself. You frequently quote the Old Testament and apparently take *some* parts off it literally (as I don't see that you follow Leviticain law with regard to mixing fabric, stoning etc.), and in doing so, you seem to presume if not assume that you yourself and your Dad know what Jesus himself thought about the subject, which to me is downright arrogant as he said nothing regarding what you espouse. in fact, I think Jesus himself said that HE negated the ridiculous Old Testament laws that were mostly made for the physical continuance of life in general, and that HE was the ultimate prophet, above all before him, not your Dad.

  4. Anonymous, I am quite sure that Rebekah will give you a more than adequate answer to your concerns, but let me say just a couple of things if you don't mind.

    I admire your conviction, but don't understand your SAHD concept,...>>>>

    The SAHD model is actually quite simple. A single young lady stays at home until she is given in marriage by her father to her husband. Remember the traditional marriage ceremony which includes the father of the bride giving her away to the groom? The pastor asks," Who gives this bride?" The father, who has also walked the aisle with his daughter, answers "her mother and I do."

    ...nor can I reconcile it with the Bible itself.>>>>

    Are you able to show that in the Bible there was any other model used? We are talking about the same Bible, aren't we?

    You frequently quote the Old Testament and apparently take *some* parts off it literally (as I don't see that you follow Leviticain law with regard to mixing fabric, stoning etc.), and in doing so, you seem to presume if not assume that you yourself and your Dad know what Jesus himself thought about the subject, which to me is downright arrogant as he said nothing regarding what you espouse. >>>>

    So, do you pretend to know that Jesus was not an advocate of the SAHD model? What did He advocate about marriage?

    in fact, I think Jesus himself said that HE negated the ridiculous Old Testament laws...>>>>

    He never called the OT "ridiculous". Do you know what the NT said about the OT Law? Why would Jesus think that something He came to fulfill in every way until all was finished think that the Law was ridiculous? The Law of God is perfect. It's righteous standard is impeccable.

    that were mostly made for the physical continuance of life in general,...>>>>>

    Is it no longer important that physical life continue?

    and that HE was the ultimate prophet, above all before him, not your Dad. >>>>

    You are making the false assumption that Rebekah believes her Dad to be greater than Jesus. I would have a very hard time believing that you have read anything that Rebekah has actually said.

    Anonymous, I am concerned for you. You say that you are a Christian, yet you show a very low view of Scripture. How much have you actually studied of the Bible, let alone what Rebekah is saying?

    If you are going to try to refute someone's teachings, shouldn't you familiarize yourself with same?

    Hey, have a good day.

  5. Anonymous,

    Thank you for pointing out the incorrect spelling! :) All of my articles are carefully edited by myself as well as my parents, but having said that, spelling errors can still go by unnoticed at times!

    And, yes, it is indeed important to spell someone's name correctly. People commonly misspell my name, as well, so I understand that personally.

    Thank you again for pointing that out,

  6. Anon, it was a simple mistake. I'm sure Rebekah is generally very diligent about her spelling.

  7. There's no reason to be concerned for someone because they disagree about another's interpretation, Mrs. Webfoot. There's a difference between calling the entire OT ridiculous and clarifying that Jesus did, indeed, refute many of the legalistic laws. I'm sure you understood Anon's comment thus.


Hi!! Thank you so much for visiting my blog! Please come back often. Thank you for your comment as well; your input is always most welcome! Even if you disagree with something, I encourage you to leave a comment; I just ask that you do so in a loving and Christ-like manner.

God bless you!

~Rebekah S.